anyone else been insulted by a dress fitter?

That's atrocious!!! Now I am a bigger girl - size 20 and with a 40F bust and I would never put up with something like that - how very rude!!! As far as I'm concerned, you are a perfectly normal size - and probably have the sort of figure I'd kill for so don't let stupid people like that make you think any the less of yourself. the minute someone starts to insult you like that, walk away!!

I have to say, the majority of bridal shops are not like that, not because I've only had good experiences (I only went to one shop and they were lovely!) but because that's human nature and shops who behave like that wont' have a business for long xxx

Don't let them put you off - be confident in your size and your beauty and go back to the first shop and on to others if you want to and enjoy the experience ?

Hi i can see that your from the Redditch area, have you tried Georgina Scott Bridal Pedmore/Lye.I had mine fron there in 2012 the staff were very helpfull & made me feel vey special.They have all sizes including 14-16 upwards & if you like a dress & haven't got a sample size they will order it in.x

Hi,

Sorry to hear about your bad experience, this happened to me too ☹️

This was like the fourth shop I had been in all the others were lovely. I am a size 12 and this shop had a dress that I had seen before and I loved but it was a size 8. The woman said to me the reason they only had it in a smaller size was because someone of my size shouldnt be wearing a style like that, she actually patted my hips and said there is nothing we can do about this, I was so upset I actually cried when I got home. Its supposed to be a really happy exciting time and I think its awful that someone can make you feel like that!!!!!

I am the same I know im not a skinny girl and I wouldnt want to be I do have a big bum but I love my hourglass shape. Luckily I have got my dress now and I LOVE it, cant wait to wear it!! ?

I havent tried that shop but think I will.

The ladies were just so rude. I also asked if they could incorporate some colour into the dress as I always wanted red on it. I even took my wedding shoes with me which are red. They said that red would look silly on a white dress and I shouldnt have one like that. I said I liked mermaid style dresses also and they said that it wouldnt suit me cos of my 'fuller figure'.

Well im sorry lady, but my fella loves me with a bit of meat on my bones and im not changing for some snotty dress lady.

Thanks you for making me feel better ladies. I kniw not all dress shops are like this as I had a great experience with the first shop. It just left me feeling very self concious on the day. I dont think they will be staying in business very long if thats how they treat brides who would be potential customers. They have lost my business through their mouths and would have no problem naming and shaming round redditch x

12/14 is not big, definitely do not buy from the second shop, terrible, sorry you had such an experience!

My God they sound like horrible, horrible people! They are just wrong so you try and forget the whole experience.

I think red shoes and bit of red on the dress will look AMAZING!

You poor thing, what a horrible way to treat someone! It shouldn’t matter what size someone is (and you are on the slim side in my opinion anyway) no one should behave that way.

I had an experience in what shop I went to that upset me, although it was much more subtle that yours. I had been to a few shops and tried on a range of dresses and narrowed down the style I wanted – something a bit fitted basically (mermaid rather than fishtail). I had no problem fitting into samples in the other shops; a few dresses were a bit tight, but I could get them all on and they were generally 12s and 14s.

I found a shop that sold their own designs and would do a more bespoke dress if you wanted. I was really excited, as their designs looked amazing, plus they weren’t too pricey. The woman was lovely when I rang up for an appointment and asked what dress size I was; I answered truthfully that I wore a 10-12.

I went with my mum and when we got there, the owner sat us down and explained her philosophy and why she’d opened the shop (it had only been open a year or so at that point). Basically she’d gone wedding dress shopping with a very tall friend who had found the whole experience really hard as none of the samples fit her and few designers seemed able to adjust their dresses to fit her.

She then showed us the dresses and I chose a few gorgeous ones to try on. The first one barely went on and looked awful, which was okay because, you know, that happens. The second I couldn’t even get on and after that the owner measured me and basically told me I wouldn’t fit into any of the samples I wanted to try on (all fitted dresses) and brought in a full-skirted one instead. By that point I was feeling pretty upset but I let her put it on me.

