And the venue hunt begins.....

Don't give up hope, you will find one that feels right! I definitely don't think you are asking too much.

i initially discounted my dream venue after looking on their website - luckily decided to have a look anyway and couldn't stop crying all the way around, I knew it was perfect straight away.

I am also really picky, I said no to one venue just because there was a portrait I didn't like in the bar area!!

Good luck with the next 9!

I think as long as you have realistic expectation within your budget you definitely just know when you find the one.

We always knew the venue we wanted so didn't view any others, but you never know your dream venue might be one of the ones left to view.
Just keep an open mind and don't lose hope, as Funky says too keep a realistic budget in mind and sure you'll find a great venue

I'm going through the same thing hun, and no you're not expecting too much or being too picky! I'm looking for venues both on the cheap AND expensive end and STILL haven't found the WOW factor! I'm hoping not to have to 'settle', so I don't think you should either x

We looked at up to 20 venues plus (these were ones we actually viewed in real life, and I knocked hundreds off list by looking online)

I got very despondent as they didn't feel right or problems with each other them, such as not enough capacity in venue room, no civil ceremony licence, bad location, horrible carpets, venue shutting at 11..... until we found the one we loved and felt right for both of us. Along the way were ones I liked but my H didn't, and vice versa.

We kept looking until we found the one we loved. Still compromised though - wasn't keen on the ceremony room as dark wood but compromised as was only in there for about half hour.

Have you got more to view?

Ok, I found my dream venue. I was in love. I wanted it so much. But they wanted £9k venue hire alone on a saturday. i was heartbroken. how in the hell could we justify £9k for the use of two rooms?????

mr winter shut me down. so i began looking again. i liked another one a lot. a lot, a lot, but my cousin had married there so it wouldn't be a new venue to my family and i hated the room the used for the disco. they were within budget but i needed to look at other options. so i found another (our first night hotel now incidentally!) and it was nice.....but it wasn't it. it was also £3k more than venue 2 (cousin venue).

so i was now 3 fave's in with no decision. we went to see a local purpose built wedding venue. it was LOVELY but £4k venue hire and very, VERY modern- still wasn't it. mr winter liked it more than me but in the week we viewed it, 8 people posted wedding photo's from this venue and each was a samey as the last. we decided if we were paying that much for a building, we wanted it to scream us and this didn't.

we had two left on the list. easthampstead park and loseley park. neither set me on fire looking online but both were suitable and within budget.

i poured over the websites for weeks but eventually we decided to view loseley because we both really wanted a barn.

i bawled like a baby the whole way around. it was PERFECT. it had EVERYTHING we wanted. EVERYTHING. it was a million times better than it looked online and we paid the venue hire in cash there and then!

i've been back 5 time since for wedding fairs and meetings and each time i've cried. we had a meeting there two weeks ago and as we were leaving wild deer ran across our path. we had another meeting last week and the whole time we were there i was breathless and my face ached from smiling.

i hope the same happens for you. i honestly thought after we lost venue 1 that whatever i ended up with would never be as good but genuinely, even writing this i cannot stop beaming! and this coming from a hard-hearted, slipknot listening, total ***.

i feel sure your dream venue is out there and when you see it i really hope you get the feeling.

anything we can do to help? xxx

We looked for months and were becoming more and more despondent. I think we viewed about 15 but like someone else said looked at hundreds online.

In the end we came to a standstill and couldn't see a way forward. We decided we'd have to compromise on something and for us that was the distance as it wasn't as close to our home as we would have liked but when we got there we both just loved it. I suppose the point I'm trying to make is that the perfet place for you will exist but you may have to make sacrifices and nothing about it can be 100% perfect but it cn be very close.

I echo cliarehj here,

I actually found my dream venue, the ashes, but it was completely out of our budget! i wanted a barn but after searching i figured it was a stretch too far since they were popular thus expensive. I then went on the attack from a different angle and looked at modern hotels. quite the switch but i found 2 that offered a good deal of what i wanted for my budget, each had a little compromise to be made. The one i chose looks .... dull from the outside, like every other hotel or modern building but the decor is a twist of modern and vintage so we bagged it.

I think it best to have a main list of needs, a list of wants that you cut compromise on and approach each venue with an open mind.

