Am I being a brat?

MmmI can see why your mum has asked them to stay, but at the same time it is a bit odd. It is her daughter's wedding and so you would expect it to revolve around you - not in a brattish way of course. Can these people not stay in a loval hotel the night before the wedding. I think they will feel uncomfortable surrounded by all the wedding shenanigans and would feel in the way tbh. I know I would.

Well it's your mum's house so she can invite whoever she wants even if it doesn't suit you.

I appreciate that it's annoying, but i think you're going to have to make the best of it rather than worrying. You can still have your friends round and do what you wanted to do. Entertaining the visitors should be down to your mum as she invited them.

Maybe your auntie could come over with your gran the night before the wedding and then you'll still get to see her.

To be honest, I wouldn't be happy if there were lots of people there in the morning when I am getting ready. I think i'd end up screaming at someone who got in the way. I think its quite a personal part of the day and something that I would only want to share with my bridesmaids and my parents. Personally. I also don't want anyone seeing my dress etc until I arrive!

I think though your mum was probably trying to be helpful. If they are travelling from France, its quite a long way and they will either be tired travelling on the same day and/or it may not be practically possible for them particularly being elderly.

Depending on where you are getting married, would it not be possible for them to stay in a hotel/B&B that night? xx

I wouldn't be particularly happy, but i can see why she has invited them if they're elderly and potentially couldn't stay in a b&b like others have said.

I guess the best thing to do is try not to worry about it, maybe set off a certain room in the house if there is a big room that you could stay in, in your dress until these relatives have left for the ceremony? surely they will leave early?

The couple come to visit family members every year and travel around the country for a month. They will probably have been in the country for a week or so beforehand and usually stay in hotels on their travels. They are elderly but fairly fit. Please don't think I'm keen to turf infirm people out onto the street! I understand she is being nice, it's not that I don't want to see them. We just don't have much space, there isn't a spare room for them to be in without them being in a bedroom. I'm just concerned about them feeling awkward because I know I would! You're right about them being my mums responsibility. We won't have enough space for my mum to be with them and for me to have friends over so I could maybe go out somehwere instead to give them some space instead.

Also, thanks for your advice. I am most likely over thinking it, I am sure it doesn't really matter. I will just explain to her i want to be calm in the morning and make sure there is enough space etc!

I think you're taking a lot of responsibility for how they/your mum/your gran will feel. It's not your job to worry about whether they feel awkward or not. That's their problem!

IF they normally stay at a hotel they have made a conscious choice not to do so on this occasion. They are probably very excited about your wedding and want to share as much of it as possible. Maybe not something you're so keen on but just try to see the bright side.

They won't expect you to entertain them (they are presumably married themselves so will have had their own wedding prep to do and know that you won't have much time for them).

i got ready on my wedding day at my BM's and we had to get her neighbour to come round and drop off some white thread as a button came lose on my dress. It didn't bother me at all. She brought her small kiddies with her who were so cute and excited about seeing me in my dress. They were complete strangers and it made absolutely no difference to my day!

Don't fret! it'll be totally fine and you may even enjoy their excitement.

I would be very of put if my mum did that.

Again not to sound like a brat but why would you want people you hardly see there with you in the morning that you are getting ready for your wedding.

I can understand why your mum has done this in terms of being helpful as thwy are traveling over from france but still.

I would not want unnessasery people around the morning of my wedding,

Honestly? I'd have had a fit if my mum had done that! My bridesmaids stayed the night before and hair and make up started at 7am on the day! I found it was busy enough without anyone else there. I guess you probably don't have much choice now, but you do need to designate an area for your MUA and somewhere to put your dress on so get that sorted now. I'm guessing these people will be leaving earlier in the morning as they'll have to beat you to the venue anyway, so that'll help.

Tbh I'm going to go the other way- it's your mum's house she can invite who she wants and I'm guessing they're elderly enough to not do very well by themselves in an area they aren't familiar with. If you want private time with your bridesmaids and to dictate who is around on the morning I'd book a hotel

Thanks for your replies!

I know it is my mums house and she can invite who she likes, I like these people and want to see them. I was worried about what they would do in the morning etc and if we would have enough space. It's helpful to know that some other people wouldn't be happy either. I'm not unhappy about it but would have preferred it to just be close family. I will just explain to my mum I want to be calm and not worried about my relatives and ask her to make sure they are ok! I think k am worrying too much about what they would do

A little bratty yes, it's their house so they can invite who they like, let me flip this, did you ask to have your friends over the night before your wedding? It is your day but it is their house and it's very accommodating of them to let your guests stay at their house instead of them having to stretch for flights and a hotel.

@christyx I didn't ask my mum if I could stay/invite friends as it was her idea for me to do both. She asked me to stay and suggest I ask people to visit the evening before. I wouldn't have just assumed I could invite people my parents wouldn't know as, like you said, it isn't my house! I wouldn't think her inviting relatives to stay was odd at all if she hadn't suggested/invited other people over for drinks etc.

Sorry, I'm on the app and can't seem to quote people's replies on here. Or if you can im just not very technologically advanced and can't work it out!