Am I being over sensitive to wedding shop owner?

No your bl**dy not!! How horrible!! 14 is NOT fat and this was exactly my fear so I sympathised but I am waaaaaay fatter than you at an 18! This women is an utter disgrace ... How on earth she stays in business I don't know. I'd complain in writing as this will likely colour your whole dress hopping experience.. I got a bit emosh reading your post as its such a horrid way to be treated ...

I went to a wedding fair today and didn't have the guts to try stuff on but they had big sizes in some stands and thy were lovely ... Utterly polite and honest ... I was asking about sizes in stock etc in the shop ... SHe looked at my boobs and said "you'll be trying on 22's cos of your boobs but don't worry etc" she didn't make me feel rubbish at all...

I am sooo cross on your behalf xxx Lots of hugs xx

What a ***. Your revenge is that she'll go out of business as who wants to buy from a bitter old mare like her!

I agree with KG - she's not going to be in business very long if she carries on like that! My jaw was dropping further and further as I read your post - that isn't just rude it's nasty. I'm a size 16 and have only met lovely people when trying on dresses - I hope that you've had good experiences in the shops that you've been too because then you'll know that the majority of them are lovely and not like that lady at all.

I thought I replied to you all but clearly the wine I've had to cheer myself up has made me rubbish at working the iPad properly!!

I was at the Bluewater fair today, which one did you go to?

i did have some lovely experiences today so it wasn't all bad, they were just the last stand I went to so she didn't ruin my whole day.

You're not being OTT at all, she sounds like a right nasty, cheeky cow and i'm surprised she still has a business with this attitude.
A size 14 is NOT fat at all so don't think that. I'm sure you'll have more positive experiences than with that bint!

I was at Bluewater too!! I'm wondering which stand? Bellaamore the lady was lovely ... I spent the most time in that one ... Was not keen on a couple of others ... One had ripped dresses ...

Oh the cheek of it!! What a horrible experience for you (and bless your OH for taking the brunt) I do the same thing.

Why can't these shops cater for "normal" sizes.

Is it UKs most common size is a 14? Isn't it?

The company I purchased my dress from is at blue water I hope it wasn't them.

Bell amore were amazing. I loved the ladies thre and that's where I felt great about myself in a dress. You should have tried some on, I hated getting my fat bum out in the weeny dressing room, but at that point I thought sod it....until meany woman later in the day!

If it's any consolation I was turned away from a Wedding Shop the other week, and I quote "We don't have anything for someone of your disposition" (she then looked me up and down., then pointed at my 'fat') "someone who carries extra weight"

I'm a size 22, I'm (sadly) a big girl who constantly has issues of fluctuating weight. The biggest thing I dreaded was dress shopping. My best friend dragged me out shopping (prior to this encounter), to which I ended up hyperventilating in the dressing room out of fear. The shops that day were mainly amazing and put me at so much ease (mainly 'I Do' in Gateshead, which was featured on Don't Tell The Bride this week). And although there were many dresses I couldn't try on (mainly tea length, which is what I wanted) I still managed to have a good experience.

The "disposition" experience was appalling, and floored me. I kept my composure until I left, then broke down. The sad thing is I wasn't surprised, it's everything I expected (and dreaded) going into buying dresses. Having it happen just validated my fears, and magnified my esteem issues. What makes it worse was I wasn't even wanting to buy a dress there, nor look. I'd went in as I'd seen their range of accessories at a Fair and thought I'd go buy some. Never again.

That's just awful, who do some of these shop owners think they are, it's making me so mad. Why are all the blooming models at the shows size 8 too? It's not realistic at all. Grrrrr. Did you find a dress yet?

Yeah, I don't understand their lack of diversity at Wedding Shows.....

yeah ive bought my dress last week. It's one I came across on my first day shopping. I was unsure of it as I couldn't try it on. I do really like it, tho it's a complete gamble wether it's right or not (we'll see in Jan). I do worry tho that I've convinced myself to buy it due to that horrible experience.-not wanting to prolong the dress issue. Despite the good experiences, it's just put a huge black cloud over the (joy) that should come with buying a beautiful, extravagent dress.

What an absolut b****. I'm sorry you had such a horrible experience.

If you are in the bluewater area and can get to eltham I can highly recommend the bridal chest. They are absolutely lovely and will make you feel so special. Don't let one horrible woman riun this experience for you!

GRRR this makes me mad! Who the hell do these people think they are?!

Try to forget about it, there are many bitter heartless bints about and you've been unfortunate in crossing paths with one. You must be gorgeous inside and out because some loves you enough to choose to marry you. Perhaps no one loves her? but that's her problem! Go out and find yourself a beautiful dress and forget about it.

(forgive me its Saturday night so I've been drinking)

Sash your post made me laugh

Most bridal shops are lovely but there are a few b****s out there. I only came across one, it was more her patronising condescending manner more than a personal slight at me but I did actually email a complaint to the shop.

