A pondering about fussy eaters

I don't consider myself a fussy eater however H thinks I am.

As for your wedding meal. Have what you and your H2B want as you will never be able to keep everyone happy, even with chicken.

I agree with WL, you'll never please everyone. If word gets out that you're having, for example, lamb (a perfectly reasonable choice) those that don't like it can play at being veggie. IMO I would cook chicken at home regularly so wouldn't have it for my wedding dinner. No doubt you'll be paying a fortune for it so chose something you'll enjoy, not that everyone will eat.

I always watch that Freaky Eaters on BBC in amazement that grown people live on crisps/ sandwiches/ plain pasta or whatever and retch at the sight of an orange.

(edited as I can't spell)

We did lamb, they served it slightly pink and we got no complaints. I'd love it if someone had the good taste to serve rabbit.

Our one token vegetarian sent her crudité based starter back without even touching it, which I thought was the very height of rudeness. Thankfully my mate has since divorced her.

Mmmm - i think for a wedding i would want everyone (as far as possible) to just be able to relax and enjoy

i dont like the idea of the super conservative basically a sunday roast menus that some people feel they have to have to accommodate everyone - but would probably steer clear of things i know lots of people could be wary of

but really i think i would make my choices based on how well i thought the venue could cater for the number of guests and still get it really right - eg i wouldnt want to go for short order type fare if i had a stack of guests eg steaks where they would struggle to get them all cooked how people wanted them

there is a lot to be said for just having what makes you happy - but for the food bit you have asked these people to share and enjoy your day and i wouldnt be too left field about the menu

We chose our wedding meal with us and my Mum (who was paying) in mind. We decided on a caesar salad with optional chicken, roast sirloin of beef with dauphinoise potatoes & veg and a chocolate tart. We asked 3 close veggie friends to choose their main meal and they unanimously decided on a leek & roquefort tart. We then made it clear on our info sheet that we were serving beef and that a veg options was available which a couple of people chose who aren't usually veggie.

Most weddings we've been to the food has been very good and TBH we've been happy with a free meal!

We had chicken mainly for this reason. Although its up to you what you want, I didnt want the worry if people didnt like it and was alot happier knowing most people would be happy with this. I think you should be fine with most meats beef, lamb, pork altho would prob avoid rabbit or lesser known meats.

I did feel alot happier knowing everyone was enjoying the food.

I have no issue at all with those who have allergies. i cannot bear fussy eaters. it actually puts me off a person if i know they dont eat vegetables/fruit or similar nonesense. at our wedding we had rare roast beef, monkfish, tiger prawns, scallops, various oher fish and shellfish. those who didnt want any single thing, or all as far as i m concerned could bugger off. however, since they were all family or friends, none of whom are fussy eaters at all, there was no issue. i d never pander to it. its their weirdness as far as i m concerned, and as long as you know the bulk or your audience will be fine, thats definitely good enough for me.

Oooh that's reassuring! That was one of my other concerns. I prefer meat closer to alive than cremated but again I know how funny people can be about that.

I am very tempted by rabbit. We'd quite like something a bit springy and quite local (Welsh) so we'll have to see what the chef can come up with. I had a gorgeous starter once that was a take on a Welsh breakfast. Bara law, cockles, bacon and black pudding (obviously not a huge amount but it was wonderful!) we're getting married in Swansea so I think it'd be a nice touch.

I'm glad your friend saw the light! Did he cite that incident in the divorce at all?

I think I would pick something that is likely to be enjoyed by the majority. Mainly because I wouldn't want my hard earned cash being wasted on meals that people haven't ate.

We went for chicken for the main dish.. it was lovely and no one passed on it.. (apart from the vegetarians who we knew about before)

I can't remember what the grounds were. Probably the fact that she looked like a chubby teenaged boy.

Your menu ideas sound ace - can I come? ?

Oooh an interesting mix of opinions!

That's another thing I've been thinking about but probably in an overly analytical way. If I reduce the meals purely down to money would I prefer that a smaller percentage (including myself, husband and close family members) really enjoyed or a larger percentage thought it was ok. I think my brain is actually in the process of developing an equation for it, I'm not even the mathematician in the family!

I may be overthinking this...

I will eat anything or at least try it if someone has cooked for me.

i know i dont like rabbit so i wouldnt eat that and the reason for that is i had a bad rabbit dish years ago and the though of it makes me heave also chicken kiev apart from those i dont thnk there is anything i wont try

sounds lovely mwnc are u putting some out in the night too ?

Depends, what present would you get us? (It's the night of France vs Wales but it'll be on in one of the bars or a meeting room, it was a condition of us booking that venue - or rather a condition of some people attending, harrumph)

I've no idea what we're having in the evening, any requests? You are totally invited btw! (despite just asking bgb I'm honestly not inviting just anyone!)

I don't think I could get married on the day of a Wales match. That's very brave of you. I have a tendency to get unnecessary. I was out in Egypt for the final match of the 6 nations and couldn't find anywhere showing it. I spent £30 on data updates through my mobile phone and still cheered like a loon when Wales won ?

