Bridesmaids....

To be fair ive done a zombie run before and it was one of the hardest things ever - I collapsed and couldnt breath (im young, fit, healthy, normal weight etc...) it was like a extream bootcamp with the odd person in costume trying to grab you and everyone has to keep the same pace or is barrated by the people who are being held back

I love zombies but would NEVER do another one and its honestly not suitable at all for some pregnant or who has just had a baby... yes it should be stuff you like but you MUST consider your guests, their requirments and practicalities, if someone was pushing that on me I would drop out too

Sorry but I agree with the posted above, I think you're being a little bit demanding and maybe this has come across to your bridesmaids and subsequently thats why they seem to have lost interest a little bit. I think one of the nicest things about your hen party is all the surprises that await you and the fact that your favourite women have spent their time organising a weekend that they think you will love, I know it's hard to relinquish control (I struggled!) but I honestly think if you let go of your ideas of what you want your hen weekend to be like and just let them plan it for you, you'd be pleasantly surprised. Also, I mean this in the nicest way possible, but as brides we do need to remember that everyone does have their own stuff going on (babies, jobs, houses, other weddings, etc) so don't be disappointed if your bridesmaids don't seem as eager as you to plan things. If I were you I would just take a step back and say you're going to leave them to it and you can't wait to see what they have in store for you.

My hen is this weekend and it actually makes me a bit emotional to think all my lovely friends have been busy planning an amazing weekend for me.

HTH! Just some honest advice from one bride to another xx

Sorry to weigh in with the others, but you do have it a bit backwards. Your wedding is where you can be a little demanding and say "this is what I want", the hen party is where the girls plan something nice for you, you know like a surprise party to celebrate you getting married. Most brides don't get a say in the hen party, you can offer direction but it's up to them to plan it.

For example I've advised my MOH that I don't drink and have a low threshold for embarrassment, so getting trashed and seeing a stripper isn't for me. Although I've offered suggestions, the decision and the planning comes down to the girls.

A zombie run and time abroad does seem a bit much to expect from a new mother, though the other maid that's skipping out on the meet and greet does seem a bit off. Don't get me wrong, bridesmaids are a nightmare sometimes, but if you value the relationship it's not worth falling out over. Think about it, would you be like this if you were just planning a girls night out? Or would you be a bit more accommodating of people's circumstances?

The whole "it's my wedding!" Thing only applies to your wedding day.

The zombie run sounds awful, no wonder one of the BMs doesn't want to do it. If that's what you want to do then fine, but why do you need to do it for your hen do and force others to do it too? Also, 3 nights away is a big ask for some people. Expense, time of work/away from families, etc. I just think you need to be more considerate. I wanted everyone to ENJOY my hen do, so everyone had input and my sister and BM just made it special by doing little things that were to my taste etc.

I really wanted to do a zombie run but then two of my good friends fell pregnant and one is really scared about her baby's welfare so I'm not doing that anymore. Something more sedate and closer to home, something that means she won't be frightened or stressed. Lord knows I love all the girls who are coming and want everyone to have a good time, we're now doing crafts and not chocolate, babies born or in belies will be safe as houses and we can still have a laugh. Those of us without tiny tots on the way will then go out into town. Nothing spectacular but it should be fun.

As with everything if there isn't consensus nothing will get arranged and there's no point insisting on something that not everyone wants to do. One of the girls really wants to all do a zombie run so she and I are doing it separately later on in the year, after her baby is a little older. It's all about compromise and working together with your BMs so no one is resentful and everyone has a great time.

I hope that helps.

My two pennies worth - both myself and the bride-to-be organised three events each, to cater for those that couldn't do the main events (Portugal and Spain) but wanted to be part of the fun. The two non-abroad do's were local to us, involved food, drink, laughter and fun.

Some people went on all of them, some of just one, but either way it seemed to work!

Part of my hen party was doing my local parkrun. I let it be known that I was doing it but I didn't push anyone to do it with mme. In the end 4 others ran and 5 actually volunteered as marshals so they came along and were part of it.

Any kind of run is my idea of hell let alone a zombie run! 3 nights does seem a tad excessive too. Is it not far more important that they're all there at the wedding than the hen do? Aren't hen dos supposed to be fun? A zombie run sounds like hard work!