It was a lovely dress but not at all what I wanted and the owner and her mother flitted around me saying things like ‘You feel better in that one don’t you?’ implying that a woman of my apparently enormous size should be wearing something to hide my curves. I was nearly in tears but they kept going, adding a veil and more fabric – why I didn’t just leave I don’t know, I suppose I felt too embarrassed.

They weren’t trying to be cruel but why open a wedding boutique following a friend’s difficulties finding a dress to fit and then make all your samples too small for anyone over a size 8 to fit into?!

Bearing in mind the owner designed all the dresses herself, and had them made (timescale about 8-12 weeks) not once did she suggest we could choose one of the dresses and have it in a bigger size, or even design one between us.

I eventually found a beautiful mermaid style dress and felt gorgeous in it, so don’t let anyway put you off.

Sorry to hear you've had such a bad experience. My daughter who's a beautiful size 6 or 8 and very petite, around 4'8 experienced something similar in the first shop she went to. Being rather petite she's always lacking self confident. When she went into the shop (feeling nervous but excited, obviously) the lady looked her up and down and actually said I don't think we stock anything suitable for you, you'll need midget sizes. My daughter never told me this at the time and I only found out because she's been dress shopping with me. Apparently she called into the shop with her friend one day, as not to make a fuss. We did eventually go shopping together and we bought a gorgeous gown which she had altered to fit. On the plus side though we recently found the shop has gone bust, and judging by the bad reviews I'm not surprised. What goes around comes around!

I've actually seen dresses which incooperate red in it and i think it actually looks really good, don't listen to those stupid women they don't know what they are talking about.

I've not actually been dress shopping yet but I made an appointment at a boutique, then the next day the lady emailed me to ask when my wedding was. When she found out it is still over 2 years from now she said I was too early to start looking and suggested I contact her again when I am looking 'seriously.' I thought that was rude but your experience is just disgusting behaviour, no wonder you're upset. Cross them off the list!

I would have basically just walked out at the first remark.

That's ridiculous, and I'm MUCH bigger than you. I was careful to choose where I went.

Wow I'm amazed that these women are saying that when a size 12 isn't even considered a huge size! I have no idea how they stay in business when the average size is around is a 16. If I had an experience like that I would name and shame.

Its weird they say you are large because I'm a size 12 (and considered to have large chest for my size) and with every shop I've been to, the wedding dress samples are huge on me, and even in the chest area.

I'm going dress shopping in a couple of weeks for the first time and I'm terrified of this happening. I was ill and put some weight on in the last couple of months which I am struggling to shift so I'm a dress size up at a size 14. I kept putting off going to look at dresses in case this happens until I had lost the weight again but made an appointment when my friend is down visiting for us to go together. Now I'm wondering if I will be left red faced in front of my friend.

Does anyone have recommendations from the Hertfordshire area where this won't happen?

Oh no that's horrible, I'm sorry that happened to you Agree with everyone else though, size 12 is NOT big in any way, and also agree that red would look lovely! Besides, I think mermaid dresses look much better on someone with a curvy figure (again, not that a size 12 is really *very* curvy).

I haven't actually been dress shopping yet but am now slightly dreading it with all these reports of snooty dress shop ladies!

YES.

Full disclosure: I am really lucky on 2 counts, I found my dress on first shopping excursion at my second appointment of 3, and before I went to the offending boutique.

One shop I went into in Swansea had only ludicrously small sizes and instead of saying "oh I don't know why they make the samples so small" or similar, the woman (I refuse to refer to her as a lady) said that they were skinny and I wouldn't get in them... She was rude throughout, and didn't seem to be making much of an effort.

She then refused to let me try on a dress I liked (which had some red on it, funnily enough) because "it's not your shape", despite the fact I'd said to her from the beginning that I wanted to try on a range of different shapes and styles - even having seen a lovely dress, which we didn't tell her about or give any sign of, we might have found something stupendous/ completely different, since it WAS our first day .. which we HAD told her.

Honestly, had I not already fitted into, and loved, another dress, I really would have left in tears. And/or my little sister/ chief bridesmaid would have swung for the rude assistant. I'm also a 12.

Aww this is horrible, how dare they treat you like this! I suggest you do a review on trip advisor or some other rating website so warn others and maybe they might learn their lesson!

