A little question about speeches

We're giving an hour for speeches.

Many people think that's far too long but in my mind long speeches are only a problem if they are boring - people won't notice how long a good speech is.

We're having Father of the Bride / Groom / Bride / Mother of the Bride (although the latter two will only be very short) and finally the Best Man.

It's not the quantity of the speeches that matter, it's the quality, and the overall time - I know my b2b's "speech" will only be a couple of minutes because that's all she wants to do, so it'll hardly affect the overall timings.

What I've read in another thread is to do the speeches in between courses - so could you do two before starter, two in between starter and main and two before dessert?

That sounds like a lot to me... We had FOB, Groom and BM in half an hour. I personally think keep it short or spread them out throughout the dinner.

Good speech or not, I would be getting a bit antsy after an hour of listening!

Personally i would be bored if i had to sit through an hour of speeches. We have only allowed for 15 minutes. My Dad is a man of few words and my OH's mom is doing one. Apart from that we are both just going to say a few words of thanks to our guests but thats it.

My speech alone is at least 12 minutes before adding in what my then new wife, and my mother, wish to say.

Maybe it is 'too long' but it's my chance to take the spotlight for a little bit and I'm gonna make the most of it.

I have two thoughts- yes 1 hour is too long for speeches. I have been to loads of weddings, and even funny/interesting speeches get boring after a while. People get fidgety.

The second thought is, if it's your daughter's wedding, I don't really think it's up to you to say anything... if you do you will need to be subtle. I wouldn't like it if my mum said she didn't think an aspect of my wedding was a good idea.

Yes, but I got the impression that the bride had already spoken about this- else how would her mum know how long the speeches will be...

I think that the MOB obviously feels strongly about it for her to come on here and ask a load of randomers- perhaps she should have just asked the bride, "oooh, do you think that will work?"...

I could have got the whole situation wrong of course, and if so I apologise.... just the impression that I got.

I don't think an hour is too long. Everyone is different.

But I would consider if there are any young children giving them colouring books or something else to keep them amused because I know my little boy(4) would definitely find it hard to keep quiet for that long.

Good point, I hadn't considered the kitchens!!!

It just seems a bit interfering IMO... i.e. "I think it would be a bad idea to have an hour of speeches at my daughter's wedding, rather than speak to her about it, I will go onto Hitched and ask them first. THEN I will speak to her."

I think I would be annoyed if my mum came on here and asked this about my wedding. Still that's me. I don't really like being told what to do by my mum ?.

I don't lump it in the same category as asking opinions on colours, themes or asking where to source certain items. I have not read other posts by other hitcher's regarding their offspring's wedding, so I can't comment on those really.

We've 'allocated' 45mins for the speeches and we've got my Dad, OH and Best Man giving a speech. My Bridesmaid (wife of the best man and OH's sister) is also going to be giving a little speech / poem about when they were children etc as the Best Man didn't know OH then.

My Dad is a man of very few words, so his will be short. OH likes public speaking so will probably do a decent length speech. We didn't want the speech-giver feeling rushed or pressured so we allocated a slightly longer time that perhaps we need.

I think its really up to your daughter and her OH, clearly it means something to them if they have already said that that many people are doing a speech. I think with all due respect, it's not really your place to say, some people like long speechs, some people don't, its purely a personal preferance. She likes long speechs and you would prefer shorter ones.

If the bride and groom are happy with it-well it's their day!

I'm marrying in Sweden -where lots of speeches and schnapps songs are traditional so we're staggering them -Dad and Groom at beginning then best man, my best friend at end of meal.However apparantly anyone just gets up and gives a speech thorughout the night so have a Swedish mate to be MC to coordiante and introduce.Oh and folkband and Schnapps song words on hand

Ooh caused a bit of a debate here! I am co ordinating the wedding so am very involved and am consulting the couple all of the way. They have said they don't really know much about weddings so ask for advice so I passed it on to you on here to find out. thanks for opinions, will consider them all.