Bit of a rant about guests...Updated!!!

Maybe you should ask your OH to speak to the guy and say that you wouldn't have invited them to the whole day if you didn't want them there for the whole day.

I don't think you're being unresonable, if one of my friends partner's told me that they were only coming to the evening i'd be pretty gutted!

Haha, I thought of a VERY rude word when I read this - about her not you!

I don't think you've been stupid at all - if her OH means a lot to your OH then why shouldn't you invite them.

I'm actually wondering if she's jealous of you getting married.

Still, it means you can invite another couple of people - or put it toward something nice for you. ?

I'd be really, really annoyed if someone said this to me especially with all of the expense/trouble you go into in actually inviting and entertaining people all day and then to have it thrown back in your face isn't nice at all!!!

maybe you can use it to your advantage though and invite a couple of your friends that you couldn't fit on the guestlist before??

and i'd be glad that they aren't coming if they don't really want to be there in the first place xx

How rude! Who is she to dictate who you should and shouldn't invite to your wedding?!

If it were me I'd be tempted to email her back saying you're sorry she feels uncomfortable coming to the whole day but give her details of the evening reception, and then add that you'd still like her partner to come for the whole day if he is able to.

Dee that is super super rude of the girl. What you said makes perfect sense to me. I am actaully speechless that someone could be so rude. I have been to weddings with OH which i may never have met one of the party but OH is friendly with the groom or whatever. Dont feel stupid as far as i am concerned she is just being a c*w. Think it is worth getting M to speak to the guy though and explaining the situation. If i was M i would also drop in the she made you feel bad!

Thats a seriously weird way to respond to a wedding invite!

OH had a best mate when he was at college and then they were at college and then they lost touch for 10 years, then we bumped into him and his fiance in the sainsburys car park and arranged to meet for a drink. We met them once and got on really well and were suprised a few weeks later to get an invite to the whole day for there wedding. Our reaction was to be completly honoured to have been invited as I had never met either of them and OH hadnt seen them for 10 years.

Id leave them to just come to the evening and it makes room for 2 people that will appreciate it.

?

I'd get your OH to speak to hers and see if he wants them to go and make sure it's not just her saying no in all honesty. That sounds like an odd response to a wedding invitation!

I agree it's a strange response, how old is the baby, maybe she doesn't want to leave it with someone for the whole day and evening

What 3d jewellery said, if baby is under 1 maybe they cant get babysitter for day & evening, or dont want to leave baby for so long. Assuming baby not invited. I agree she was rude the things she said to your OH.

What a cow, personally i think its an honor to be invited to join someone on their wedding day.

Slightly off reaction. It's the type of thing you'd say in private but be happy to have been thought of so highly.

What did he say to her? He should of explained his reasons. There could be hidden reasons, possibly due to childcare but it may be worth him dropping his mate a line saying how disappointed he was that he couldn't make it for the whole day as they go back a long way, etc...

What an ungrateful witch she is ............

Being invited to share in somebody's wedding day is a huge honour and she should have had the manners to behave better. Leave it to them now, I certainly wouldn't waste time on asking them why the won't come all day, they had their chance and blew it !

Don't you feel bad for asking them xxx

Sorry for the late reply ladies.

OH just said thats why he did invite the guy, because he thought of him as a good friend. He said the guy just looked embarrassed and didn't say much.

Sorry, bit misleading about the baby, she's 4 now, so not exactly a baby! Childcare isn't a problem, both sets of parents regularly look after her if they have nights out etc and they're not bringing her to the evening reception, they said her gran would look after her.

I think she is just rude!!!

Updated in OP!

Oh Claire I would LOVE to do that! I think OH is actually quite glad that he's going though (and that they are friends afterall! ?)

I can't see how anyone would think that was funny though. I know they probably have no idea how stressful the guest list thing is, but still, I think they are wierd!

If I were you, I'd be seriously tempted by Claire's response, but...

It's probably not worth the upset and OH potentially losing a friend over. Perhaps she was the one saying about only coming to the evening and her OH has seen your OH's reaction and tried to take it back as such? Don't think I'm making much sense!

They sound vaguely insane. What a hassle! I hope they get you a b***dy good pressie now!

Your right, WTF?!?! Why on earth would anyone do that?!?! Its ridiculous!!! Lxx

Oh Dee no wonder you were boiling. Why would anyone think that was a laugh. I would be tempted to tell them you have already filled there space then once you see how they respond and feel about that just go aww i am only having a laugh or course you can still come all day!

Plonkers!

Weird or what

? Lou Im so tempted to do that! That would be so funny! Maybe they would realise that it really wasn't funny!

Im sure they are just wierd!

Its all v stressful isn't it???

Seems a v strange way to go about thanking somebody for an invitation to a wedding but there you go. At least its sorted now and you'll still have a fab day whatever