Dealing with stress - any tips?

I've been going through this recently. I finally managed to get rid of my worst symptoms by going to a really good massage therapist who released the tension stored in my muscles, which led to all sort of physical symptoms. I'm also watching my breathing - when I'm stressed I tend to have shallow breathing so I'm making sure that I breathe properly whenever I can.

I hear you on both the IBS and sleep problems - with the latter (I get the classic 4-5am wakings, can't get back to sleep at all until 15 mins before I have to get up) I get up after I've been lying awake for 10 mins or so and read a book/listen to the radio rather than lying there getting more and more stressed. I often then fall asleep over the book or radio. I also find that the time I wake up isn't affected by the time I go to bed, so I sometimes go to bed early with a book - if I sleep 10pm to 4am that's six hours, less than optimum but not too awful. Easier said than done if you're busy though.

As for the IBS, I can only sympathise rather than offer any advice - it feels like a vicious circle really as the IBS makes one more stressed (does me anyway). I do find peppermint tea helps but I'm sure you'll have tried that already.

Can you take any time out?

Indulge in some good books, watch some rubbish tv

Be careful what you eat but I'm sure you are with the ibs anyway

Speedy get well vibes for you and your knee ?

Thanks all. I do just get up if I'm awake at 5.00am - no point lying in bed worrying about things. I drink mint tea by the truckload, eat a very healthy diet, no caffiene, no processed foods. I think I will try a massage though - good idea. I might see if i can get one booked this weekend.

I am going on holiday in two weeks - 7 days in Santorini. Unfortunately my boss has managed to make me feel guilty about taking the time off, which is nice.

Other than that, I think it's a case of suck it up I suppose.

I've been fairly stressed/anxious recently and have found a few coping mechanisms that help. they haven't taken away the source of stress, but help me deal with it a bit better.

i'm running, which helps a lot. part of it is the time out i get and the chance to just clear my head. i also get this from having a bath and reading - it just gives my brain a break from racing and constantly thinking over the problems/stress.

i use one of the neal's yard rollerball remedies - "relax" - and spread it liberally over my wrists every time i go to the toilet or leave the office. i love the smell and it calms me down when my brain goes into overdrive or if i start up breathing shallowly/stressed breathing.

i try and take deep breaths - really consciously focus on my breathing rather than shallow breathing or gulping for air which happens when i'm stressed.

none of these are long term solutions, but i find it just gives me something else to focus on and relax my brain a little - even if it's just for 5 minutes - which helps break that particular cycle of going over the problems and helps me take a step back from the stress so that it doesn't get a chance to relentlessly build. i hope you find a way to deal with it - stress sucks. and @rses to your boss for making you feel guilty for holidays - i understand what that can be like.

When I get insomnia it's either because I'm not using my brain enough during the day or I'm using it too much in the evenings. Television and the internet are really bad for unwinding my brain so I know when I get like that I need to switch them off and read. Preferably in the bath.

Can you walk comfortably with your knee? or is that painful too? We have started going for a walk for an hour or so each evening, after dinner, at about 10pm, and then going straight to bed when we get back, so no TV, no internets, no computers, no work, just peace, quite and each other. We've only been doing it for a week, but it has made a significant difference already to my sleep patterns. (plus we saw a fire salamander the other night, which I have never seen before)

? it sounds like you're having a hell of a time, Wonks. I know I always say this, but are you able to walk at all? A wander down the river on a beautiful day is a fab stress-buster. Alternatively, you're welcome to come and join us on Tooting Common this weekend to feed the swans - I defy anyone to feel stressed after doing this.

I know I keep banging on about it, but Neal's Yard Lemonbalm & Skullcap tincture, 2ml 3 times daily in a bit of water, has been an utter lifesaver for me. I feel like a different person. Also lemonbalm is used in some countries as a treatment for IBS, and I have found that my IBS has really calmed down on it. I'm feeling so much better I've cut it down to twice a day now, morning and bedtime.

