Did you talk to your OH about getting engaged?

This was always more important to OH than me, he kept on about it, got me looking in ring shops for months and never actually did it.....We were still looking in jewellers windows and I decided I'd had enough - I was waiting and waiting and felt he'd somehow managed to get me in this state of anticipation all the time, almost as if I was badgering him about it - when I was never bothered before.

So I told him, I love you and want to be with you but if you want to get engaged get on with it before the end of the year or don't mention it again because we are fine as we are. So he chose a ring himself and did it. Does that sound harsh?

We have talked about it to some degree and like Carrot said, the converstations are along the lines of "It'll happen one day" but one day just never comes. I suppose it makes me feel like we are just drifting along as I know OH wants ultimately be married and have kids, and if that is going to be to me, then whats holding things up? It's brought it to the forefront of my mind as I went out with my friends and her social group the other week and they are all married and all have children. As I say we've been together 5 and a half years, I can't afford to be drifting for another 5 and a half years as I'll be 38 by then and having kids may not be an option (or would be a harder option iyswim). To coin a phrase I just fell like it's time to "poop or get off the potty" ? but I also don't want to have to cojole/coax/bully him into doing it. I don't know, I want it all don't I and thats not going to happen.

We had talked about it when discussing what sort of things we wanted from life. We basically agreed that while getting married was important to him, it was less important to me but I did want a nice sparkly ring?

Then we sort of fell into it on our first anniversary when H said something (I can't remember what) and I said 'Is that a proposal?' and he said 'Yes, I suppose it was!'?

We then agreed that we wouldn't tell anyone as H wanted to get me a ring first. We got that while we were in New York for my 30th birthday and he did an 'official proposal with ring' then and we announced it when we got home.

We got engaged 2 years after we got together, we would have got married had we not been at unis at different ends of the country. We'd always talked about marriage from about 7/8 months in so when the conversation came up we decided it was a plan, not much help to you because we didn't get married until 4 years later when we'd both finished at uni.

The proposal wasn't especially showy romantic, but thats not really our thing anyway, is that what you want or is it the engagement? What's stopping you asking him?

We has talked about it a bit and I knew he was happy to marry me but he hated the idea of a wedding. We actually got enggaged when I pointed at a ring I liked and he went in the shop and bought it (after a little discussion as he felt it was too cheap at £75 but I loved it and I would of hated wearing anything expensive). We'd been together just over 8.5 years and got married 15 months later when I was 32 and he was 29.

Talk to him about it. I think one of the reasons we went so long before marrying was becuase I didn't make my feelings clear but in the end I really had nothing to worry about.

I think you really need to have a talk with him about it. He's probably a lot less aware of the biological clock and what another few years might mean babywise than you are so he probably needs a little prod to get it back off the back burner in his mind. You know he wants to marry you so I don't think a nudge that he ought to get on with it if he wants kids is nagging, it's just realistic.

I know he wants to be married, I suppose that's the question in my mind - is it me that he wants to be married to? Maybe thats why I don't push it.

We got together and talked about it generally as in , what do you want from life kinda conversation. The early part of our relationship was a bit of a whirlwind and after 4 months we were living together and when we had been together 11 months he came flying down the stairs and sat on the floor in front of me whilst I was on the sofa watching eastenders. I told him to get out of the way and he said just look at me for a minute and asked me to marry him and produced a ring!! It was randomly romantic!

The inspiration for the there and then was that it was his mums Bday who sadly passed away before I met him so the date was special to him and he felt like it was a way of involving his mum in something that she couldnt be part of.

I had nothing to do with the ring and it was perfect ...I couldnt imagine anything less romantic than having to pick my own ring.

We talked about it within a week (had known each other for 18 mths) when he asid that he has dreamt we were married 2 nights after we got together. That spooked me so we said nothing for 2 years then in conversations we talked about the future and that it might play a part. We looked at rings for a few years - just to be prepared and just fell into wedding planning and planned when to tell the families. No one discussion, no proposal, just an acceptance that we will get married. Told famillies 9 months later and a ring 5 months after that.

Not at all romantic but I know neither of us felt rushed and it just seemed right in a very relaxed way.