Hiya everyone,
So it's coming up to a year to go and so plans are starting to move along but the subject of my name has come along.
I was adopted when I was 9 (I am now 25) and so changed my name from my birth name to my adopted name. Due to this, I feel as though I have only just got my identity and although I want to acknowledge mine and my OH marriage - I do not want to lose my identity.
I have spoken to my mum who has suggested both double barrelling to both acknowledge each other and I thought it was a great idea and one of my original options.
Before I spoke to my mum, I asked my fiancee. He said he's not bothered if I change my name or not but finds double barrelling it pretentious and a mouthful which I found to be quite hurtful as I feel as though he is saying that having a double barrell name is silly.
I know it's my personal preference and he isn't being 'personally attacking' but he comes from a family who are very traditionalist and I come from a single parent female dominated family and am trying to hold onto my identity.
I told him if I kept my surname (Mattinson) and he kept his (Parkins) or I double barelled then any children would automatically take both anyway and he just kept avoiding the facts and homing in on the fact that it is not done nowadays and the woman should take the mans.
When we first became engaged, the first thing his mum said was 'you're going to be the next Mrs Parkins' which got me excited and cross at the same time because she assumed that I would just be taking his name but excited because we're getting married. I do love him, I just don't understand his ways sometimes (which seem quite sexist and pedantic in the arguments he makes)
Am I overreacting? What is/has eveyone done?
Sorry if this thread has been done before 
Cheers
Emx
