Anyone else getting married/or married in Barbados?

Didn't get married in Barbados, but have holidayed there, loved it, great country and very laid back friendly people. We stayed at Crystal Cove Hotel. Not sure if this helps but just wanted to say its a fabulous place and I wish I could afford to go back there. x

Thanks Millie, that really helps. My h2b dad is from Barbados and he has loads family there, so we always knew we would get married there It looks beautiful and I have never been to the Caribbean so I am very excited to have our wedding and honeymoon there.

xxx

Aw you will love it. Ive been to the Caribbean a few times (different islands) and if there is a "true" Caribbean island then Barbados is it. Its just perfect. I felt instantly at home there. Oh I wish I could go back!!! lol x

We're seriously considering it but haven't booked yet, we're thinking of either crystal cove hotel or the sandals resort but we've been told it's being refurbished. Just waiting on my sister to confirm if she's coming as she hasd kiddies so won't be able to book the sandals if she comes.

Hi.

Yea they are closing it april til dec for 65 million pound refurbishment as they took it over from couples, that's why we got a good deal with 40% off. There customer care is excellent, and as they have deals we got all our fees for legalities and basic wedding included in our 10 night stay. Its pretty straight forward, and found out as its all legal in Barbados you don't need anything from uk to get married. they arrange all docs before which you fax/scan and then they take you to the official to get the licence to marry.

But yes no kids. When do you plan on getting married? Im not getting married till august 2015, but we had to book to know exactly what it will cost. The flights come out 10/11 months before so sandals will add them on when they are available. yay a fellow Barbados bride, you have to update me as to how you get on. xxx

Thanks Millie, I feel so excited I know I normally go to Spain on holiday due to expense, but as its our honeymoon included I think its worth it.

Hows your planning coming along?

xxx

I will do, we were intending on march 2015 but I'm wondering if we should put it back until later in the year. I keep having guilty pangs that I'm asking my family to fork out so much & I doubt my sister will be able come as she will have two kiddies so will cost her a small fortune. We are only inviting our parents & siblings

Have you had any pangs of guilt about your guest list?

Hi,

Well we are going just the two of us, and as my h2b dad is from Barbados he will attend with my h2b uncle and they will be our two witnesses, so we are basically doing a runner lol. As his uncle lives there, and his dad stays with him, they can easily come to the wedding. But if this was not the case we literally were going to have just the two of us, it just works out nice that family will witness our wedding and not strangers :_

To give you some background I have 5 siblings so I do know what you mean. My lovely sister has 3 kids, and so she would never be able to come, but as she knows why we are doing it she is really happy for us. My other sister is also lovely and she is also happy and is going to make my hen special even though she could have afforded to have come, but I have another sister who I have not told yet, as she is awkward and we don't get on and I can imagine I will have to hear so moaning from her, as again she could have afforded it.

But basically only two of my sisters could afford it and the rest, including my mum and dad would not come anyway. So for my part of the family I had to decide that if they could not all be there, we would make it easier for everyone and not invite anyone...if that makes sense. This was not the only reason but this relates to what you just said about guilt.

Yes I do feel a bit sad they wont be there, but I just can not afford the wedding we want in the uk, so I refuse to compromise my wedding just so others can be there. I know that's not how everyone would see it, but it just suits me.

Me and my h2b have agreed, its us that will be looking at the wedding pics and celebrating our anniversary each year, no one else, so why stress about them not coming , when ultimately it wont matter to anyone after the event an in years to come, but it will matter to us that we had the day we wanted.

I have just been confident in how I have approached select family with it, and when it comes to me telling the rest, I will stick by my guns and state 'it our day, the way we want it so we are happy with our choice'. Don't know if this helps you at all. We were very headstrong on what we wanted and so there was no room for anyone to change our mind. I think for you it depends on if its the wedding you both want. If it is, then go for it, be positive and all will work out. Also my family is not normal lol so if you have a lovely family I can completely see how it could be really difficult for you.

What does your h2b want and are you considering a cheaper destination wedding or a uk wedding if your family cant do barbados? xx

My OH is very keen on getting married abroad & in fact we both are. It's probablyan unusual way to look at but but we both resent the idea of spending thousands on just one day, particularly because neither of us actually want a "wedding". We did look at venues in the UK, basically to keep my mum happy but for the price we were willing to pay there was nothing to our liking. & there's no way we would have been able to afford a honeymoon.it's probably slightly wonky but our priorities were to get married & have a holiday!

Sorry to hear some of your family members are being awkward, i can imagine thats quite hard. We were actually only going to inviteour parents but my mum has kicked up a bit of a stink about not inviting my siblings. I didn't want them to feel obligated to come knowing they couldn't afford it ( itll cost my sister &her family about £7k because there's so many of them) but I was told under no uncertain terms that I was being hurtful & out of order. I'm definitely frustrating myself because I am normally quite headstrong but getting married seems to have turned me into a people-pleasing wuss. Lol.

