Anyone feeling 'the pressure'?

I know exactly what you mean! Me and h2b had a chat about this the other week that we seemed to be a bit mor bitchy with each other as we felt like to everyone else we had to appear to be perfect. I think that it's probably normal

Mostly yeah.

A lot of people keep asking "so how long now" and "how are the plans" when actually there is more to us than the wedding and it would be nice for people to show a little bit of interest in the rest of our lives.

If we haven't told you how bits of the plans are going, its because we don't want you to know and want it to be a surprise.

I know exactly how long it is, thankyou; if you want to know you can look at the calendar and count the days yourself.

Weddings are actually very stressful things to plan, mostly because of pressure from other people, their expectations and how they think we should do things rather than us deciding. We haven't had "interfering parents" from either side, which is a big help, but because we're so organised we're now at the stage there isn't a great deal that needs to be done, and we're more stressing about making it look like we have things we still need to do so people don't think we've lost interest!

As much as I can't wait for our big day and to see my beautiful b2b in all her finery coming up the aisle to stand alongside me, I can understand why so many people elope or disappear overseas to get married in a small quiet ceremony!

Incidently, we're a month and a couple of days behind you.

I'm afraid that if I'm being totally honest, the answer is no, I haven't felt like that.

I hope this doesn't come out the wrong way... but your post reads a bit to me like it's YOU feeling this way rather than other people saying anything. 'Cos why would they know you'd had an argument, unless you told them? Or is this an occasion in public when one of you has maybe snapped a little at the other? Has anyone said anything to you directly, or do you just feel within yourself that things ought to be 'perfect' because you are getting married?

I know that H2B has his moments when he absolutely does my head in, but as you've said, I adore him and am so happy to be marrying him! Only my closest friends hear about it if he does annoy me, and they know me well enough to know what I'm like and they're realistic enough to know that's what couples are like.

Often it's the pressure of planning a wedding that causes a bit of friction but if you usually laugh it off a few minutes later, your relationship sounds perfectly healthy and robust to me! Correct me if I'm wrong Sam, but you have kids together don't you? You've already gone through a very life-changing event together and obviously become even stronger and better and planning a wedding.

I hope you feel better soon! ?

I understand what u mean! Me+OH banter/bicker / argue at least once a day - over silly things! Its very rare we argue over lifes fundamentals -were similar in that since. Were all human & none of us are perfect - we put ourselves under this uneccessary pressure. Last nite I went mental at OH for giving me wrong directions to togs house! Ur marrying your OH for his full package - 'warts' n all. X

Naughty! ?

I know what you mean I think. I've found that our disagreements upset me more, maybe because now we're getting married I think it feels more important maybe. Cause I know for sure that it's for keeps...

Oh yeah, it's definitely all coming from me and not from anyone else. It's like an intense paranoia that if we stop appearing like the perfect couple, people will think we shouldn't get married! Totally and utterly bananas, but it stops me grumbling to close friends if h2b has done something daft whereas normally if we were nattering about other halves and relationships, I'd chat away like the rest of my girly mates.

H2b thinks I'm bonkers too ?

Only seeing this!! Haha it does sound bad! If OH thought I was talkin about him like that he'd be feelin well macho lol