Am I being stingy/unreasonable - hen weekend related

Yes i think it is unreasonable to expect someone to pay that much for a hen/stag weekend.

Why do people need weekends nowadays? I got married in August and me and H had 1 night out each, we didn't want to put pressure on our friends to come away for a weekend and to be honest we couldnt afford it ourselves either what with the expense of the actual wedding.

Cor mine cost 30 quid for everyone...I was a cheap date!!

I think you do just have to speak to your friend. I have ducked out of quite a few that would cost lots of money/holiday times just because it would stretch us.

I suspect some brides have gotten so used to the large figures involved in planning a wedding that by the time they get to organising their hen plans, £500 seems nothing in the great scheme of things...

Sadly £500 would be a massive outlay in my scheme so I'd be declining the invitation without any question!

PMSL at NickJ's wizeness ?

I'm not bothered by things like this - I like going away with my mates so will think of it as a holiday rather than a hen thing and I won't go if I can't afford it/don't have holidays etc.

A chicken neck? They don't have big necks though so you wouldn't have had much to eat! ?

I usually try and look at them as nights away with friends or whatever, but it is getting out of hand.

We are away on stag/hen things this weekend in Dublin, and I think we spent less overall on a short break to Portugal last year.

I'm secretly pleased I'm working on Friday night because it means only one night out in an expensive city, not having to buy a halloween costume and an hour by myself in the hotel bar with a book and a large glass of wine.

I did a night out thing with dinner in a lovely restaurant and then dancing. The b&b was so cheap it was comical and we had a fab time.

I tried to be thoughtful with my hen night- I went to a pottery (£2 for materials and the most expensive thing you could "make" was about £20) and then to a nightclub in soho with a £17 for 2 courses top table offer. This was because I wanted my little sister to come who earns very little.

I still had an absolutley shite time due to whinging about money, from MIL and MrHs cousin, they totally ruined the night then phoned up my bridesmaids the next day to scream at them and made up a tons opf lies about the whole thing to MrH. Mr H had to put up with me bawling the whole next day and my parents askign me to re consider marrying into the family. It was a fucking terrible experiance and I dearly wish I had not had a hen night.

What I'm trying to say is if you can't afford it, tell her and don't go. Believe me, there is nothing worse than soemone agreeing to come then turning into scrooge McScrooge when they get there as they've suddenly realised it will cost.

(as an aside MrHs cousin thought Lunch "would be prvided" and wanted me to reimburse her tube travel card for the day. I wish i could stab her. hard.)

Since when does the bride organise her own hen night?!?

I thought that was the job of the MOH.

I organised mine, but then I am a control freak.?

I'm not sure why several replies have mentioned 'the current climate' - I think 500 quid is a lot in any economic climate!! I went out for a meal, locally. I knew the girls would insist on covering my meal, so I made sure I paid in advance for enough wine/champagne (and I don't even drink!)

MrMG has just announced a night away for a friend's 40th. I don't care about the money, it's his to spend. But they're going to find somewhere abroad, fly out Sat, back Sun. I just don't see the point. More time driving to airports, waiting, needless expense... it's not like they're sightseeing when they're there! That's on the heels of a stag do in Warsaw - again, chosen because 'let's go abroad'. OK, fine - but why not pick the cheapest place for that weekend, if it's only 'abroad' that matters, and you're just drinking? Flights are nearly 200, and there are loads of cheaper flights same weekend to other cities in Eastern Europe. I should stop ranting really, as they can all afford it... as I say, it's not the money - it's just this 'culture' of 'must get p*ssed overseas'. Do not see the point!! <killjoy>

i was just thinking this. i'm another one who thinks it out of order to expect your friends to stump up that kind of money and use their holiday entitlement for your hen do. and then again for the wedding.

or maybe i'm just saying that as i don't have enough mates who'd pay that, and then stand in leeds bradford airport wearing tshirt saying 'lucious lucy' or 'kinky karen' and penis shaped deely boppers. <sulks>

As i ve said lots of times, the amount is relative. 500 quid is a lot to some people, and peanuts to others. the figure is irrelevant, its whether you can afford it and want to do it which is what matters.

hold on though, a i just said, i know people who if i aid we re going away for a weekend and its 500 quid they wouldnt go on the basis that the hotel would unlikely be nice enough compared to what theyre used to, so its swings and roundabouts.

my objection to them is that they seem to be a fashion more than anything else. lets face it, if you want to go away with your mates, just go. it doesnt have to be on a hen/stag basis. int he same vein as valentines day, just do it whenever.