A weekday wedding, any issues with guests not coming?

My H's aunt couldn't come to ours cos of work and childcare (we didn't invite his cousins) - everyone else made it. My bro and SIL are teachers and had to take the day off unpaid though, which I guess some people wouldn't be prepared/able to afford to do. I was very clear that I understood people were taking time off work and travelling fair distances so we didn't expect gifts - everyone still brought them though!

This has been brought up before and there are several factors to think about:

- Even if you give guests plenty of notice, some like teachers may not be able to come if its a long distance

- Some may come, but not stay late due to work/taking kids to school the next day

Suppliers will be cheaper, but there are bound to be guests that cant come, or wont stay late- a saving on drinks too, as more will drive so they can get home.

We're getting married on the weds after Easter and all our guests are coming because we've done it in the school holidays. Those that can will come those that can't sadly won't. You just have to accept that. But it doesn't mean people don't care, jiust that they can't make it. Our after wedding party is on a Saturday and shifts mean that quite a lot can't make that. It's just how it goes.

Hi, ours is on a Wednesday and it hasn't been a problem for anyone. We sent out the invitations a good 6.5 months in advance so people had time to book it off. And some have said how great it is because their travel, flights, hotels etc have been cheaper!

It is in the school holidays though, which was essential for us because I've got a school age child and so do a few of my more important guests.

Mine is in August so in the middle of summer hols, I work in a school too, we spoke to quite a few if the guests before we booked and they said they'd come regardless of the day.

I suppose it's just me worrying, what will be will be.

i know of two weddings on the Saturday after mine that involve some of the same 'groups' of people so even on a Saturday they are going to have issues with guests not coming

thank you for your responses xx

I'll be honest, I'd only come if you were very important to me, but then that's what you want anyway really! I would have a grumble though :-)

We got married on a Monday in term time but had our reception the following Saturday. We did have some guests who couldn't make the wedding because they work in schools but we also had some guests who couldn't make the reception because of other commitments, some involving work.

whenever you get married you will possibly have people who cannot make it - that's just how it goes.

We did the same as you, we are getting married on a Thursday because our venue charged £1k more for a Friday or Saturday. We sent out RSVPs a few weeks ago and only had 2 'no' so far; one because she is a teacher up north (we are getting married in Devon) and the other because she will be on holiday - fair enough.

I think that you have to remember that you won't be able to accommodate and please everyone; weekends wouldn't suit some people who work in retail for example. Those that grumble 'just because it isn't traditional' can sod off!

Dawn

We got married on a Thursday, which meant two days off for guests, because most of our friends had to travel to our wedding anyway. It was in the school holidays and we had a fair few who couldn't make it, mostly halves of couples. What tended to happen was the one who was most our friend came and their partner didn't. I reckon we had about seven of those, plus three couples who couldn't make it because they were away on holiday. On the whole though, the friends we really wanted to have there were the ones who managed it.

Ours was £2k cheaper than getting married on the Saturday of the same week!!

My cousin (we are very close) got married on a Friday and I couldn't go- she was gutted but I am a teacher and my school would not give me the day as unpaid leave (it's at their discretion) but I managed to dash there straight after and was at the evening reception.

We are getting married on a Monday (school holidays) and I thought some people may not be able to go but everyone is coming! It's a very small wedding and half the people are grandparents so retired lol, but our parents and siblings and their partners have all taken a day off. I told my brother and his partner (who live hours away) that I would completely understand if they could not come, but happily they were both able to book time off.

Just don't take it personally if people can't come. But I am sure most will!

We're getting married on a Wednesday (2K cheaper than a Saturday!), and so far we've only really had ppl decline because they're on holiday! Only an aunt an uncle have declined for unspecified reasons but i'm not fussed if they're there anyway! Basically, if ppl want to be at you're wedding, they'll do their best to be there! :-)

As a teacher I have been refused time off work for a wedding so that might be your only problem as it wasn't a case of didn't want to go but really couldn't go, mid week in school holidays are good for me though! But as someone else said, if ppl are having to travel far and it requires more than one day off work that's where u may have some probs as well!

We're getting married on a Thursday in the summer holidays (I'm a teacher as are lots of our guests). My fiancé works in retail so a Saturday wedding would have been difficult for lots of his friends. We did it so that we could have our dream venue as it was stupidly cheaper to get married on the Thursday than the Friday. We sent out save the dates well in advance - I'm talking 18 months before to give people the heads up. We sent our invites out at the start of this week and have had 7 RSVPs so far (our deadline isn't until the end of May!) - all of who are coming! I don't think it's going to be an issue for people. I would say just give people as much notice as possible

We are the day after Pammy and so far only one person isn't coming. We chose the holidays as I have young nieces and nephews and my sister in law works in a school.

for us it didn't matter if it was week or weekend. Inevitably some people wouldn't have been able to come, we both have a lot of friends who work in the same line of work as us and work weekends.

if you are happy to accept that some people won't be able to make it or will have to leave early then go for it. We saved just over 2k by having it on a Thursday.

Something to factor in is the time of year and how much notice you give people - I know by the time it reaches mid July for instance all my annual leave has been assigned either through the year or for Christmas (it rolls over in January) so if you have a October or November wedding then factor things like this in. Therefore the more advanced notice you can give people the better as it gives people time to sort.

If most of your guests are local though and not teachers then it shouldn't be a problem, it's the one's who are far distances away - for us a mid day wedding would mean 3 days off for travel either side.

Just make sure that you clarify on any save the dates or invitations that it's a weekday. We once received a save the date for a friday wedding that didn't say it was a Friday. We don't use a calendar, we just remember the dates we're busy, so we didn't notice for ages that it wasn't a weekend - we just made sure whenever we made plans in July that the plans didn't clash with the date of the wedding. By the time we finally realised, my OH had used up all his holiday - if we'd noticed when we we got the save the date he could have saved a day. I appreciate that most people do actually write things down, but just something to think about. We have been very clear on our save the dates that our wedding is "bank holiday Sunday" so that our guests don't make the same mistake!

I'm a Monday wedding in August, as 2 of my bridesmaids are teachers we had to have it in the holidays to ensure they had no excuse for not coming..! We also sent save the dates a year in advance, to make sure anyone who grumbled about the Monday would have enough time to get over it...I just see it as an extension to the weekend, and like some of the other B2B's meant I could have my dream venue at an affordable price.

So far I've only had 1 decline from a plus one, so not losing any sleep so far..!

It's so refreshing to see so many other people getting married on a weekday (other than a Friday!). I felt like I was the only one due to the countless "oh a Monday wedding?" comments! We're also getting married in August (2016) so that it was easier for teachers in the family to join us. We are just going to make sure we send out save the dates fairly early so that if people do want to come they know not to book a holiday and know that they may need to take leave. As someone else has said - so many people work weekends these days (my H2B included) that no matter when you get married - someone is always going to have to take a day off work. I'm just preparing myself for the fact that people may not stay too late - but my friends have assured me that they will be staying until the end! ?

I have been to weekday weddings before. Just be aware that some people may leave fairly early in order to be ok for work the next day. The evening section of both the week day wedding I went to were quiet. One bride was really upset so just expect it and then you won't be :-)

^^^ that's a good point. We wrote on our invitations that we are staying in the hotel the night before, so anyone who wants to join us could- and also wrote "celebrations will finish around 4pm, when we shall be going off on our honeymoon!" so that everyone realised there was no evening do at all.