American forums

This forum has had its moments

Oh yes, we're not angels! ?

But someone saying 'I want to have a party after coming back from our elopement, should it be on X day or Y day' doesn't really warrant 20 people saying 'Sorry, but you've had your day'

Oooh just had a look, can't believe this response when someone asked if they should still expect their friends to throw them a bachelorette when they are eloping -

''Given that, if you elope, you do not have any guests, so you must decline any pre-wedding parties. You can, however, just have a NWR girls night out before or after you leave. No tiaras, no boas, no theme, but just a normal night out on the town with those you want to spend time with''

She's not allowed a feather boa on her hen do because she's eloping? ?

1. Is it rude to have a cash bar? Yes.
   
   
2. Why? Because your wedding reception is a thank you gift to your guests for attending your wedding, and no one should be expected to pay for any part of their own thank you gift.
   
   
3. But, I can't afford to pay for all of my guests to drink! There is no rule that says you have to provide alcohol at your wedding reception. Yes, many people like to drink, but you are planning this thank you gift for your guests and you should plan what you can afford and host it graciously. If that means you serve a simple dinner and non-alcoholic beverages, that's okay. Just make sure that whatever you do serve is not paid for by your guests.
   

God forbid offering a choice...

Well, you gotta remember that American customs and etiquette are very different to here. It's not necessarily rude so much as just adhering to a different set of rules than ours.

They're very strick on their rules though!

Just read a thread about receiving lines... wow American wedding plan is scary! I'm glad I have this place!

Um, wow. Move with the times america! Its your wedding, do whatever the hell you want!

Lol... Americans are a little weird (beautiful country though)

ever watched the American show 'bridezillas' it says everything you need to know, makes dont tell the bride look like childs play lol

LOL, don't believe all the things you read. I live in Mexico and have lots of American friends here whose sons and daughters got married here. The things may apply for weddings in the US if you do it 'traditionally' but all the weddings I have been invited to here are nothing like that at all! All of the weddings were totally easy going and great fun, nothing of what it says on the American forums. The Americans all seem to have a rehearsal dinner where everybody gets to know each other before the wedding and to discuss who will be doing what during the wedding. They have a hen and stag night (called bachelor or bachelorette night) and its pretty much the same as the UK weddings. As to alcohol at the wedding, it probably is more expensive than the dinner so many couples buy 3 or 4 hours open bar for their guests but those who are on a tight budget do the champagne toast and then people buy their own drinks. The weddings I have been to were all held in private locations as most of the hotel weddings are pretty much the same and they all have quite a few restrictions so the couples hired a caterer and bought the alcohol at a wholesale place or at an off license. Much cheaper and a lot allow the unused bottles to be returned.

Oh my goodness! Have just read a few of the cash bar threads! I can't believe dry weddings are a thing and offering such a limited choice with no option to buy is considered rude! We are having some bubbly for after the ceremony and for the speeches and wine with the meal and are hoping we'll also be able to buy everyone (including evening guests) one drink but that's it, an open bar was never even considered!

I just read the one about used napkins - words fail me!!

I read that one too bekkijane - some people can just be downright rude in their responses!!

Used napkins? Couldn't find that one.

I find it very odd that it is considered more acceptable to have a completely dry wedding than to have a cash bar. Don't think that would ever happen in this country!

It's the obsession with giant diamond rings and planned proposals that does my head in. Plus although they don't go for cash bars, they DO expect all their bridesmaids and groomsmen to pay for their own outfits.

Pahahaha! Just been on to have a nose, think I'm going to lose chunks of my life to this! So much fun

Oh i read the napkin one too - it's the one called "let us have your leftovers" lol I have had to stay off it as when i went on it yesterday i very quickly lost an hour and hadn't scratched the surface lol

Wow I thought can't be that bad had a little look and just wow! My favourite bad advice is 'What you can't do is have the wedding you want at the expense of your guests.'

This because the bride wanted a pot luck wedding, they were so mean about it! Feel really sorry for the bride

I can't believe the money side of things. As has been mentioned before, it's ok to have a dry wedding rather than guests buying their own drinks?! But bridesmaids are expected to buy their own dresses, are you joking?! The price difference between paying for all the booze vs buying a couple of dresses is insane. If I had an open bar at my wedding I would be so far in debt I don't think I'd ever pay it back, a lot of my guests can drink a couple of bottles of wine on their own!

I cant find it

What, the forum in general?

yeah typed it in but cant see it x

Are we allowed to link to it here?

Im not sure, was going to be cheeky and ask for a link but didnt know if we could x

Http://wedding.theknot.com/wedding-message-boards.aspx

I don't think I can be seen as promoting a competitor - it would be of no use to anyone planning a wedding in the UK or based in the UK...

Thanks for that will have a nose xx