Bridezilla

Welcome back! You might find some people who remember you lurking around OT. In the mean time, I'm off to search your old user name and decide whether you deserved that Bridezilla award!

Well! We thought you had gone forever!

Hope all is well and yes a report would be fantastic - yours was the Game of Thrones venue wasn't it?

PS this has made me come out of hitched hiding so please don't let it be for nothing

P.P.S wedding number 1? Have you had another since?

The username definitely rings a bell! ?

And I remember that thread! I can't believe that was 2012 though, wowwie, where has that time gone!?

Welcome back

Graceyfly! Welcome back! Good to see you back, I always wondered how things went for you on the day!

Welcome back Graceyfly - I've seen your name around a couple of times ?

Ha ha I thought exactly the same but couldn't find any ?

I didn't meet you before, gracey - nice to meet you.

Hello and welcome back Graceyfly we thought you were gone forever

A report plus lots of flashes please, you have been missed.

Welcome back!

Awaiting flashes!

Wow there are so many familiar names here still - I am so glad to see you all.

I am on a new computer, but will soon get the wedding pics posted with a report.

Though as a a pre-report update

Context: I got married at Castle Ward which is a stately home in Northern Ireland. My first date - the 12.12.12 had to be changed due to Game of Thrones filming at that location on that date. I went to see the theatre with OH and it was lovely but OH wanted to see inside of the house and when we got there he fell in love with the reception room. We were told there were three rules with the reception area - no stilettos, no children and only 60 guests. This was due to the flooring. I made it clear to guests that whilst they could wear stilettos they would have to bring flats to the ceremony to wear vocally before sending out invites. Everyone was fine with this except my SIL who never wears stilettos (she is very devout christian and has funny ideas about make-up and stilettos) but she decided that day she was going to be wearing stilettos and made a fuss. So i reworded the invitations- stating - Children under 8 will be entertained during the ceremony in the 19th Century Playroom. Unfortunately stilettos cannot be worn in the ceremony venue. Those adults who turn up wearing stilettos will be sent with the other guests under 4 years who cannot read. " My SIL though wore flats on the day. There were a few female guests who did not come to ceremony due to the stiletto rule and just came to reception.

The mother, OMG, she really played up on the wedding day, to include

1. I was friendly with a cafe in my hometown that as a wedding present offered to make bacon baps for all the bridal party on the morning of the wedding and have them sent up at 8.30am sharp. My mother cancelled the order the day before. Then sent my BMs on morning of wedding, after their hair appointments when I had already gone on ahead back to house, at 10.30am to order exactly the same order, they were gone for over an hour and a half, with me not knowing what had happened, where they were and having no means to contact them as they had their mobiles with their partners at that stage or her admitting, when she got home an hour before them where they were. Leaving them an hour to get ready.

2. After my BMs and I were ready, my mother came into the room, asked how she looked and said she hated her lipstick, never mentioned how well any of us looked.

3. Told driver, that BMs were to go in my BM's boyfriend's old clanger of a car as she and her American cousins would be travelling in the second bridal car (Chauffeur though told her unless it came from me or the Groom he would not be taking her orders).

4. Stole my bolero, ran away with it that morning, my aunt then found her trying to iron it and was shouting at her for trying to burn it. My aunt then took over and I feel saved it.

5. Dressed my nephew up in a page boy suit and told people he was the page boy (I have a lot of neices and nephews on OH's side - 24 in all and so I stated that if they all were not involved that not one of them could be involved).

6. OH's Best Man had role to collect any cards wit money and keep them during the evening, he put them in his jacket, when not looking she stole them, and when leaving I asked to see her handbag - all the envelopes were inside.

7. She invited behind my back- with her own invitations, a couple of her friends who vocally were against my wedding as my OH and I were Catholic/Protestant wedding in Northern Ireland. So they turned up, I put them at the service table with the photographers and other people we hadn't invited but were invited by her. She told the couple that they could make a speech and say a prayer - to 'help the catholics see the light'. But this did not transpire of course, as the speeches came straight after the meal and before dessert and was specified there would only be four speeches

8. She told my dad he was not to make a speech and was going to have my brother do it instead, only when my SIL came up and asked how long my brother was to speak, did I catch on what happened. Told my father he was to make the speech as if he could do it for my brothers and sister, he could do it for me.

The best one yet to come...

My OH and myself in lift to go to bridal suite at the end of the night, she jumped into lift and stated she was coming up to see the Bridal Suite (she had a chance twice earlier that day with my MIL and then my SIL). I shoved her out of the lift and perhaps used a few swear words. Me and OH left the next morning at 7am as we had second night booked in the hotel but wanted to go up and collect our honeymoon stuff - apparently she came up to room at 8am and stood for 30 minutes knocking.

The second wedding thing - both me and my OH come from different religious backgrounds. I was Buddhist, my family Protestant and my OH and his family Catholic. So we had a politically correct wedding and went civil ceremony, so noone would be offended. Since then I realise I done this more for my family, and my OH has felt regret that he is not seen in the eyes of God as being married. After much soul-searching I decided to convert, after asking a lot of difficult religious questions that had originally made me convert to Buddhism and realised that not every Christian was brought up by pscyhopaths and decided February past, that in three years we would do the religious ceremony.

Oh Em Freakin' Gee. I wasn't around when you were planning this, but that post about all the things your mother did, just wow... And all that on one day, not even spread out over a few months of planning, all on the same day! I'm not surprised you pushed her out of the lift and swore at her!

Dare I ask, do you still see her much?

Welcome back! I'm hoping the 2nd ceremony isn't as stressful as the first for you!!

Ey?!?! Wow! I thought my family were a bit mad.

I hope you had a good day anyway. Welcome back and i hope your second ceremony will be less stressful and more fun.

Wow! I thought my Mum could be difficult!

Hope you have a fantastic and stress free 2nd wedding

Will your Mum be at this one?

Welcome back! I think I'd have seriously fallen out with my mum if she'd behaved as yours did!

Thank you for all your comments.

I see my mother as little as possible. I only maintain a form of civil relationship with her in order to facilitate a relationship with my father

And no, she won't be at the next one as she does not approve of the religious ceremony that is not dictated by her. So am looking forward to this one, I am having a small occasion with a ceremony followed by a meal in a restaurant and a few drinks, and a grecian styled dress.

Truly speechless at your mothers behaviour!!!

Unfortunately, as had been apparent on the board in the months leading up to it, none of it actually came as a surprise. A lot of my wedding planning took the format of thinking two steps ahead of her and people, such as my OH's family thinking I was paranoid, but she even managed to stump me on the day with stealing the money, the car situation and trying to come up to the bridal suite.

What did you say when you found the money? More importantly what on earth was her excuse? Was she 'looking after it for you'.

glad to hear you'll get a more relaxed second wedding.

My mother does not offer explanations, she gets this smirk and then walks away without speaking. You end up having a stare out with her. The best course of action is to tell my father which I did and then he waits until a quiet time, a day or so later and will bring it up to her, but I don't think he has much more success than myself.

I'm sorry for you. that sounds difficult! I'm not surprised you don't see her. Your dad must be very patient.

Youre very gracious too. I would have lost it and asked her to leave.

Report on it's way soon. Got a new computer, so case of just going through boxes from my father's house and getting them uploaded onto this one :-)

It will not surprise you to note that my mother knows nothing about the next wedding. It does feel as though I have a quarter of the planning to do this time as I don't have to pre-empt her nonsense.