Did you have any friends you were borderline about inviting?

We were being very strict about numbers with ours, mainly as we were very restricted on space. In the end though we relaxed about it and decided if there were extra people, we'd fit them in somehow. As it happens, some people couldnt come, some dropped out (2 on the day before, but not their fault as it happens), so if youre only talking 4 people, Id invite them as in the end you will probably only end up with the numbers youre expecting to have anyway (hope than makes sense, Im rambling now!)

Hmm - I have an issue with a couple of good friends that I think i can only invite to the evening. I'm gonna wait and see what happens when I send the full day invites out - although they're bound to find out, so I still haven't worked out quite what to do!

We've had to be super-ruthless with numbers because our venue is fairly teeny. We're only inviting people that have made the effort to see us/get in contact with us in the last year (off their own backs rather than in response to us getting in contact with them) - with the exception of people who live abroad.

On another note, I've been astounded at how few people can actually be bothered to make an effort when you're not on Facebook... (a conscious decision, I'm not a troglodyte ?). You really discover who your true friends are.

Ultimately, will you miss having those people at your wedding? And are they good friends to both you and H2B? If the answer's yes to both of these, you probably should invite them!

Hope this helps.

It's not uncommon to have an A) list and a B) when it comes to invites - as long as you aren't too public about it.

I would say hold fire on inviting them just now, and wait to see if half a dozen or so people from the A-list can't make it (you can usually expect about a 5-10% drop rate). Then just drop their invites round by hand as they live so close.

Theres was someone there we didnt want but as their partner was attending we had no choice. The gossip I heard in regards to once we left the wedding reception didnt surprise us and left us a bit embarrassed for other guests. This person is an arse in the truest sense of the word....*sigh*.

I would hang fire till you get a few 'cant comes'.....then slot them in

I've got the same problem! got a few friends i was reallyyy close to during my masters (which i finished June 08) and since then we have gradually grown more out of touch. we still live in the same city and i am very fond of them when i see them, but i don't know what to dooo. also they are MY friends, they have met my OH but don't really know him, so it's purely my decision whether to invite them. am only thinking of inviting them to the evening do, so not as big a dilemma as yours!

i'd say wait for some drop-outs, there are bound to be some. also if you are close enough to talk about the wedding and see them now and again, i would feel weird about not inviting them too, esp if u can afford it and have the space... i guess the more people around to share your special day the better?

Thanks for your thoughts. Problem with leaving is that I need the final headcount this weekend!! I only made the invites on Sunday and sent/gave them out yesterday. I'm doing the whole wedding in a couple of months you see. I should just mention that they don't know OH at all, one has met him a couple of times the other has never met him!!

Decisions, decisions........

I have a fair few of these friends and as we are having an evening do most of them will be invited to that, (although some wont be invited at all) but to be honest if i was in your situation (the all day thing) then i probably wouldnt invite them. x

If you're thinking about it this much then it means it would upset you not to have them there. If numbers are fine then go for it. I suspect you'll get a few no's anyway.

What Mrs Spink said. It sounds like you would miss them not being there and its better to invite four extra as you will probably get a few drop outs.

Some of my best friends my OH has only met a couple of times. This is due to the fact that we live in different parts of the country and life just gets in the way of arranging get togethers. I would feel really upset though if they weren't at my wedding and one is in fact my bridesmaid.

My bridesmaids live miles away too! They have never met! Hopefully going to do a meet up after christmas sometime (i don't want they to meet half way down the aisle!), My OH has met them all, i live with one at uni, one is my friend from home who's to blame for me and my OH getting together and the third is my 3 year old niece!