Also, when I'm having a period of difficulty sleeping, I use a few drops of lavender essential oil, mixed in a carrier oil, in a warm bath about 30 minutes before bed. I also put a few drops of lavender in an oil burner in the bedroom and let it burn for about 15 minutes before bed. Seems to give me better sleep.

Thanks all.

My knee is on the mend, so I'll be trying a bit of gentle cardio this evening. Running is defintely off the agenda for the foreseeable though. I hate not being able to properly exercise - I'm a stupidly active person, so the minute I can't, my stress levels go up.

Sophie - I love doing things like feeding the swans, thanks so much for the sweet offer. This weekend we're going for a picnic with Mum and s-Dad at the Isabella plantation in Richmond Park to see the azealeas (I know I've spelt that wrong) in bloom. Mr W and I often go for nice river walks together in the evening, such a nice way to round off the day.

I'm going to start having a lavender bath before bed - though falling asleep isn't a problem, it's the waking up too early that is. I shall read in bed rather than watch TV though.

Katchoo, thanks, I'll look into that.

Cant help on the IBS front but with the sleep, is your room dark and cool and quiet?

If not is there anything you can do to change that? Ive been waking up early as well and I find it happens more so when the mornings are light (therefore causing the birds to be noisy)

That sounds lovely, I love Azaleas. My parents live in Azalea Way and they have lots of them in their garden.

I hope your stress levels improve soon. My IBS gets horrendous when I am stressed. Book that massage soon.

Take care ?

Yep, all of the above - I have thick curtains, have the window open and am at the back of the house. To be honest, I'm normally fine it's just my current stress that's causing this problem I think.

Just seen your other post Wonks, not surprised you are stressed.. Sorry to hear it and hope it all works out ok

A massage and a lavender bath sound lovely and relaxing

Wonkle ?. a good yoga teacher should be able to show you lots of modifications to avoid stressing the knee - i too have a dodge left knee, and although it still twinges sometimes yog has improved it massively (i injured it running in my pre-wedding weight loss / stress / illness which i'm sure you remember ?)

but it may take a few weeks of regular classes before yoga significantly reduces stress, tbh. it depends whether you feel you want to try other avenues first, but i wouldn't dismiss giving it another go - maybe with a different teacher? - if things haven't improved in a few weeks / months.

? you are one of my fave hitchers, i hate to see you sad.

Oh wonks, I'm another who hates to see you stressed. ?

Are you twitchy stressed or exhusted stressed? If you're the exhusted type could you try some meditation? I find focusing your mid can be very calming.

I usually get twitchy stressed, and when I was suffering from stress last year I became a bit dependant on kalms ? This is from someone who though they were a waste of time and money in the manner of weight loss pills ? actually I find them to be very good and have since discovered they are made from a herb which has bee found to dramatically reduce the symptoms of stress, abeit that Kalms have them in a low dose. You can get higher doses vbut they are expensive. I'm trying to think of the herb.. Valerian? anyway wortha go.

My BF finds charcol tablets a life saver for her stress induced IBS, but I knwo you've suffered for a while so have probably tried them.

Mrs Winkle I just saw your reply on my thread, I really feel for you ?

I have had the same, sleep is a no no, didn't eat at first but now I am again I am trying to be healthy.

I have been having lots of long baths, that helps. Rescue remedy is getting me through the super stressed bits to be honest and actually trying to go to bed earlier with a good book. Having worked pretty much every evening since the end of last year to now not doing anything I thought I would be pretty tired but I am having the opposite!

Have you allowed yourself a good cry? I know it helped me no end just to let it all out and be, I dunno, feeble for a couple of hours. That and a dirty burger afterwards ?.

I second the others with the walking, reading lots of good books as well.

An thinking good thoughts for you....x

I think Kalms are good aswell. Ive not been on Hitched much, so havent been keeping up with your posts. When I get stressed I try to concentrate on my breathing while thinking about the hebrew phrase "This too shall pass" and using it as a kind of mantra. It reminds me that what evers upset or stressed me shall pass, or things will get easier in time.

Im not religious in anyway, but it seems to work for me most of the time. ?