Advice needed - should you invite someone you know doesn't like you??

These things are always tricky. What I would say, is that it boils down to how it would make your university friend feel if you didn't invite her. Would he be unlikely to come? Would it cause an argument between the three of you? In these scenarios, the innocent friend usually loses out and you have to weigh up what's more important. If it were one of my good friends, I'd want them there no matter what 'price' I had to pay in terms of their plus one.

Depends how much you want him there.maybe just plus one him without a name and he may bring a friend as she may not want to come

It's your wedding! I would personally do what makes you happiest. She clearly doesn't make you happy!

I had to invite my sister and i hate her with a passion to keep my folks happy- no sister- no friends so i had to have the cow there and she had to make a fuss after dinner and was escorted away from the venue... so personally no dont invite her BUT i agree with another poster by just 'plus 1' on the invite just to keep things sweet- but with 75 people there on your special day you will not notice her cos you will be too busy to be thinking about her.. good luck ?

I wudnt invite her, Id just explain to your fellas friend and maybe show him the email that she said SHE didnt want to meet up and be friends with you anymore........i understand about the awquadness (sp) and theres no way Id have that around me on my wedding day!!

If your fellas mate really wants her there, maybe try again to meet up before just so its breaks the ice b4 ure big day xxxx

I am in the same boat with one of my fiance's friends girlfriends. We really do not get on, at all. And unfortunately, we've invited and she's accepted our invitation to our wedding. If it was up to me, neither of them would be coming but it's my h2b's day as much as mine so I had to compromise. I've decided I will be civil with her as it's my day and if she's a dick, then she can leave!

Normally I would say if other people get a plus 1 you should invite the guy and give him the option to bring her. From the sounds of things she might just decide not to come on her own!

HOWEVER, I have been on the receiving end of one of those friendship break-up emails and I understand how much it hurts, and the thought that someone isn't even willing to try, when you obviously are.. well, it would be too much for me. Luckily the girl who 'broke up' with me isn't marrying one of my or my partner's friends.

So, I would say invite the guy, sans plus 1. It's quite likely that he know about the deterioration of your friendship, but if he asks if she's invited at a later point, I think your OH would need to have a talk with him and just let hiim know that she wasn't invited because she told you she didn't want to have you in her life anymore, and that you haven't invited her for HER sake!

I wouldn't invite her but invite him and give him a call and politely explain why. Surely he is smart enough to see why you wouldn't invite someone who has gone out of their way to say they don't want to be your friend to the most important day of your life? If he's a real friend hell understand, besides which if she doesn't want to be your friend surely she's not expecting or wanting to come to your wedding?

Hey,

its your wedding do what ever make you happy. but be sure that your decision will not create any problem in future life.

If i was you i would invite your oh's friend and on the invite put his name then plus one rather than mentioning her name, you have done the "right thing" and given your oh's friend the option to bring his girlfriend but its a big enough hint that she just might not turn up or at least know shes being invited because of whos shes with rather than because you like her. my oh plays football and most of the guys he wants to invite to our wedding and a few of there girlfriends are horrible and i hate that there invited (even if its only to the evening!) so they are all "plus ones" there invited but if they want to have a hissy fit that there not officialy invited on the invite then thats there choice if they stay at home! ?

I struggled to read the small text so in answer to the title I couldn't invite somebody I knew didn't like me. This is why my sister isn't attending my wedding, as I couldn't possibly have any dark clouds overshadowing our day.

I'd invite him only. if he thinks of your OH & you as friends he will come on his own. if he asks why she wasnt invited then you tell him honestly. if she kicks off as to why she hasnt been invited..you point out she didnt want to be friends any more and to nob off.

I think I'd invite her - well, I'd treat their invitation like all your other friends and if you've put partners names on other invitations then I'd put hers on their invitation.

I would, however, ensure that your OH's friend is aware, prior to the wedding, of the email she sent to you following your attempts at friendships and let him know that you felt a little uneasy inviting her (because you didn't want her to feel uncomfortable). He/she may do the right thing and not turn up BUT once the invitations have been sent, forget all about her and focus on the 74 other people who you'll be struggling to find time to talk to all day. Honestly, she won't matter...whether she comes or not - but I would give yourself the moral high ground here ?.

There's no way I could have someone who had been like that with me at my wedding. If her partner is a good friend then he'll accept that and attend on his own. I would much rather give her place to someone I liked and wanted to share my special day with me

This. I would go with what some others have said and give your Uni friend a plus one so that you feel you are doing the right thing by seemingly inviting them both but as she has made it clear that she doesnt want to be your friend and it has been awkward between you since her text she may well decide to not come and it leaves your friend an option to bring someone else if he wants to.

It would be a bit hypocritical of her to expect to attend your wedding after the message she sent but at least with a plus one on the invite it would be seen to be her problem and not yours.

I wouldnt invite her, she has made it clear that she was not even willing to give it a try and has told you that you are no longer friends. Yo wouldnt invite some stranger off the street and shess made it clear she wants to be as good as that to you.

WSS

But, is there a compromise of just inviting her to the evening so that her presence is a bit more diluted? If she had any sense she wouldn't come even if she was invited.

If it was me, I'd be the bigger person & invite her to your wedding. There's so much going on and the day goes so quickly you won't even notice her!

Plus if you don't invite her it might cause problems between you & your husband and his friend

Sorry not sure what happened with my text on the first post!

Well it seems this is an issue which quite a few people have had experience with!! Thanks for all the responses I really appreciate the feedback. Im thinking, the +1 route might be the best way to do it, if nothing has improved by then. Were getting married in November so if anything changes we can review what to do.

I think like a lot of you are saying its going to be a busy day anyway so its not like ill be stuck with her for the duration!

Thanks guys lots of food for thought!!

Its all well and good saying be the bigger person, however it's clear the OP has already tried to be that and it was thrown back in her face. If the girl had any sense she wouldn't even have the balls to turn up nor have the ordasity to question it if she was not invited. I know if I was her, I wouldn't and If i were you I wouldn't even want her there.
I think possibly the best route would be +1 for you overall though.