Debt

What would your suggestion be though? Just to never have a family?

We have a few grand on credit cards, where we've booked holidays or put wedding things on there where we don't necessarily have that much income in one go. We have a fair chunk of income left at the end of the month, most of which at the moment is going towards wedding stuff, but once that's over, we'll pay it all off.

Not at all, but would it not have been possible to curb the spending if you knew you wanted a family ? We get married in July, we've talked about having a family, and if we are lucky enough to be able to have children then we'll want to try to start one next year.

We've planned for this by saving maybe a little more than we normally would have done, we've got our 'family fund' there ready ! - I suppose its just about organising and planning ?

I don't have a mortgage but hopefully will do soon haha.

I also don't have an overdraft or any credit card debt. We do have a credit card but pay it off in full every month.

I do however owe almost £30k to the Student Loans Company thanks to living in London ☹️ I don't mind that though as it's less than a hundred quid each month to pay off and I don't feel it 'affects' me (although like FTLOMB I might feel differently when it's paid off... assuming it ever is!).

Panj, cut up your credit cards and only use your debit card. As soon as your money comes in move it to a separate account for bills/regular expenses, so the money available on your debit card is all you have to spend. Can your H help you by keeping you on the straight and narrow? I completely sympathise, as I tend to spend whatever I have and find it difficult to say no to myself.

As I said at the start its not a personal attack, as I know how precious some of you get about comments on an internet forum.

I think JoJo has got it right with what she has said.

But saying that there will always be peopel happy with always being in debt etc etc etc,

Don't have a mortgage and no other debt for me, I have a credit card but always pay it off before I get any interest charges. We use it to book holidays and things.

H had quite a lot of credit card debt when we met and I've made him pay them off - final payment was last month woo! He also has a small loan for his car that I wasn't overly happy about (he went to the bank without mentioning it to me!) but the repayments aren't bad and come out of his wages so don't really affect me.

I have quite a poorly paid job but have always been a bit of a saver so I have a fair bit put away to hopefully buy a place one day, but I need H to start handling his money better before we can consider it.

I'm a little old school and I dont buy something unless I know I can afford to pay for it out right, just the way I've been brought up really. I had to wait 18 months from passing my driving test to gettting a car, I had a full time permant job but it would never cross my mind to get a loan, cause once you start its just a slippery slop.

We have a mortgage but its buy-to-let so at the moment with tents in the property thats not an issue. I've never gone into my overdraft and I've never not paid my credit card off at the end of each month. And its not cause I make a fortune, my miseraly £15k just gets stretched along way.

I think people just have different priorities now, they think its essential to have Sky, fancy mobile, gym membership, buy lunch every day. I know there are certain times when there is no other way than to get a loan but to me that would have to be a last resort.

I have no debt either. no mortgage, no loans and my credit card is paid off every month by direct debit (it's a cashback once, hence I use it and they pay me!)

I would be worried by debt and haev enough anxiety in the other areas of my life!

Those who are fortunate to have saved for their "family fund" well done. Unfortunately some people are not in a position to do that.

This annoys me also, I hope I'm not out of place saying this, but an absolute c*** for doing what he has done to you.

I have £250 i need to pay off my credit card, that's my debt. And that is down to my H.

We didn't save for our family, H didn't even have a job when I fell pregnant with our youngest.

Nobody on OT gets precious.?

Anyone else remember an old hitcher throwing her toys out of the pram about invasion of privacy when I asked about savings and budgets before?! ?

We have our mortgages and whatever else the husband and I have spent this month. We tend to use our joint credit card for virtually all spends and then pay it off when either one of us gets paid.

We've both chosen deferred debit cards, rather than credit cards, for our businesses too.

That's why we have a CC, we get points which turn into vouchers. We'd be spending the money anyway so may as well get something back for it.

I agree it's interesting to hear how everybody manages their money. We have one joint account which we both get paid into and I have set up a complicated system for stashing money away... we have another account to pay the bills from (council tax, travelcards and rent) plus various savings accounts. We each keep about £500 in single accounts for emergencies and we have our ISAs which can't be joint (although they'll be going into a house deposit soon).

I have absolutely no idea how much money Boy has in savings accounts, ISAs, etc. That's not to mean it's "far too much, dahlink", I just simply don't know. I suspect he has no clue about my finances either. We pay the same money into a joint account each month and anything else is spent/saved as we see fit.

Quite, JoJo. YOu can answer the things you want.

A DDC works in a similar fashion to a credit card in that when you spend the money it gets chalked up on your tab, rather than immediately out of your account (a la debit card). It all gets paid off in one go, say month end, unlike a credit card where you have more time (albeit with interest).

I have had debt all my life and thankfully almost finished paying it off. We hope to have some savings before starting a family but if it had happened sooner then so be it, we would have dealt with it. Not everyone is always in a position to plan everything to the nth degree. I currently pay my car finance and we have our mortgage, but I don't see those as 'debt' in the same way I saw my overdrafts and credit cards, I see that more as a service such as a mobile phone contract.

I don't know exactly what OH has in savings (a fair bit I suspect) but he knows that I have zero savings ? we alsso have our wedding fund savings, which after Aug will be our holiday fund and then our future family fund.

So what are the advantages of it over a standard debit card? It's easier to track a monthly total spend?

Seems a bit OTT if they sat there at the table doing it, but I guess it worked for them. If we eat out we either put it on the joint debit card, or one of us pays and the other will pay next time, or one of us will transfer half the money over later on if it is a significant amount.

I've never had a CC because I don't think i could trust myself with it and I get really anxious if I owe money, it would really keep me up at night. I have always been a saver and have been given a few fair amounts in inheritance which I have relied on when my salary is not enough. OH has been unemployed for a year so I have been dipping into this a lot and watching it go down is depressing because I always imagined I would use this for a house deposit. OH is terrible with money so I have to be organised for the both of us! I dont want to have children before I own a house but this isn't always an option, and certainly if it wasn't planned there is no way I could buy now.

Easier to track my monthly spend, it makes more cash available to me at certain times of the month (ideal with clients who are tardy with payment) and because it's supplied by Mastercard I get the benefit of a standard credit card on purchases over £100.

Just a mortgage here

That said, I try not to judge people who are in debt. Life is expensive and you never know what is around the corner. I've seen even the best 'savers' end up in trouble because of unexpected job losses, followed by an expensive bill etc etc. Sometimes life just throws these things at you. It's nice to have money put aside for such occurrences but it's not always possible.

I do get frustrated at a couple of friends who continue to shop for clothes life there's no tomorrow when they have bills unpaid though. But it's not my place to say. It might be the only fun they have. Just because I would manage differently, doesn't make it my place to say unless they ask.

Totally agree on the 'invasion of privacy point' - I just don't answer when I don't want to, or only give the amount of information I feel comfortable with. Even then, that's generally down to the fact Hitched forum posts are so google-able.

Does this not make it even more important to have a slush fund?

Yes definitely, but I guess what I'm saying is that if you go through an unexpectedly prolonged period where you're taking out of it rather than putting in, debt happens. I would like to think most people try to keep rainy day savings and avoid debt but just for some it might not be possible.