Am I the only person who doesn't want an 'elegant' wedding? Can you help?

Well all decisions should be made jointly, but I'd have a look at the styles on somewhre like vistaprint or inspiredbride - many people have relaxed, fun weddings these days - it's your day as a couple, you should make it how you want!

I'd have a look at some ideas and things to help your worries. My OH had an idea in his head of what he wants, and now after I've done some stationery designs he's seen them and has changed his mind!

Let us know how you get on xxx

Umm, a couple of invites we have received recently have a nice picture of the couple on the front...could be an idea?

I think you are right though; your wedding should reflect your personality, i like the big wedding with the sit down meal & matching stationary but alot of ppl are going for a more relaxed atmosphere..BBQ's, no speeches, i think they are all lovely as they suit the couple!

At the end of the day, its your wedding, you should have what you want (obviously meaning you & OH) perhaps you can compromise?!

Yes this is exactly my problem with the changing of mind! He agrees to something and then decides 'no' afterwards!! I don't want anything floral, I don't want anything 'neat', my list is endless of what I do not want.

I completely understand why other people make these choices and have been sent some gorgeous invites from other people, but we aren't an 'elegant' couple, I shouldn't imagine I'll be elegant on the day and I really don't want to be!

It's frustrating because the 2 ideas we have come up with so far would be perfect but apparently it's a no!

I've told him he needs to find something he likes and present me with the idea. Time is ticking though so he'd better get cracking!!!!!

He mentioned about us having a photo on the front but I don't want that either really as we did that for our save the date. Sometimes I really wish he wasn't interested and just let me get on with things because he makes it all so much more stressful. grrrrrr.

My OH and I are a very soppy couple according to our friends. We were originally going to have a picture of our venue on the front of our invites, but then i drew a little sketch that i thought depicted us as a couple and my OH loved it. So instead of having an 'elegant' invite, our's are going to be really quite soppy which will make a lot of our friends smile and roll their eyes at the invite.

Why don't you both design one together? you can take your ideas to some of the HIB who should be able to help!

Hi If you'd like some help with your invitations then please do get in touch. Maybe you could get the best of both worlds and incorporate elements of what you both want. I'm sure we can come up with something you both will like. Nat

This is what we have gone for! Everything about our wedding is "us". If we have a fancy, posh wedding, that wouldn't be us. What is us, is hearty food, free booze and a great band!

Our invites we designed ourself- a photo my h2b took (not of us, of some mugs we had, one with a "d" and the other with "v"- our initials)... if you're interested I can flash! Otherwise, yes, you can have a personal wedding without it being "childish"!

WSS

Our wedding is totally us, , it's going to be a great big mish mash of everything we love.

We have designed and made our own invites. We have made them out of CD's which are black and made to look like old vinyl records, , ,

x

Whatever you end up deciding on, it should be "your" wedding, that the two of you both want. If you both want different things, then that's obviously an issue you need to talk over and compromise on where necessary.

I suppose the real issue here is how you define "elegant" - ours will be meticulously planned (even if it all goes belly up in the first 5 minutes) but we won't be having the meringue dress, big church, castle reception, 20 bridesmaids, flowers everywhere, string quintet playing all day, fancy meal and all the trimmings but the day that we want to have. It's in a hotel (nice but nothing extravagant) so guests don't have to travel, we're having a barbecue instead of a formal meal, and a barn dance instead of a disco.

Basically, if you're having a bridal dress, bridesmaids in dresses, the men in suits and some flowers, then it's "elegant" rather than, say, jeans and t-shirts. But it's what level of 'elegant' you are looking for, and assuming that it's not at the expense of the things you want that makes the difference.

I found a neat trick to help others understand our wedding was telling them that the wedding theme was 'nothing matches'. It seemed to placate those who insisted there should be a theme of some description.

To be honest though my OH have just booked/bought things that we liked regardless of what people might think. I do have a slight fear that people will not like it but 'who cares' those that know us best already know the types of people we are.

Good luck with your OH. Maybe try showing him some cool alternative wedding blogs, just to see if there is anything he likes.

hahahahaha, no chance!! MrMini just goes along with what I say!

Why dont yous go have a fun photoshot get pictures of use lafing and carrying on and have a few on they picz on the front of the invite but you could have it in black and white? it would be elegant and fun?

thanks 4 all the help. we talked it through+ came2 a compromise,i just need 2make them now !