A question for (not just) atheists...

Oh I so would. I think it would be super-rude not to want to attend a ceremony as it didn't adhere to your beliefs.

I'm a Jewish athiest, who accidentally married a Catholic!

We had a civil ceremony, attended by a load of french catholics, a load of jewish people, English CofEs, muslims, hindu, sikh and even one buddist, and I'm sure a shedload of athiests!

Being invited to a wedding is about celebrating the two people coming together, no matter their faith of lack of!

I would go of course- I am there to celebrate my loved ones marriage and how they choose to do it is up to them.

I do feel awkward at a church wedding though- especially when asked to pray and to ask God to help my friends in their marriage etc. Not that the couple would ever know though.

Yea I would.... I know lot of my friends have attended muslim weddings where they have worn saris not drunk alcohol or eat pork (as none was served obviously) but not thought anything

I think most people will have respect for other peoples beliefs even if they don't share them.

I don't believe in religion but I have no problem with other peoples beliefs. I do feel a little uncomfortable in church but only because I don't say the amen bits or the prayers and I worry that people will think badly of me. I look at weddings as a commitment to each other, its a couple's personal choice as to whether or not they involve their beliefs.x

Of course I still go, I'm there to support my friends. I do feel a bit awkward during the prayers as I don't say them. I do enjoy singing the hymns though.

Yes I would definitely attend a church wedding that I'm invited to regardless of my lack of belief. I won't have a religious ceremony myself but it doesn't mean that I won't respect other people's faith. For me being an atheist just means that I don't choose to follow a particular religion, it doesn't mean that I'm against it.

Will you come to my wedding? I'm worried no one will sing ?

I'm atheist and Ive been to loads of Catholic weddings. To be honest I get bored in the communion and religious bits and always feel a daft twat when I have no idea what they are going on about but I am there to see my friends (mostly OH family for the catholic weddings) get married and that is what matters most to me.

I wore a sari at my BM's Muslim wedding (I'm a Jewish agnostic) and loved joining in and experiencing something different, it wouldn't even have occured to me to feel uncomfortable at other people expressing beliefs I don't share. Any atheist who doesn't want to go a friend or loved one's wedding because it's religious needs to get their priorities in order.

My partner and I are not religious, but believe there is an after life of sorts. We would happily attend a friends wedding, even if it was in a church, but we do not join in as such with prayers etc. We recently attended a friends, son's christening and a friends, daughters 1st holy communion. We refused to say any of the prayers or lines, as we do not go to church and worship/follow/have a faith and thought it would be hypocritical to join in. I suppose we felt we wanted to go out, of respect for the person for inviting us and to support them at the same time.

I go to religious weddings. I stand and I sit as necessary, but I never kneel. I also never sing nor say the prayers (one exception to the 'no singing' rule, beause it was a funny song). To be honest, I don't enjoy them as much as others, but manage to spend any godly bits counting windows or something. I was a church wedding in June, seated next to a list of all the parish vicars since 1236. I'd calculated their average age at death by the end of the service.

We're not religious either but this would not put us off going to any sort of religious ceremony. I'll join in with the Hymns (if I know them) but won't say the prayers. As mini said, I do feel a little odd being in a church when it isn't what I believe,but it wouldn't stop me going-at the end of the day if someone thinks enough of you to invite you , it shouldn't really be an issue x

I'm the same as FTLOMB. I'd go but not say the prayers etc..

I work for a Jewish company, only one of the ladies I've talked to wouldn't go to a church or other religious wedding.

I'm the same as FTLOMB. I'd go but not say the prayers etc..

I work for a Jewish company, only one of the ladies I've talked to wouldn't go to a church or other religious wedding.

ahhh Jewish Agnostic - I like that! I describe myself as Jewish Athiest, which some people really seem to have a problem with *meh*

is yor partner/hubby jewish?

x

We had a full Catholic mass, lots of our friends are atheists, they still came. They just didn't take c ommunion, join in with the prayers etc. I think if you are friends/love someone you will go and see them get married regardless of your beliefs.

We are not any religion, but are happy to go to any wedding as we are there for the people not the religiious aspect. I do get bored in catholic weddings sometimes though, but would never show it! We went to a Sikh wedding a few years ago and it was really interesting. Amazing food!

I think you'd have to be pretty arrogant to refuse to go to a wedding because you didn't share religous beliefs....

Pretty much wss, I always feel uncomfortable in church.

When it comes to prayers etc I stay silent.

I'm not religious at all and find churches quite creepy but I make exceptions for weddings (and funerals). Like others have said, I feel a bit awkward during the more religious parts, although I do sing the hymns even though I don't agree with the words but that probably applies to most pop songs I'd sing along to as well!

As much as I'm anti religion (I wouldn't say atheist - more agnostic), I'd hate to think people would avoid inviting me to their wedding because of that. The important thing to me is the couple who are getting married - IMO it shouldn't matter what you believe or how you want to get married, the people who care about you should embrace it! ?

