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Chloe
Expert July 2023 Cornwall

Fmil... It gets better!!!

Chloe, 1 July 2022 at 17:12 Posted on Etiquette and Advice 0 5
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Thought I'd share, as I've seen many a post on here about difficult FMILs.

Those of you who have been following my FMIL dramas know what a saga it's been and how challenging and unsupportive FMIL has been.

A little while ago FH put his foot down (somewhat prompted by me saying I had hit the point where I was just unwilling to be in the same room with her because I didn't want to put myself in a position to be treated rudely and risk saying something I'd regret and never be able to take back). It was horrid, he had some awful exchanges from her after calling her out on her behaviour but he put it all out in the open and very firmly told her she was being disrespectful and needed to stop. She didn't apologise, but did agree to draw a line under it and start fresh.

Anyway we went to visit on Sunday and I was incredibly nervous. HOWEVER, she was very obviously making a huge effort to be nice to me the entire day!!!!!!

I did go in very much ready to "kill her with kindness" as my mum put it, so I think that probably helped as I could have gone in a bit stand off-ish and with my guard up, but FH's painful but necessary calling out clearly did the trick.

So for anyone else with FMIL woes, hang in there, don't let yourself get walked all over and let FH fight the battle because it can get better Smiley heart

5 replies

Latest activity by Michelle, 6 July 2022 at 21:42
  • Charlotte
    VIP April 2022 Wiltshire
    Charlotte ·
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    Oh Chloe, this is great news, I guess you will still bebwaey for a while and she has to prove herself over time but this is a great step. Is a shame it had to get to this point but pleased it is hopefully going to work out ok xx
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  • Michelle
    VIP July 2023 Cheshire
    Michelle ·
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    So glad she actually got it in her head so happy for you after so long now you can enjoy your planning a lot more x💗 it will take time for you to trust her but hopefully it will work out
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  • R
    Super July 2020 Monmouthshire
    RomanticGreenStationery27135 ·
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    Glad things went well and that you were able to put it behind you and be nice to her even though you were so nervous. I hope this is the start of a permanent change in her behaviour, but even if it isn't (or she has temporary relapses into her old ways), at least you can know that you are doing everything you can to maintain a good relationship. Well done to you and your OH for handling this so well - it bodes well for your future together that you can both deal with something so difficult in this way xxx

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  • Chloe
    Expert July 2023 Cornwall
    Chloe ·
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    Thanks everyone! And thanks for all your support too Smiley heart

    I'll definitely still be wary of her for some time but there is a light at the end of the tunnel!!

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  • Michelle
    VIP July 2023 Cheshire
    Michelle ·
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    Glad it worked out for you x💗
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