Bridesmaid Dress Help

Problem 1- pick what you want to do. My bridesmaid are all wearing the same, but I have seen picks of bridesmaids wearing different dresses, shades and colours and some look really effective. But ultimately its your choice. Obviously you want them to be comfortable. I can't understand why either would be bothered whether they wear the same or not as long as it suits them both. Although I've never been sure why some bridesmaids get so picky over the dress, when I've been bridesmaid it's always been up to the bride, I wouldn't have dreamed of insisting on anything.

Problem 2- I don't think its essential but it is nice if they tie in.

Problem 3- I'd just ignore this all together. The fact she's discussing this at all just sounds a bit like she's trying to out-do the other one.

I think it's completely up to you whether the dresses match or not. A friend gave swatches to the bridesmaids and asked them to pick a dress any style in that colour, which I may do as my bridesmaids are very different shapes and heights and it may prove difficult to find something that suits all of them. However I was thinking of a 50's style swing dress as I think it suits any shape

I personally will pick my dress first - I went dress shopping with a friend of mine and she found THE ONE but the colour of the dress *really* won't fit with the colour scheme she originally wanted.

Not sure what advice I could offer about your 3rd dilemma I'm afraid some people just run away with these things! group messages and pinterest boards have helped me make everyone feel equally involved. My most excited bridesmaid (who might not be able to make it to my wedding - devastated! :'( ) lives on the other side of the world! It's difficult with time zones etc, but she pins while i'm asleep and vice versa

Ok, simple answers:

Problem one: If you're paying for their dresses, then it's up to you - if they are paying, then let each of them choose their own dress and see what happens.

Problem two: I would definitely buy your dress first so you know what kind of style of dress you want them to have.

Problem three: Ignore it, change the subject if she brings it up and let her get over it. She wants to feel that she is the more important bm that's all.