14 is by no means an outside the norm size. I think the average sample size based on what I tried on appears to be a 12. Shouldn't be a problem! If she's ordering in 8s and 10s given that wedding dresses are on the small side for sizing then good luck to her selling many! I also think, incidentally, that her knowledge of what is slimming is a pile of cr**!

You're not being sensitive at all... A size 14 is hardly big is it?! I actually cannot believe her attitude.

Even if you were a larger sized lady there are ways to go about and say things.

I thought a lot of samples came in size 14 as it's a very common size so you can get the drift of how it'd look if you're a bit bigger or peg it if you're smaller.

I hope your friend didn't get her dress there!!

I went wedding dress shopping when I was a size 16 in a shop that was closing down. I walked out with a size 12 zip up dress. What I didn't know and they didn't tell me was that wedding dresses are generally 1 to 2 sizes smaller than the high street. Mine was a small size 10. I had no idea. The woman in the shop gave me the number of the woman who had done their alterations so she could let it out if necessary and told me not to lose it. "But I'm going to diet into it," I said. "But take it just in case," she said. "But I WILL diet into it," I said. "But take it anyway" and so on, and so on.

Proving her wrong was probably the extra added incentive I needed to get from 12 to 10.

You are definitely not being over-sensitive! Her job is to listen to what you want and help you find the dress of your dreams, and not to try and act like your personal Gok Wan!

I would have felt the same way you did. It is not on to keep going on about *problem areas* when you did not ask for fashion advice! And what if these areas are not any sort of problem for you?

She is entitled to an opinion and may genuinely feel she was being helpful, but she should have known better as a supplier that these sort of personal comments are neither acceptable or professional.

Andrea de Gabriel

Thank you all so much. I feel so much better now. Xxx

Glad your feeling better hon xx horrified at the other posters bad experience too (sorry I can't look back for posters name as on my phone! ) its so upsetting and exactly my fear. Glad u too had a good experience at Bellamore ...I do think honesty is important but there is such a thing as tact!!

Are you going to complain? X

Quite simply ... What a f@&;&g b£@&h !

Ignore her x

I went to the same fair earlier this year - while some of the dress stand were very lovely, some of them there were, in my opinion, a bit snobbish - and when I told them my top top budget was £1000 practically laughed in my face and looked like they didn't want me to touch any of their precious dresses. I came away feeling disheartened as I felt this was an extremely healthy budget for a dress for one day but as my first dress shopping experience I didn't know any different. Shopping in other places put me at ease and made me realise they were talking rubbish Though I would say for me some the best shop assistants were quite honest with me - told me dresses that didn't suit me and my shape and those that did and I was quite grateful for this as I would want someone to be straight with me but there's a difference between honesty and rudeness and it does sounds like she was being rude for the sake of it.- ignore it and go find the dress that makes you feel great else where.

I think size 16 is the UK's average size so don't feel bad - you have nothing to be upset about. You deserve to be treated with respect and dignity, no matter if you're a 14 or 24. As previous people have said, if she treats all her customers like that I'm sure she won't be in business long.

These shops have a duty to make you feel like a princess not to put you down so when you find your perfect dress, it will be from somewhere who'll treat you as such! ❤️

How appalling that this stupid cow treated you like that! Made me so mad!

Size 14 is certainly not fat and it's ridiculous that she made you feel that way. She's clearly a cold hearted b**ch who has never been loved by anybody!

Name and shame!!

Sometime writing a scathing review can make you feel so much better! If I were you I'd write a complaint to the store but wold also find a website or two that has reviews for her store, or facebook page and speak my mind there too!!

I think as ultimate revenge for this rudeness, if you can remember the name of the company, write them a review on every site you can find. Warn other brides about your experience. Name and shame the company. It's the only way they will learn.

Plus you don't want anyone else to go through that experience, and they rally don't deserve the money they make on the dresses

I don't know the name of the shop, it was just one of the many dress stands at the fair. I'm sure she'll put herself out of business before long.

i really don't mind being advised, when one of the ladies from a different shop told me to hold 'Thelma & Louise' up higher (she was referring to my boobs) for a better fit, it made me giggle. I guess it's the way people say things.

But blimey some of these wedding shops think they are too good for the average woman, it's quite mad!

Wow... im scared about trying on dresses because the ladies often help you get dressed (lacing you in etc.) and im unselfconscious about them seeing my scars etc.

im lucky to only be an 8 on top and 12 on bottom (so about a 10 in dresses) but can wear anything backless or shoulder-less (which is way more styles than you would think) because of my issues and to have someone pick on that when your already in a vulnerable position is disgusting, you should write a very angry letter (especially if she is not the owner of the shop)

good luck finding you perfect dress

She doesn't deserve your custom!!

She is the one missing out on business here, not you. At least you saw through her before she got your money

Size 14 is in no way fat, and even if you were a bigger lady who gives ANYONE the right to judge based on size? Every bride is entitled to feeling beautiful on her big day, regardless of being a size 6 or a size 22. Absolutely ridiculous.