I know you already told me i have to come ?

ooh anything after a day in work i would eat the dust off the floor when i have had a drink ?

We're playing in Paris so it's not quite so bad, I don't think it would have been a go-er if we were at home. Himself is currently attempting to plan the honeymoon so we end up in Rome on the 14th of March....

Well done him , i am watching the rugby at the mo very emotional night but we r whipping their butts

Hey they'd better not have any dust on the floor! Heads will roll! hehe. I should imagine there'll be a fair few crushed Swarovski crystals mind.

We pretty much chose what we liked the best from the choices avaliable, but I am a bit fussy so it ruled out most things people would object to. We had french onion soup (a friends OH asked what cheese on toast was doing in his gravy ?) roast fore rib of beef with veg and yorkshires and profiteroles.

I would eat lamb if served at a wedding but not at home, I would try the rabbit but probably wouldnt be able to eat it if I didnt like it.

I do think spending a fortune on food people wont eat is a waste but you shouldnt have something that you dont really want either. So its a tough choice I think.

As if you'd notice and i doubt it at your venue [posh tart really aint ya ]?

You definitely can't please everyone, but I think I'd choose something that I thought the majority of my guests would enjoy. Yes, it is 'your' day, but unless you are spending it just by yourselves on a remote island, then you are actually asking people to put themselves out and pay out for attending 'your' day so the minimum (I) would do is to try and select an meal that I thought would go down well.

You know your own guests - if they are the type to enjoy rabbit, or 'exotic fayre' ?, then fantastic - go for it.. If, however, you're not sure that most people do eat rabbit, then I would say choose something more mainstream. I'm surprised you define a non-rabbit eater as 'fussy'. I've never tried rabbit and I really don't want to... I also haven't tried snails or frogs legs etc. because I don't want to, but I eat chicken, lamb, beef, pork, shellfish etc. and have never thought of myself as 'fussy'... I would consider rabbit to be a slightly odd choice on a restricted menu, and if that were presented to me as the only option at a wedding I would be peeved.

< Aside... I don't actually think the food turns out to be that important overall anyway... irrespective of what menu you choose, mass catering at most venues is rarely brilliant, so I prefer the wine to be good and copius and I generally find that makes me happy >

We knew no-one had allergies and there were a couple of vegetarians, so then we just went with what we liked and a veggie option. And if guests didn't like it then tough. There was no way I was giving people a say or even told them what it was (except family/friends that I was chatting about the wedding with of course) in advance of the day as you'd always get people moaning about something. And even if they didn't like what we had (beef) they could have eaten the rest of the meal and just left the meat so they'd hardly have starved.

I don't mind veggies or people with allergies (as long as I know about them in advance so can accommodate them) but I find fussy eaters a total PITA and don't have any time for them I'm afraid.

Having said that I don't know that I'd pick something that there was a risk a lot of people wouldn't like eg rabbit or fish. But I certainly wouldn't be trying to please everyone.

I too have been amazed by the type and extent of fussiness. I thought my sister's boyfriend was bad being a meat and 2 veg no frills (so no sauces or garnish) person but he at least eats vegetables and he's getting better about trying things (mainly because my Mum uses her headteacher skills to force him to do this!)

It does seem to be something that's increasing and perhaps it's a sign of a more me me me world IYSWIM. It's gone from being impolite for a guest to issue restrictions to it being impolite for a host not to accomodate them. I also can't help but attribute it to parents pandering to their children more.

As for the wedding food issue, it's your wedding and guests really should accept that and I don't mean just about food.

How do you define a fussy eater?

for me its someone who sits there and refuses to try things just because they dont like the look of it and doesnt give anything a chance , obviously there are some things you wont like but i think people should try them

when i met gary he didnt like any veg apart from peas now he eats it all he was fussy because his mum let him be whereas i throw it on the plate and say eat or starve

he even eats sprouts now but i dont force the roast parsnips on him as there are more for me lol

Just to clarify I don't define a non rabbit eater as fussy necessarily although it can't do any harm to try it, I know rabbits are cute and fluffy but so are lambs! I fully accept that people like different things but I really don't understand when people wont even try something. May I could convert lots of people to rabbit because they'll have to eat it or go hungry.

The fussiness was really referring to the spate of posts today about fussy eater house guests, I just can't believe some people are so fixed when it comes to what they will or wont eat.

This is my thoughts on it too (including the roast parsnips!)

ps I don't really care about dust, if you'd seen my house you'd know this!

We decided that as it could become a minefield of trying to please everyone but ending up with something rubbish, that we would have what we wanted, which was beef fillet served medium rare.

We made exceptions for the vegetarians and asked for well-done portions for the pregnant women and MrH's dad, because he was going to be sat on our table and we didn't want him to eat nothing. AFAIK everyone enjoyed it - they all commented on how good hte food was.

I do agree that people should have the opportunity to try things, but preferably when there's another choice available. I think there's a world of difference between mainstream eaters and people who are genuinely restrictive about food.

I also like dust ?

?you should see mine