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I don't think it's you, sounds like your people aren't being the most helpful!

Are the groomsmen being asked to pay for the suits? If so, maybe it's a budget thing? If you're paying, then frankly, they should get on with it. I would tell them that their opinion is welcomed, and you obviously don't want them to be uncomfortable, but seriously, how bad can a suit be?! Sounds like you've handled that one pretty well.

Same with the bridesmaids - if you have paid for the dresses yourself, and they were happy with them at first, why the sudden change of heart? If they don't like it, they can wear what they like - as a regular guest. Has she put on weight or something? I feel for her, but that's not really your fault. I'm being bridesmaid for a friend this year, and I wouldn't dream of demanding a different dress.

I don't think that you can really stop people bringing their own snacks, but maybe tell them that as you're paying for however much a head, it would be very rude of them to bring snacks and not eat the food you provide. Are their any 'non-eaters' that you can relegate to evening do?

Why are your parents taking your niece and nephew there? Is it a kid's event on, or just a random day trip? Maybe ask if they can postpone it if so?

If not, it's a shame, but it will be done up differently on your wedding day, and will seem a lot more personal to them then anyway.

Maybe just keep the rest of your wedding plans secret, and tell your family it's a surprise. If your parents are hinting that they have contributed so therefore get a say, maybe have a frank conversation and say you're grateful for their help, but are they expecting to have a say in certain things. If they are, perhaps agree what their contribution is going towards and let them have input on that?

Good luck! X

Everything you have said seems reasonable, apart from the snacks