Advice please - guest list trouble!

I would just upset the MIL (although I'd probably be cowardly and get OH to talk to her). It's not her place to go inviting people, and it's your day so you need to make sure it's how you want it to be.

.

Mil expected half the entire guest list would be hers? So if she had half the guests and your parents had half the guests where would your guests fit?!

As someone else said, if she is paying towards the wedding then you do need to approach with a bit of caution but it still doesn't give her the right to dictate the guest list to that extent.

If she's not contributing, still discuss the guest list with her but you're much more within your rights to completely put your foot down.

What does your OH say?

OH is sitting firmly on the fence...he wants our friends but also doesn't want to deal with the issue.

My parents are planning on paying the majority and have made it clear that it is still our wedding and they are not asking for any of their friends to come unless we ask them ourselves.

Going to look through the list again this evening so hopefully can come to some sort of agreement with OH to take back to MIL when he speaks to her next.

Thanks for the advice...you have all confirmed what I was thinking and that I am not being completely unreasonable in my thinking!

.

Don't compromise on this. Stick to your guns.

My parents paid for most of my wedding and never made any assumptions/comments/demands etc. In laws did give us some money which was gratefully recieved. I had no issues until a few weeks before the wedding when she asked why OHs godparents grown up kids were only coming to the evening do. I told her I was tight on numbers (true) She decided it was a money issue and tried to offer more if they could come all day.

I sat her down and said not only was it offensive to suggest that my father could not afford the extra guests but that OH and myself decided only to invite people we had actually seen recently. Although he was friendly with these grown up kids he never saw them and didn't see why he should invite them.

She tried it one more time and got the same response. TBH we have had a great relationship since and she knows she can't make me do things I don't want to do.

If you cave on this more things will come, she will be trying to influence the food, flowers and god only know what else. Put your foot down!

Duplicate post

Just wanted to say thanks for all your advice!

We have finally sorted it so everyone is happy. MIL has chosen 6 friends, and some more to come in the evening. So we still have room for more of the people we want to be there. ?