Devastated. :'(

No, nothing to do with that. A witness watches the ceremony take place, and signs the wedding license to declare that it did. The only reason they would ever have any further duties is if one of the spouses were to deny in court that a wedding took place. In religious terms, "since marriage is a state of life in the Church, certainty about it is necessary (hence the obligation to have witnesses)".

This ^^^^

Also I don't get why you think she was being insensitive? Have i missed something?

She had a tough call to make. She made the tough call and that's that.

If you're referring to the witness thing, I guess that's a misunderstanding between you and her. She interprets the 'role' of witness differently to you. No biggie...

Glad you made up though.

She was insensitive? Really?

Hmmm from what you've reported... I don't think she was being insensitive. She was being honest! She was just wasn't telling you what you wanted to hear.

I can understand why you thought she was being insensitive - when I first read your quote of her reply to the Whatsapp I thought it was a bit harsh - but then when I read the rest of the sentence, I think it was meant more as a "that doesn't sound like it will be too difficult", not "that doesn't sound very important".

I think you're both just preoccupied with the major events which are going on in your own lives at the moment. Maybe when she comes up you could each make it a rule that you have one day a week (starting from one of the days when she's at yours!) where neither of you mentions weddings or babies? That way, not only does it reduce the risk that either of you will drive the other mad with constant wedding/baby talk (been there, done that, been threatened with a gag unless I shut the hell up lol), it makes sure that you both have some time out to focus on the other stuff going on in your lives, have normal friendship gossipy time and stop you from going mad with the wedding/baby stress.

[Edit: Just to clarify, I mean that you could make the rule when she comes to yours but that it applies even when she's back home and you're just texting or Whatsapping each other]

My best friend is my bm and she has a 5 month old baby and is breast feeding and I can say when she first got pregnant she said no to me too, however when I asked her again a couple of months later she was like 'of course!!!' She has been with me whilst trying on dresses, shopping, hair trails... My friend is quite serious and thinks and over thinks on things and worries but I have just not pressured her into anything. I'm letting her change her dress after the photo's so she is more comfortable and for ease of breast feeding.

Give your friend some time to get used to being pregnant she may change her mind and realise how much it would mean to you, however if she doesn't be your bm she will always be your friend Xx

Is your friend my friend? x

On your last thread about this I suggested that you just wait a while before worrying about it as between now and then a thousand scenarios could occur. You are really caught up in the excitement of the wedding righ tnow which is lovely but you'll run out of things to plan by next April at this rate. Why not postpone the whole bridesmaid/readings/witnesses thing until then: you'll still have plenmty of time to get dresses and arraneg ayour hen night. By breaking down the process into chunks of time and assigning tasks to each one you can keep the momentum going.

A newborn takes 24 hour care: by five months she'ss be feeding more regularly and a routine will be established. You may find that she's much more able to participate than she imagines, but for now, you must respect her decision.