A WWYD? from an old married...;)

3 years later????

Quite frankly, I'd just ask her outright after all this time, is she going to do it or not? None, of this waiting till it's raining or winter malarkey.

It really doesn't sound like she can be bothered....

I agree with Penny...ask her out-right if she is taking the pi$$ and if something has happened to the footage then just to come out and say it rather than brushing you off.

3yrs is a long time to wait, I think you have been patient too long!, she's not much of a friend to keep you waiting this long ☹️

Thanks both, I think she will just say that she's been too busy and it will happen eventually but she doesn't know when (that's pretty much the reply I've had up to now). I feel like I'm keeping on and getting in the way of her life - she's bought a boat since our wedding and all her time is spent on getting that ready for whatever adventure she and her husband are going on next. Everything else seems to be a priority so my video takes a back seat till she's got nothing else going on!

Oh it's driving me nuts- we were really good friends but everytime one of her statuses comes up on Facebook I feel I want to make some smart comment! xx

Sorry, that is NOT ON. I would definately get the truth out of her...... make up some lie about being desperate to see the footage, or perhaps you're great aunt beryl whos really desp to see it

I'm sorry thats happened to you. Goodluck.

Thanks, I think I've tried all the excuses - only one left is the straight out 'are you going to do it at all?', like Penny said...don't relish the idea though - I know it'll get her back up cos she will do it 'at some point' and just has many more important things to do right now... x

What a shame!

A similar thing happened to friends of mine. They booked a mutual friend as their photographer (he is/was a 'professional' just not that used to doing weddings). Eventually after two years they got the proofs that they could print from, apparently they were not that great.

Bit of a slippy character as a couple of months later he moved out of a friend's flat he was renting (said friend lived at the other end of the country) and 'forgot' to tell her. Cue angry council tax and utility company letters. Not something you do to a friend!

I'd be really hacked off if I were you, but I understand it's difficult as she is your pal and no money was paid. Perhaps a subtle comment on one of her 'bored - nothing to do' updates would work, although she sounds pretty flaky to me.

To be absolutely honest it sounds like she can't be arsed, it's certainly not a priority for her.

How about just asking her for the raw unedited footage then after viewing decide if it's worth hiring a pro-videographer type person to edit it for you, or if not that great, you might just want to spend £50 on a bit of software and edit it yourelf over a couple of weeks in the evening when the kids are in bed.

That's minimal effort from here, if she can't be arsed to stick it in the post then tbh, I'd have to reconsider re-rating her from friend to aquaintance

Sadly, this is a really common story when asking friends and relatives to do stuff rather than hiring somebody who does it as a living, I'm sure you aren't the first and you definitely won't be the last. Hope you manage to get something sorted.

Hi Brian, (you did our lovely wedding photos!)

I know, I didn't originally want a videographer on the day but when she offered I thought it would be a nice idea and it would help her out too. She manages to take photos and things that she wants to do (and things that probably don't take a long time) but just hasn't got round to doing our video.

I am starting to go the way of demoting her to acquaintance, but she and her husband were really great friends to us and i've known her a long time. I'll ask for the unedited version though, hadn't really thought of that. I think she wanted to edit it though as she did quite a lot of arty stuff with the filming...x

Oh Hi Claire, didn' realise it was you!

Unedited by the answer, it takes very little time to stick it in the post and there isn't really any reason she can't do that quite quickly for you.

Well I'm asking her for the unedited version but re-reading her last email it seems that she is planning to send me the unedited one anyway (says it will be faster) - i'm drafting a message back but I'm thinking this may not be the best time as I've had quite a lot of wine this evening...

I've just read what I've written and no, it's probably not the best time ;D

How are you and the new arrival (not so new now probably)? x

Well have sent her a mainly factual (though wine-fuelled but that might be a good thing) message. Going to bed now before I find the courage to tell other people some home truths!

Thanks all xx

ClaireB Im a bit late for this tread - so now just want to know how it went for you....

but for the record - I think its completely out of order, 3 years!!! that's so officially taking the piss! I would try and get the raw material off her asap if she still has it - if you give it to someone to edit you will have the finished DVD in no time (compared to waiting even more - until when?). The fact you didn't pay her is not important really - if you commit to doing something, especially for a friend, you have to honor that commitment - money or no money.

Good, and new one is now 3.5 years old, chats for England and we've just started her latin and ballroom dance training...not that we are pushy parents or anything!

I would email her asking if she could simply send you the raw footage and then get someone else to edit it if need be. H's aunty ran off with some of the disposable cameras we had layed on the tables saying she was going to get them developed. 6 years on we are still waiting... I'm not bothered though, the ones we did get developed ourselves were full of silly rubbish, so I doubt I am missing much.

Brian - oh she's gorgeous! I love the fairy outfit! Wow doesn't time fly.

I did send my friend a message on Friday night and it was surprisingly not too rude... I did just say that I would like the raw footage as it had been 3 years unless she was going to sort it out soon. She apologised for it being that long and said she would send me the whole lot on the tapes. She's done it on a Sony camera though I think so not sure how to get it off without buying a camera...!

Thanks all for your ideas, Not sure what I'll do with the footage now though - better start learning! xx