Anyone else think this is weird or am I being unreasonable?

Personally I don't see the issue with him having a copy of it if you like all the pics but I do understand if you were planning on giving him an album/images as a Christmas present. I think it's lovely he wants all the photos tbh. Sorry if that wasn't the answer you wanted but it's his house and pics of his son so I sort of think its natural for a dad to be extremely proud and that's probably why he wants all the images.

I agree with your hubby about the FB thing though. Sorry ?

I dont think its unreasonable at all!! After all, it was YOUR day, therefore the photos are personal to you and Mr Zippy.

I think every single photo is a step too far.

I can completely see why he would want photos of his sons wedding - but I'm thinking a few family shots, not all of them. Me and OH are sending our guests to the reception while we have some pics taken at the church as some of the ones me and OH are going to get done are quiet personal - he wants one of him swinging me round in his arms etc and since he is not a very soppy personal generally he wouldn't be comortable giving these out to people.

I also wouldnt be happy having pics of me and OH being all soppy, kissing etc in other peoples possesion - just me - i'm sure your reasons differ, but whatever they are, if your not happy with it, then don't give them.

IMO I think you should (if you havent already) give me a select few - perhaps some suggested by him / you are comfortable with but thats the limit.

Unless he paid of course, then I say he has a right to them all?

DOn't be sorry, I just wanted another view on it. I suppose I just don't see the point in him having a copy. Out of 265 photos there are probably only about 60 that would probably be relevent to their family. There are loads and loads of our friends that they don't even know. I know they are proud of their son, and there is also the small matter that he paid for our photographer, but that doesn't mean it should come with conditions! I think I'm most annoyed that they have spoilt all our Christmas plans by wanting this.

Just tell them

we have already organised an album for your christmas and photos for other relatives so wait until then and if theres other's you'd like then we'll burn them to a disc after xmas......

Hopefully the guilt of ruining their xmas surprise will make them back off a little.

I tried to burn my togs pics onto a disc and couldnt do it.....our disc wasnt big enough, tog must have some special means of doing it from their software... I wanted a back up copy for safe keeping...i'll have to make one over two discs....

A CD can store about 800mb of data, a DVD used as a data disc can store just over 4GB.

That may be the reason you couldn't get a copy if you were just trying to copy a DVD full onto a CD.

You can pick up 4gb flash drives for under a tenner in PC World so it might be worth investing in a couple of those too and putting them with other people for safe keeping?

My mum sort of kept on nagging us for pics and I was doing an album for them last Christmas (I had 7 months of nagging lol) so I picked the most appropriate pics for them which was mainly family ones and excluded the friends because like you say my parents didn't know all our friends.

Teehee's idea is fab whereas I just acted like an arrogant cow face of a daughter and tried to wing it until Christmas and they were delighted with their album and didn't ask for any extra images so maybe that would work for you.

Can you burn him a disk of all the pics you are happy with him having and just sort of say that the disk has all the pics you thought he would be interested in and they are your favourite ones as well?

There are some pics of us kissing I wouldn't want people to have but then we didn't put them into our album but could print them off for another album if needed.

See for me that is the key part of the issue - if he paid then IMO he is the "owner" of the snaps?

My dad is paying for my TOG and I know it means I will have to compromise somewhere - I think it might mean having to have more pics with him and my step mom than i'd wanted - but, its a small price to pay for my dads happiness!

I think I'd feel the same. Although if you step back it doesnt sound such a bad request but if it was my OH's mum/dad I'd feel a bit weird.

Cant you just burn them a disc but just of the ones you think they should have i.e. family pics. Then see if he raises it again? I doubt he would as why would he want to ask for pics of your friends or smoochy pics of you two?

xxx

Hubby has already told them. They are coming over on Sunday and have just come up with a plan! When they ask for the disc I will tell them we haven't done it yet but have all the photos on the laptop and maybe they'd like to choose some to put on the disc as I didn't think they would want all the ones of my family and our friends. Then say the other reason we haven't done it is because we had all these lovely ideas for Christmas presents for them. If they still don't get it by then, well I just do the disc and hope for peace! I'm tired of being upset about it ☹️

However, i bet he wants them to make you books for xmas.... with your mates and smoochy pics..

Nah, that ain't right surely??! If a parent/Inlaws pay for the wedding or parts of it, does that mean they have carte blanche over that particular thing? Shouldn't make any odds whether he paid or not.