Perfect venues do exist! We were on the look out for such a venue some time back for our wedding. It was disappointing initially as nothing fell in place together. But we finally found Le Jardin, the wedding banquet hall in Toronto which swept us off our feet. They provided the best of services which were tailor made according to our requirements. Keep searching and you will find the right place for you!

We just went with the one that ticked most of the boxes and was in budget, it's not my dream venue but it's nice and we get a lot for our money. I looked at hundreds on line and there was a problem with each of them, this was the first one I saw that had everything we needed so we booked it and didn't bother looked at other venues that I knew wouldn't really be suitable. I figured that there's more to a wedding than just the venue, what you do with the place can make a big difference.

I thought I had found the dream venue a few years ago after going to a friend of my OH's wedding - however since then two of my close friends have got married there and another not-so-close friend has too. It kind of put a downer on it for me, so on the hunt again.

Thanks for all the replies, I'm glad it's not just me who has this ideal thought for a venue.

We have had a quote back for the place we liked and it is just within budget but again we'd have to factor in additional costs for hotels, guest transport and actually getting married so it might just break the bank for us.

I think my main problem is I like the look of old buildings on the outside but I want a contemporary look inside and most venues just don't have that!

We now have 11 more to see (added two extra to the list yesterday!) so we will go to see all of them and I guess if none pops out as "the one", we'll go back to "the sort-of one".

I guess I just feel like this day will only happen once and I don't want to just "make-do". I feel bad thinking that way (and rather ungrateful actually).

I understand exactly what you mean.....my problem is I went to one venue early on that was so beautiful and so perfect for what I had in mind that nothing else comes close and when we have added everything up we can afford it if we have it Mon-Thurs and OH doesn't want a mid-week wedding as he thinks its too much to ask people to take time off work. (Is anyone else going for a mid-week wedding and how did the guests react?) Another venue was a 'it'll do' but it was too far away and we think its too far for guests to travel to. I knew what I was looking for but like you the more venues we see the more fed up I get. The ones that look beautiful on the websites seem stuffy and formal in real life. Have you tried describing what you are looking for on here as someone may have a recommendation?

PS if anyone knows of any venue recommendations in Yorkshire....I'm looking for somewhere with accommodation and a marquee for the wedding breakfast for around 50-60 people - don't like the stately homes as they look too stuffy. My theme is going to be romantic - candlelight, ivory and lace etc.

I don't know what to say @cinnamon009 other than I'm so sorry you can't get the venue you want - can you not barter them down to an acceptable weekend rate? Or maybe you could arrange it for a bank holiday Monday or something?

I know what you mean about the beautiful venues online looking stuffy in real life. Our problem isn't a lack of venues to visit, but time to visit them. My OH is really busy at the moment and I can't really see them without him. We have so many wonderful venues to see, but no time to see them. It's very frustrating right now, especially as I know time is ticking and they're probably getting booked up fast.

Luckily we're flexible with dates so it's not too much of a crisis if we have to wait 3-6 months to get the venue we want but I really don't want a summer wedding, so if we can't have Jan-Apr next year it'll have to wait til October/November.... ☹️

Miss Winter your experience sounds amazing at finding your venue!!!

Mustard Mitt - We were quite lucky in that a lady I work with had been to the venue we picked, for a wedding of a friend of her son's.

We went to the venue and it was first on our list of four after looking on the website and already falling a little in love! When we went to see it, I got 'the feeling' and was very excited. We thought the basic drafted costing would be extortionate but we're ecstatic when it came in around the mark of our budget. We decided to check out the other venues ( I have this thing where I need to double check we've made the right decision so I'll check out the competition and compare it with the one we've chosen just to make sure!) and we knew it was the right one!

We're going for Rushpool Hall in Cleveland. It looks a little Disney princess, and found out it’s haunted by two ghosts too!! Exciting!!!

Hi,

Don`t know where you live but we would recommend both venues that my daughters used;

South Farm, Royston, Cambs and

Draytoin Old Lodge, Norwich, Norfolk

Hope that helps

Lynne

There's nothing wrong with being picky! You're only going to do this once, so you should be sure the venue is where you want to get married. I'm sure you will find something so, keep trying and enjoy being treated like a princess whenever you go and visit somewhere new. Xx