Would you have been hurt too?

What exactly was said? As it's difficult to give you advice, unless we know what exactly was said and the context it was said in.

x

Ok.

CBM updated her status about a job application, my sister wished her good luck and I also posted to wish her good luck and said to my sister jokingly "You beat me to it lol". Then my sister replied "You're getting slow in your old age Bridezilla".

I guess the context is that my sister is the golden child and my mum constantly sides were her disruptive and rude behaviour especially when she wanted to wear a dress cut right down to below her boobs as a bridesmaid dress, and her watching to have her hair and make up the same as mine. CBM has seen this and the upset it causes me so I just would have appreciated it if she'd backed me up as I would have done the same to her.

Is your CBM friends with your Sister too? Because if she is, then it may just be that she wants to stay impartial and hopes that you'll sort it out between you. Or maybe she doesn't think it's that much of a deal, and that it wont bother you.

x

Ummm, actually as an outsider it doesn't sound too bad to me...I think she might be making a joke?

I realise there are other issues but I wouldn't look too deeply into it TBH.

As for the hair and make up I really wouldn't be bothered as even if you have exactly the same you'll both 'wear' it differently.

Have you ever thought that perhaps she actually wants to be more like you and is struggling to be herself...?

She's not friends with my sister. They're only friends on fbook because my sister is the type to add everyone she ever met. I've talked to CBM about how much it bothers me that she and my mum regularly call me bridezilla so she should know.

Thanks Tahdah. Maybe I am making a mountain out of a molehill. Our relationship has been so poor since we got engaged that it doesn't feel like she can just make a joke like that. And she really doesn't want to be more like me, she says "wobble wobble" under her breath each time I walk past her, she constantly criticises my hair and make up etc.

Personally I think you should give your bm a break! The golden rule is never get involved in other peoples family issues as they are so complex. Also to be honest reacting to a silly comment on FB isn't even worth the hassle, forget about it, its no big deal.

Post deleted.

x

The comment probably would have rubbed me up the wrong way a bit, considering your relationship and that you don't get on very well as it is. But I wouldn't dwell on it - it's just a passing comment which was possibly meant in a joking way. I also wouldn't be hurt that your friend didn't stick up for you - after all, you're sisters so she probably just wants to stay out of it, especially if she knows you both have a bit of a rocky relationship at best.

I can understand why you feel a bit annoyed but I wouldn't make it into any more of an issue, all you'll do then is cause more arguments and tension. Having said that though I do hope you come to some sort of happy resolution with your sister, doesn't sound as if things are good at the moment ?

Thanks everyone. I think I am just going to leave it. I feel so stupid for bowing down to the pressure of having my sister as a bridemaid, the one time I suggested she step down my mum threatened me with loads of stuff. I'm just thinking she's going to try and throw some kind of stunt at the wedding.

After the wedding I'm going to cut my sister out of my life, I thought about it a lot and it seems the best decision. H2B wants to do that too. She just has this toxic effect on me, no one makes me miserable like her. I can't wait until the wedding is over and I can have as little as possible to do with her.

Ooh la la I liked your idea, I'll certainly be thinking it! x

I have been marrieed for 5 years and accidentally clicked wedding planning instead of BT so [hello]

As far as your CBM not saying anyhting, I wouldn't get involved in a family dispute and shre is probably more worried about the job interview.

For your sister, next time you see her I would tellher she is a b!tch and ask her why she wants to be your BM, hopefully she will opt not to at that point. If not I would cut her from the wedding party anyway. You are only doing this once, you don't need her there tbh. I didn't even invite guests to my day reception who I did not anticipate staying in contact with let only planning to cull a member of the wedding party.

Have a fab day and quite frankly, screw her.