Oh wow that is awful! What a horrible cow. I am a size 12/14, went to 3 shops and all I experienced was lovely ladies that made me feel amazing. I know that doesnt take away what happened to you but I cant believe many shops have nasty cows in them. And btw my dress is a mermaid and I think it looks fabulous. Xx

Im a size 16 and have my dress appointments booked for four weeks and am absolutely dreading it.If some ladies were struggling to try dresses on and are smaller than me.. I hope I find some dresses to try on :-( x

What rude people and I don't get the remark about Florida at all - you're a standard size so why on earth it would have to be made specially god only knows! You must have hit very unlucky with that shop, I'm a 16 and went to lots of shops, all of which I'm glad to say were lovely. I didn't fit into all of the dress of course but the majority were happy to squeeze me into anything that I could get past my hips!

I am forever in two minds about this subject. Of course, nobody should be made to feel like crap and I'm not excusing any shop assistant/owner who does so. However, I also think that honesty is the best policy when it comes to wedding dress shopping. It is likely to be the most important (and probably the most expensive) dress you will ever buy. These women have (hopefully) got a decent eye for what works on different figure types and I'd rather be told point blank that a dress shape isn't working for me (and will NEVER work for me) than have a fawning lady just trying to sell me anything.

I think patting the bottom and suggesting that you've got too much muffin going on is dreadful. But I'm not so sure that saying that a mermaid shape doesn't tend to suit a fuller figure is particularly bad. It's honest, and it's true, and not all of us can rely on complete honesty from our shopping buddies.

Different dress shops, especially the more boutique ones, will also favour particular styles (depending on the owner's taste/price point). In the lines I was looking at, I didn't see a single sample over a size 10 and I can only assume that's because that the owners thought that the type of shape I was looking at (long, bias, slinky) wouldn't look at its best on a bigger girl (I was probably pushing it with a bigger-than-size-10 bottom). In the same shops, I saw bigger sizes in different styles, so it wasn't a point blank refusal to stock bigger sizes (although I'm sure some owners pitch themselves to a particular body shape to create that "model/celeb/WAG" vibe....).

I feel that saying a style doesnt suit a fullerfigure is not true,its an opinion. I agree that there needs to be a balance between false flattery and nastiness though. Any decent shop should nicely point out if a dress doesn really work but never tell anyone they shouldnt consider a mermaid,column etc. I was gently steered away from certain dresses but I didnt feel offended in any way because of how it was done.

I didnt mean to put anyone off going dress shopping. I did have a wonderful experience at the first shop. They made me feel AMAZING. However, it was tarred by the experience of the second.

I would not have been offended if I had tried on a mermaid style and was told it didnt suit me. Thats why I take my mom. I trust her opinion and she is as hinest as anything. Likewise with my daughter. But I didnt even try one on and they said I shouldnt consider it.

This company was awarded a dragons den type deal and are getting free rent for a year if they make the business successful. I dont see this happening if they treat their customers this way.

I dont understand the florida reference either. They said thats where their dressmaker is who has to copy the dresses. Very strange.

They also didnt like it when I said I had been to a shop before them. When I told them which one, they dissed them so much saying they had lots of brides needing realterations from the first shop.

Do not agree with this at all. Slagging off fellow businesses. The first shop has been in business for over 25 years and has had the same seamstress all that time. They even told me to go shop around and they will be there if we need them.

Going shopping again this sat so hopefully will find a dress I like. Also to a wedding fair at avoncroft on sun.

Please dont be put off ladies x

Not me, but when I was getting BM dresses for my first wedding, we went to a place in Cannock. My BMs were a size 8, 12 and 14. The largest BM is almost 6ft tall and suffers from Crohns, which makes her weight fluctuate, so naturally she's a little sensitive about it. Most of the samples were size 8-12, so my two smallest BMs tried them on. However, one of the samples we really liked was too big for both of my other BMs, so the largest one tried it on. The zip was really stiff, so she was struggling with it in the dressing room. Meanwhile, the assistant was flitting about around the dressing room door wringing her hands nervously and muttering to herself. After a couple of minutes she shouted "Are you ok in there?". My BM replied that she was having a little trouble with the zip and the woman shrieked "Don't break it!!". My BM stepped out of the dressing room and the dress was actually a little big on her, but in spite of that the assistant was flapping around nagging her to take it off. Needless to say, she went straight back in the dressing room, got changed, and we walked straight out.

