Another RSVP problem - experienced letter writters in here!

I would leave out the 'if you are attending' bit. they've had more than enough chances. But then I am a a***/bridezilla/stuck-up cow ?

WSS

I would just write and say "we have tried a couple of times to contact you and as we havnt heard anything we assume you cant attend, which is a shame. Hope you are both well.

WEES - I'll be doing the same - going to knock up some postcards saying

"Sorry you can't be with us, pleae raise a glas to us!"

I'd go with what Vikster says.

I wrote with a near identical problem a few days ago, Im just going to write and say. As we have not recieved your RSVP, we are assuming that you are all unable to attend. Im not putting the bit asking if im assuming wrong, mainly because I'm faffing annoyed that they couldn't be bothered to phone or fill out a RSVP slip. I'm past caring if they think im Bridezilla/*****

I would put something like "we're sorry you won't be able to attend our wedding but we hope to see you in the future" or something similar

I agree with others, except, I know this sounds rude to them but, if you have tried by email/phone....is there a real obligation to write as well? I dunno....I suppose you should, but I'd be really tempted not to bother!! lol

Only problem with this is that they may be those (RUDE!!!!) people who feel it is acceptable not to RSVP and just turn up on the day. I think a letter is a good idea as it lets them know in no uncertain terms that they are NOT COMING.

Thanks everyone. On reflection I agree with you all, I'm going to leave out the option for them to change their mind! Only reason we're doing it is to make sure they are aware that they can't just turn up on the day. And little madam I like your postcard idea - seems nice and informal and less threatening! x

WEES. I would definitely leave out the option for them to attend now! Cheeky feckers!

I have invited some relatives that I'm pretty sure won't come, so if they don't reply I'm going to send them a note:

We haven't heard back from you regarding our wedding, so we've assumed you aren't coming. We're sorry you won't be there, but we'd appreciate if you would raise a glass of something to us on the (date) and think of us!

I've given them everey opportunity - included a RSVP card and addressed envelope with the invite, given them email address, phone numbers, and got a wedding website where they can RSVP on line - no excuse really!

I'm not really too close to the point where I'm even sending out invites (they haven't even been designed yet!!) but after seeing so many posts about the problem with tardy RSVPers I'm sorely tempted to put something on the invite, never mind waste my time chasing after the fact!!

How would this go down

RSVP - please respond by DATE to let us know if you can/cannot attend. If we haven't heard from you by DATE we will assume you're not coming and will make sure your dinner gets cancelled (or re-directed to the Bridal Suite)

?