I think secretly my mum wants us to have a lavish wedding like my sister but it's just not our bag.

I could certainly use a leaf out of your book. Also I hadn't looked at that way about the pictures etc - I must remember that

Hi Kate

It seems you both know what you want, its just that you are worried about your family and how they will afford it, and possibility that they could not attend.

I think you should really follow your heart on this one. There are so many things in life we compromise on, which is good and of course its a positive to look after others, and take their feelings into account. Saying that I think most ladies on here will confirm that no matter what you do, they will always be someone who is unhappy with something.

This is the most exciting day of your life, and I think I get from you that you are both more comfortable doing it away from UK, where there is not much pressure and you can just enjoy your weddingmoon, and while that is not for everyone, its def for me and my h2b.

We just want to get married and enjoy a lovely 10 night holiday, that to be honest we would never normally save for. We are private people and to be honest we are not fussed on all the attention thing.

When I went for a dress fitting on Saturday it really hit home that we were doing this alone (as the dress people make you bring out all aspects of your wedding so you can find the right dress) and for the first time I really relished in the thought of our little ceremony and just how we are as a couple. We will be laughing, drinking and generally having fun, and this is how we are in life and so it is right for us. I know other people will not agree, but really it depends on what you want. This is the one time in life you can really chose how things go. Like I said in years to come, you will both be celebrating each year in how your day was and what it meant to you. As my h2b said, our families wont be sat on the sofa next to us each year...lol.

I know what you mean as one of my sisters who is married had a big wedding thing, and we were all there and I was a bridesmaid, and it was so lovely I can see why my family would wonder why I would not want that. But I don't, its too political and too expensive (for the day I want). She is so happy for me and she completely understands, even though she and her daughters and son wont be included. That's love for you I think. when someone really sees it from your view and accepts it.

My advise would be that once you have made your choice whatever it be, make sure you fully accept it within yourself before you speak to others. Don't doubt your choice as family will sense it and will go on and on in the hope of changing your mind.

If you are confident and loving in how you tell them, if they can afford to come or not, I think they will respect your choice. This is as we cant expect others to respect what we are telling them, if we don't fully accept it too. if that makes sense. This is why I am very confident in my choice, regarding my family. Its right for me so no matter what they say I say 'I know and I understand but we are happy with what we are doing', this leaves no room for them to try and change my mind (not that they can as we have booked it now) however my mum always said that if I got married in Barbados (as we have always said we would) that she wants me to have a party when we get back so she can be mother of the bride..lol To which I always said we would not (again money and attention we don't want), and she never accepted that, so when I tell her that I have booked it, I am sure she will go on about it. But I will stand my ground and in a loving way explain that its not going to happen.

Does this help at all, sorry if my email went on sooooo long...lol

Looking forward to hearing how you get on. x

I bet you are so excited! I would be too....so jealous!! lol. Definitely worth it too...sandals are a great company to go with, I went to their resort in Varadero in Cuba and they were fantastic.

My plans are near enough sorted now, four weeks to go and we just have a couple of things to pay and that's it! Not sorting a honeymoon until after the wedding as we aren't going to go till May, and we had a bit of a hiccup about that, if you read the "have relationships changed since becoming engaged" thread then you will know why lol x

Ahhh thanks for pep talk Fenty123, I think i'll be fine once we've booked it as least then there's no going back.

Hope you're wedding plans continue to go well. xx

Ahhh thanks for pep talk Fenty123, I think i'll be fine once we've booked it as least then there's no going back.

Hope you're wedding plans continue to go well. xx

Gutted! Sandals is closed until April 15! We were hoping for March :-( xx

Hi Kate,

Hows your planning coming. Have you found anywhere yet? xx

Hi Fenty123,

There's not really been any progress (hangs head in shame!), my mum has asked that we consider changing the date to Mid April (although I actually think she meant location too) as March is the high season & barely any of the family can afford to go at that time so are having to get extra quotes.

On bright side, if we make it later, Sandals might just be open!!

how's your planning coming?

Hi,

Ok keep me updated. I think a lot of the hotels on the island do weddings and so you may even find a better deal in another hotel. Just think what ever is meant to be with be perfect for you and your h2b.

Did sandals say exactly when they are open I heard it was January 15 so they must have extended it to refurb.

Currently I am wedding dress shopping. I have been to two shops so far and have an appointment for one on Saturday. I have not even come close to finding 'the dress' yet lol. But this is the perk of planning early, I have months to find what I want. All shops so far have said that the dress takes about 6 months to be made, so that leaves plenty of time. Other than that I am stalking my wedding countdown app on my phone lol. Just gone from 17 months plus down to 16 months plus lol.

xx

Millie,

I only just saw your post. this is fenty123 just changed my username to Miss Lola.

OMG you only have 22 days to go. How exciting!!! How are you feeling? Are you all organised now. Not seen that thread so will check it out now lol.

xxx

I cant see that thread I think I am still getting the hang of using this forum lol