I think the tog is the actual owner of the snaps, officially like. Then I'd say next down the line, they belong to the bride and groom. Regardless of who paid for them.

Good luck Zippy!

I think your plan for the weekend sounds reasonable.

However, both sets of our parents have copies of all 850 (no typo there, we reallly do have 850 photos!) photos from our day. The chances are they'd never want that many but if they want to get any printed then they can pick and choose any they so wish.

I'm not saying that it's right (or fair) - but generally, if someone pays for something for you, then they have more "input" into it. Just my experience from reading posts on here.

I have given a disc to both sets of parents with all our images, about 400. To be fair there was only 4 of us there, so not a lot of people that they don't know IYSWIM.

However, we still plan to do photobooks for both sets of parents. xx

Its a bit of a hard call, because I can see both sides of the arguement, but one thing that would upset me was if he went out and got a cheap book made and it looked cheap / awful, I would feel that would really cheapen my day, specially when I'd spent out all that money on a beautiful photographer, to see them printed poorly would be really upsetting.

For that reason, I think, if I had the budget to get a professional album to give him, then I would.

I think I'd feel exactly the same as you. As per other posts I can understand why they might want pics of their son but the whole lot seems silly. Good luck when you see them! Let us know how it goes!!

I do think this opens a bigger debate though......(see new post!)

xx

Sorry but I don't see the problem. My folks wanted (and we gave) copies of all our photos, pro and guest. My dad likes to keep a running vault of photos and my mum loves going through them on her pc. I would have been delighted if the in-laws had expressed similar interest.

Maybe if you feel very strongly or there are some that are not flattering, just don't include them on the CD/ Hardrvie.

This is the other thing we are trying to tell him - we get a proper printed album from our photographer with 100 photos in, and are also currently collecting the guests photos so we can make a book on Photobox. We are making my mum and dad books on photobox and were going to also do one for them. They are talking about buying photo albums on BOGOF in Smiths.

I had a message on FB today from MIL saying that they ordered some prints from the TOG, They bought 10 for themselves, and bought 4 for stepdaughter who is 13, and not being funny, prob couldn't give 2 sh!ts about the wedding!! But she is their world (rightly so) and MIL wants to make her an album too. I think this is why she wants the disc. APparantly she has already used some photos that she had and I think she has spaces to fill. SHe says she wants the photos of the bridesmaid dresses hanging in the room and the shoes lined up on the floor. Personally I don't think this album will be appreciated by step daughter, and hubby is worried it will be seen by the ex as rubbing her face in it. But I doubt we can stop it. I am going to talk to her tomorrow. I don't think step daughter wants photos of shoes. We aren't even putting those in our album! However, I do have discs of some of the guests photos with step daughter on, so think I am going to offer those to her.

Thanks for all your opinions. More mixed than I thought. I thnk the paying fact will play a big part of this saga. but I'm in the paying doesn't neccesarily give rights camp.

I think for me, this is just another to add to the list of MIL's weird ways!!

For the sake of an easy life does it really matter if they have pictures of shoes/dresses? I can understand the kissing pics but when it comes to something as non personal as shoes being lined up I think you'd be better just giving them the images.

THey can have them! I just think step daughter would prefer ones of her!

Embrace it - my father wouldn't even come to our wedding

BTW - we regularly supply 800+ edited images ready to print - and yes we use DVD's nowadays, and we actually encourage B&G's to copy the disks regularly

Yeah, I think you're being pretty unreasonable!

Most togs have an online gallery where people can view all the images and could easily buy them all if they wanted! Both sets of parents want a copy of our photos, really doesn't bother me one bit. It's an exciting time for them and I'm glad they're proud and want to show us off!

I'd just be incredibly pleased that anybody loved us enough/enjoyed the day so much that they wanted the photos. I would never think twice about giving them to anybody, especially family. I know you were thinking of giving them as Christmas presents but you've got time to think of something else. When my sons grow up I'd be heartbroken if I was told I couldn't have pictures of their weddings :-(

We copied the disks for my parents, sisters and OH's aunt - the kissing ones made me cringe a bit, but there weren't any of us on the wedding night. Whoever said that who paid for it matters I actually agree with (as it happens, we paid for our own photos, but I think there's no way you can say that the person who paid for the disk can't have a copy)