Oh I'd never not invite anyone. And to be honest, I think he'd still come to the wedding.

I just wondered if there was anyone who has beliefs that strong that they'd refuse to go to a religious wedding.

My H is atheist and still goes to church weddings. He tries to sing, but doesn't usually say the prayers. I love church weddings. ?

Interestingly, though, when we went to a friend's extremely Bible-based evangelical service, he found it less awkward than I did. I was sat with a couple of friends who are also liberal Christians and feminists, and we were quietly seething all the way through the sermon. OH wasn't bothered though, and said "Well at least he actually preached rather than just saying some wishy-washy generic stuff"

I'm Catholic and went to a friend's wedding recently. She is Muslim and they had a civil ceremony but then a Muslim blessing which I thought was great to see. I wouldn't have missed it for the world, and as the others have said it's about the committment the couple are making,regardless of religion.x

Maybe, maybe not. I know people who refuse to attend Catholic ceremonies in protest against the Catholic church, not anything to do with the couple.

Yeah I have to say I thought I was the only Jew in the Hitched village until I saw your post! My belief in a higher power regularly varies, but I definitely don't believe in any religion's interpretation of God that currently exists. I went to a Jewish high school for 7 years, that was enough to put me off religion for life!

OH's mum is Jewish so technically he is, but he had absolutely no religious upbringing. I have to say I never thought I would marry a Jewish man, my best friend from high school finds it hilarious that I am! Were your parents/family OK about you marrying a Catholic? I know some people whose parents wouldn't come to the wedding if they didn't marry a Jew ?

I had a Catholic Education (in a convent school) and wouldn't go up for mass. I did sing and say prayers, even if I didn't believe there was a God listening. I still don't believe but I now respect (and admire) those who are commited to any belief. I would love to go to a wedding ceremony of another religion as I have never experienced that and would find it fascinating. I would be suprised if I wasn't invited to a ceremony because I didn't share the belief as our country is so multi-denominational. I now say prayers and sing hymns at weddings etc as I think that although I may not believe it will do anything, it shows that I support the bride and groom and want to share in celebrating their marriage. This is just how I see it and I understand those who choose not to do this (as I still wouldn't take communion at a Catholic mass).

You need me and OH (plus a few of our wedding party). Always bellowing out hymns...although not particularly tuneful. Available to rent for a reasonable cost ?

I would go to a ceremony of any faith as I recognise the sentiment is in regards to my friends. One of my volunteering colleagues is a 100% atheist - despises the notion of religion. However, he would attend a marriage, funeral or remembrance parades in a church as the event is important to him.

Ha me too. Maybe there are more? Where are you from?

My parents are totally cool - they just want me to be happy. I always tell them if they wanted me to marry a Jew, they should have brought me up in N London! My mum's from Finchley, but moved to Surrey with my dad, so Surrey born and bred. But they are seriously fantastic and put no pressure on me whatsoever and love Pascal. We are the least religious family you would meet, but it's a cultural thing for me. ha I think my mum would have struggled if I wanted to get marrid in a church, but luckily would never even be an issue!

x

FBILs wedding was a church one and we went. Did feel weird to say the truth and OH who was best man moaned for quite a while about being made to kneel and pray at one point bur he still did it and he inly moaned at me in private.

Its more of an awkward thing where suddenly you are the odd one out and not conforming to the norm, and are being thrown into a situation your not comfortable with ... but I doubt an athiest would be 'against' going as if you dont beleive then there shouldnt be a problem entering the room.

The only way to get my OH into a church is for a birth, death or marriage! He doesn't believe, hence no religious service for us, but he'd never dream of refusing to go to someone else's wedding of any religion to make a point. That seems so extreme and pretty rude. Friends who are teetotal (for religious, personal or health reasons) don't refuse to ever cross the threshold of the pub; they just have a soft drink. I guess I never thought that people would reject an invite over something like this.... although from some posts on here it clearly happens.....

(Btw - one bit of advice is to pick well known hymns that people may have sung at school, even if they aren't church goers now. It can feel a bit odd when there are only a handful of people who know the tune. Hymn books with the music in there rather than just the words also help!)

Going to a church wedding doesn't mean you have to believe in any of it. Quite a few of our friends/family members are atheist but they happily came to our church service. I would be downright offended if any of them had turned down the invite on account of the venue.

I am a complete religion-phobe... not that I don't think anyone else should believe what they want to, just that I don't believe in anything or any organised religion.

I have attended a couple of weddings over the last few years that have been religious, and would not dream of not going! To me it's about celebrating the love my friends feel for eachother and their new life together. I won't, however, be involved in prayers or hymns, I'll just stand there and wait patiently until it's over as I think it would be hypocritical for me to be singing or praying about something I don't believe in.