Are you having a gift list?

Personally I don't mind receiving a gift list or a note to say what someone would like as a gift if they are after something in particular. However, saying that we have decided not to. Like you say some people do take offence. Maybe consider your guests and whether you think they would be offended or not. If you think they'd be happy then go for it. Or if there's just one or 2 that you're not sure about you could leave theirs out?

I think it's a much more sensible idea to have a list, I'm sure your guests would rather buy you something you really want/need rather than guessing and getting you something you already have or isn't your taste . . . I'm envisaging multiple toasters . . . Hehehe! ?

My OH and I have lived together for a couple of years now in our own home so have most of the usual things that people would buy you as wedding gifts. We haven't discussed to a final point exactly what we're going to do/not do about a gift list, but we've discussed not having one or I did find a little poem somewhere that I might include in our invitations that says something along the lines of us preferring their company at our wedding to their gifts but that if our guests do want to get us anything then a contribution towards our honeymoon fund would be hugely appreciated. My best friend did this for her wedding gift list too a couple of years ago.

I'm sure whatever a couple decide to do regarding their gift list you'll still always end up with a toaster or two as people like buying presents.

We have decided not to at the moment. Most of our guests will be close friends or family so we are going to say to those that ask we would appreciate money or vouchers to help set up our first home together ?

We thought about it and decided we didn't really need a list as we'd be better off with cash or vouchers.

In the back of our invite pack, in small print, we put

The biggest and most enjoyable present you could give either of us is your attendance at our special day. However if you would like to contribute to either our deposit for a house or some Argos vouchers to help us furnish it once we get it, we will be delighted to accept your gift.

Hopefully it gets the point across that we aren't just inviting people for their gifts - after all, to get all the money we need for our deposit it'd work out as needing £150 from every person (including children) we invite, and I honestly can't see that happening.

There's nothing really we need. Lived together for four year so really the only things we need are a new shed, new bed, wardrobes, decorate spare room for a baby hopefully one day! etc etc and I'm pretty sure they wouldn't count as wedding gifts lol.

We're going to put a note in with our invites something to the effect of we need nothing but if they wanted to, money would help us in our new life as man and wife.

x

Me and the OH are currently moving in together... so will prob already have all the weddingy toastery gifts, by the wedding. Rather than a wedding list, i'm going to set up a honeymoon fund, so people can donate amounts towards the honeymoon, cos there is really not going to be enough money left over for much of one!! Good idea or presumptuous? not sure yet! :p

We're not having a gift list. We've pretty much got everything we need in our house. We've told people this but also said that if they did wish to make a contribution, we're asking for vouchers so we can decorate and do up the house.

I think it only gets rude when you put gifts on the gift list like BIG electrical items.. I had a gift list off someone like that lol ?

I have no idea what to do.. On one hand I'd prefer cash if people want to give a gift. But I don't want to seem a greedy moo. So may go for a gift list which gives the option of giving gift vouchers so that if we need bigger items we can use lots of vouchers for them. We've lived together a year but already have most things as we both had our own places before this. Suppose a few things could do with upgrading and I'm desperate for a panini press although H2B said a toastie maker is good enough (WTF!).

I would absolutely LOVE a gift list with Emma Bridgewater to get a full set of crockery and cutlery etc (with options of people buying just one plate each for example as it's very expensive for full sets of things!)

I don't mind gift lists when I'm a guest. But just couldn't bring myself to make one when it came to our wedding, So we didn't mention anything about gifts on our invites. On our website it says if they want to buy a gift then they can ask our parents for inspiration as they know what our lil house is lacking. Each to their own though ?

We set up a list with thomas cook for holiday vouchers. All of our guests have said this was a great idea and they wish they had done it for their wedding x

We're going to have a John Lewis gift list, even though we have our home together a lot of what we have crockery, cutlery, linen, etc etc are either hand me downs from our parents, or are quite cheap as that was what we were able to afford at the time we moved! We're going to ask for new linen and a nice dinner set and pans as we'd probably never get round to buying all these things ourselves.

I don't think its at all rude to have a gift list, I've never been to a wedding where they couple haven't asked for something even if it's cash. As someone who really cares for them I want to get them a gift on their special day, and I want it to be something that they really want!

I'm not having a list and hate shopping for house stuff so money is no good either. When people ask I'm just telling them I really just want them to be there. I cannot imagine accepting cash off people. If people want to choose a gift themselves then that's fine but I wouldn't expect one.

We are already having a house with our money only. As most of the guests will be family and close friends. We may asking
them for some vouches if they wish to do some contribution, which we are planning for home decoration.

No gift list for us, we have lived together many years now and dont need people to buy us things for the house. Some of our family have said they would feel funny not getting us anything so we have said they can contribute to our savings fund for a 3 week trip to Canada in 2012 and they were happy with that, we set up a paypal account so they can donate without having to actually hand over cash or a cheque etc. ?

We didn't have a gift list but if anyone asked we just said Vouchers would be great. That way we could buy exactly what we wanted & meant the guests didn't have to trawl through seeing what they could afford.

My mum said people expect to have gift list info with the invite! me think our close friends wil probably get us booze but a few of the oder guest will want to get us something off a list so we are going to do a small one.

we werent going to bother but we have decided too, strangely it was my CBM who said that when ever her family has christmas dinner or special ocassions, they use the'special plates & cutlery' which was a wedding pressie for her parents and she loves that! i thought it was lovely and i loved the thought of having wedding stuff that we will use with our children for years to come!!

also, apparently when you do a list at JohnLewis you get a voucher for tea and cake! that really swung it for me!

Most people will want to buy you gifts. If you don't have a gift list you will probably end up with duplicates or things that you reeally don't want.

I think nowadays the gift list is a normal thing to have and people expect that you will have one.

We asked for cash towards our savings for our house deposit and also had a gift list for those who wanted to buy us a gift. Our list was with House of Fraser and they have been brilliant. We didn't have a huge list, just things that we really wanted and it has worked out really well.

We didn't put a gift list with our invites.

The main reason being is that we are living with my mum until the wedding then getting our first house after so didn't really know what to put on a gift list so i just put "we are looking forward to setting up our martial home after the wedding. If you wish to give us a gift, money or gift vouchers would be greatly appreicated"

I didn't put a particular shop for vouchers as i thought it would be quite nice to get a mixture so we're not tied to one shop.

As a wedding guest I personally prefer a list or request for certain vouchers or money because it's easier for me! I don't want to have to contact the couple to ask them what they would like, or if they don't have any requests, have to give real thought as to what I should buy. What can I say - I'm lazy when it comes to wedding gifts! I can't understand those who think it's rude - I think it's just practical.

I'm happy to receive a wedding list (not in an evening invitation, though!) but since we've been in the position to think about what we'd like to do, the thought of sending one out to our guests leaves me cold.

If we're contacted and asked what we'd like, we're going to tell our guests we don't want anything. We don't need anything. If they insist, we'll suggest they either donate the money to charity (other people need the money more than we do) or that they buy themselves something/make a weekend of it.

What I would love from our guests would be a card with some heartfelt words in.