I can't believe some of these shops are still in business, what awful behaviour! I agree the shop assistants should be honest but to say that you shouldn't even try something on is ludicrous; most of the shops I went in encouraged me to try on a variety of styles until the final shop when I was so clear about what I wanted the lady was able to find the ones she had that matched what I wanted. Also; I'm a 12/14 and found the fishtail styles far more flattering than A-line and have seen ladies bigger than me wearing fishtail styles and looking stunning!

They don't deserve your business. The shop I went was lovely I too have crohns like another lady said that her bridesmaid had. They only stocked size 14 and 16 because this is the average size of the British woman. I'm an 8 but other days because of my belly I can be a 10. They were lovely I will have my last fitting 2 days before my wedding because I don't know what size I will be. Just goes to show some people will bend over backwards and other just don't deserve you time let alone you money.

you will find your perfect dress in your perfect shop don't let them put you off.

I had the same!! 1st shop I went were fab, down to earth, honest but lovely ladies. the 2nd was awful!!!! told us to pull some dresses for me to try and then dismissed most of them with almost a laugh before we went to the changing room. once in the changing room she poked and prodded me and also wouldn't let me try on another 2 of the dresses but was trying to hard well me one I had one that was awful! needless to say after the 2nd dress we left and I went back to the 1st shop and ordered my dress.

2months after I had been shopping the offending shop in question actually shut down!!! and no wonder!!!! I had only gone there as it was one of the biggest and well known in the area but I am almost thankful that they made me walk out or I could have ended up ordering from a shop and been let down! (the 1st shop is trying to help out brides that we're let down by the 2nd!!)

xx

The ladies in these shops sound awful, how they are still in business baffles me. What happened to us women being able to embrace our curves, I am a size 10 top and 12 bottom, I love my curvy butt lol. 12/14 is no way near big, I had a good shopping experience but I feel mad for you ladies who have been treated like this as its a special moment picking your wedding dress xx

I had a little trouble myself, but not with any shops I arranged appointments with. I am a size 20, so a lot larger than you, so I made sure when I arranged to go to the shop that they had something I could try on. The worst in those shops were sales assistants telling dresses looked nice when I felt very self conscious about how big they made my boobs look.

My problem came when I popped into a shop just for a browse, and was told there was nothing there that would fit me - despite the fact they had some size 18s in stock (with lace up backs), and I knew I had got into loosely done up size 14s and 16s. I wanted to cry when I left, I'm not sure how I stopped myself.

That's awful! It should be an amazing experience!

i went to a very 'posh' wedding dress shop, where I felt the owner was looking down her nose at me and my bridesmaids as soon as we walked in, anyway on trying one of the dresses on she had put the dress over my head and I made a comment that it didn't feel right. It turned out the under lay was all at the front instead of evenly around me, which made it extremely tight and difficult to get out of. She then started panicking and having a go at me because I was going to rip her dress.

Didn't matter how nice the dresses were, we got out of there quick after that!

Im sorryto hear of your bad experiences too ladies. Its quite astonishing how rude some people can be at a time that should be such a great chapter in a womans life.

I only intend to do this once so im gonna brush it under the carpet and move forward. They will not be having my custom. I have a busy weekend arranged of dress shopping and a wedding fayre so im gonna look forward to that.

Thank you all for making me feel better x

Astonished at some of the rudeness some of you ladies have experienced! I'm a size 12 too and large around the bust area - struggled to squeeze into some dresses I tried on and the lady in the shop very diplomatically said 'it's because your waist is so tiny compared to your chest'. It's really not, but I appreciated the soft-soap which is kind of what you'd expect I think.

I had a similar experience. I visited a few lovely dress shops, but I visited another I was looking at the dresses, and one of the ladies told me I couldn't try them on as they wouldn't fit and would have to have one made to me due to this.
I'm a size 12/14 probably was more a 14 at the time but I don't consider myself 'big' when I've tried dresses on in other shops?!?!