couple of daft questions about the evening do

Mr Ash's sister's wedding had a group dance on arrival. This was not the first dance, but helped break the ice.

We had background music on for dinner then dance music thereafter.

At weddings l have been to then people have had music on in the background before the 1st dance. As you said otherwise the silence would be a little odd?

I think you bustle up your train when you feel like it, probably when it starts to drive you a bit mad and you are worried about people standing on it!

Are you having a live band or a dj? Our DJ played music quote softly as peoe were arriving and judged for himself when to turn it up and get the party started! We asked for our first dance to be at around eight and found that people waited for us before they got on the dance floor but it all happened rather naturally. I don't know if it would be different with a band though.

as to your dress, again I think it will happen naturally, as and when you think it's time x

Our DJ started at 7 and we had our first dance at 8ish. Think it just wasn't full volume. I really wish I'd bustled my dress earlier! I didn't do it until after the first dance, but it would have been better to do it before! And I'd forgotten how pretty it looked all bustled up.

The dj usually plays right from the start of the evening do. The adults usually stand around chatting and some of the younger kids will go on the dancefloor.

When it's time for first dance the dj will announce it and everyone gathers round to watch. Usually there is up to 1 hour between the evening do starting and first dance.

Your dj will make the call. They read the room, it's part of their job.

Our started at 7, first dance at 8. He just played background music and the couple of toddlers we had there had a boogie and stared in wonder at the pretty lights!

I bustled my dress up straight after pictures. It did my head in and everyone kept treading on it!

Thanks for the responses. We have a band playing 9-9:45 and 10:15-11pm. We are doing our own music from Spotify through the laptop before and after the band and in the interval. What would you class as 'background music' then? Not really sure what to go for, would you say quite modern songs you would hear in a pub/club? Or should we go for 60s/Motown until the first dance then make it more clubby? We are doing 'cheese' in the interval then house/drum and bass/90s club classics after the band have finished for the hard core who will stay til the end (2am!)

I don't actually have a clue what kind of stuff he played as I was greeting the evening arrivals but it was audible but not party loud.

Your DJ/Band should have background music for guests to arrive to. I'd schedule their start time for 7pm so they know.

Or, the venue could have some sort of background music that they can play through their PA?

In my experience people generally wait for the first dance before getting up themselves, the first dance usually gets the party started.

My band aren't a wedding band so they won't have their own music to play before and after their sets. The venue doesn't provide music. So we are doing it ourselves. May start another thread just about music...

I hadn't even thought of the music before the first dance issue, thanks for the tip-off. We are having a DJ but he should hopefully set up behind closed doors, with the doors opening for the 'big reveal' in time for the first dance. I will speak to the OH regarding whether he thinks we should have silence before the first dance or whether it is a good chance to have some of his fave indie tunes playing (tunes that people like but can't really dance to).