bridesmaids

She's probably having the same worries you are, you could try sitting her down and explain you're really happy for her and that you don't want her feeling any pressure or stress throughout her pregnancy, say there'll be no hard feelings if she can't do it and you understand her situation. I'm sure she'll be honest and say if she doesn't think she'll cope with it all or feel like doing it. I'm sure a good chat with her will sort it all out

Thanks for the replies guys. I was just advised by the dress shop to bring my bridesmaid to the rest of my fittings. I've bought the dress (I went with my aunt and uncle) and have still got I guess 3 fittings (one to adjust the top, one to adjust the length and the final visit). I'm sure it would be fine for her just coming to the final fitting, but there is still the hen do and shopping for the bridesmaid dresses. She's due a month before the wedding. I just feel doubtful because of the way she told me... it seems that's she's not sure or not even too into it

My best friend is pregnant and due a few weeks before our wedding so I understand how you feel. However, I think you need to understand that your friends pregnancy and new born are going to be her priority not your wedding. Perhaps you should just sit down and tell her that you know what her priorities are and you don't want to pressure her into something else to think about and more than happy for her to step out of the bridesmaid role. She can still be a part of your wedding, but perhaps expecting her to organise hen dos and dress fittings might be a bit much? Maybe she's not said how she feels because she doesn't want to let you down. My friend is going to be my witness instead of BM. Could your friend do this or perhaps a reading instead?

Ah she'll be due baby before the wedding, I thought it was a month after sorry
It can definitely be done assuming her pregnancy goes well, with me I had very little sickness etc but I had high blood pressure and was prone to fainting etc so it's something i'd have been worried about with the hen night etc, but if she stays stress free and maybe if someone could take that task off her hands she could be fine to come for the fittings.
Maybe she's worried about things like how she'll look on the day after having baby etc, I know I was really self conscious with my baby tummy and weight gain so it may be something like that. Of course every pregnancy is different and she could be fine and healthy the whole way through and be able to do everything fine but on the other hand she could have sickness or other troubles that come with the baby package lol, and could be these things she's wondering about.
Have a good chat with her and try to get to the bottom of how she's feeling Could make it days out for dress fittings and some baby shopping too

I have been in the same situation as you.

My BM (and best friend) told me she was pregnant and due 3 weeks before the wedding. She insisted she still wanted to be BM but I did give her the option to back out. She lives 120 miles away so wasn't able to attend my dress fittings and I didn't expect her to. As for BM dresses originally I wanted them to have knee length strapless dresses but of course that is not practical at all for her so we have ended up with long empire line dresses with straps which look lovely. We brought it 2 sizes bigger and she has a seamstress on standby to get it adjusted just before the wedding. I have also told her to bring another dress to change into after the photots if she would be more comfortable.

She organised all of my hen weekend to Ascot and had a fab time despite being 8 months pregnant.

As you can see from my ticker my wedding is next week! The baby arrived 1 week over due (born last Sunday), she had a tough labour but is ok. When I spoke to her this week I again said that she doesn't have to be BM if it's too much but she still wants to and is looking forward to it. I have done everything in my power to make her feel comfortable and not burdening her with all of my wedding troubles. She's my best friend and she and her baby are so important that they come first!

Does she actually *need* to do all these things?? I'm guessing you want her to be your bridesmaid because she's very special to you, not because of the services she is meant to provide ;-)

If you're worried I would talk to her, and say you want her to be a bridesmaid and you'll do anything you can to make sure she feels comfortable doing it.

So, you could just do the hen party yourself, or ask another friend to do it (I organised my friend's hen party and wasn't a bridesmaid... didn't bother me).

Dress shopping for bridesmaid dresses could be done online... get them sent to her house for her to try on, or at least narrow down the range of dresses so shopping could be done in one day.

And for your dress, video cameras are a wonderful thing Get someone to come with you to final fitting, video all the instructions!

EDIT: That said, she has to feel able to do all this. You need to talk to her!

I am probably going to be pregnant when I am bridesmaid for my bridesmaid (She is 10months after us). She has already told me she expects me to be pregnant and we will just go with the flow depending on how I go

Just have a chat with her you will know then

Okay, so I've talked to my bridesmaid and she was nervous because she thought I'd be nervous, so she still wants to be my bridesmaid and we'll make things work I'm sure I can find some extra help for the dress fittings and hen do. I just got really nervous, because my day is going to be a bit up and down anyway seeing as both my parents have passed away... might not seem relevant to this, but everything is related to me when it comes to the wedding and I really don't want to be a bridezilla!

Glad you got it sorted out ! And sure she'll do a fab job of being there for you on your big day

Thanks!