do you earn a similar wage to your siblings?

Money is not and never has been an issue in our family even though some of us earn considerably more than others. My Dad has always treated us all the same, and there is no jealousy.

In OH's family though there are many issues with this

Not really an issue in my family as we don't really discuss what we earn or compare it to each other. I find it really odd/rude that Mr K's family brag about how much they earn as compared to other friends/family and think that they have a right to know what I earn.

I know my little brother earns a lot more than me as his lifestyle reflects that, but I am not jealous, nor do I think he sees me as a lesser person for not earning as much as he does.

I earn nothing in my role as <ahem> Trophy Wife and my brother is a Partner in a flash law firm in the City of London earning stupid amounts of money so no, we definitely don't earn a similar wage!

My older brother and I are both bank managers, so earn a very similar amount. Little brother is the brains of the family and out-earns the 2 of us by a fairly sizeable amount. Actually, I suppose that I'm technically a SAHM for the next year, and next month my income drops to just SMP, which I'm not looking forward to.

Theres no way of comparing me and my brother. He's self employed and SIL a SAHM (she did have a business but sold it) and they have two children. I did work and earnt a fair wage (and hopefully will again), H works and earns more than I did. We tend to be sensible with money and save it so it isn't obvious to anyone how much we have. Brother goes from spending loads to being skint and I have no idea if/how much debt he has. He could say he's a millionaire or bankrupt without much surprise!

My sister and I don't discuss salaries but we both know I earn more than her as I have a very well paid job and have moved companies to get pay rises. She earns a good salary and has worked for the same bank since she was 16.

My SIL however comments occasionally in a nasty way about how much she thinks I earn (as I've never told her). Things like "well you have 2 jobs", me (surprised), "no I don't", her "well you earn enough to have 2 jobs" etc. She works for the Inland Revenue so is also limited as to how much she can earn on bandings.

My Mum is equally proud of both me and my sister but she does know how much I earn and is quite surprised.

My sister earns a fair few grand more than me nut she won't get paid that much more as she advances in her career (shes a teacher) whereas I (fingers crossed) will be earning more in the future. We don't discuss it, I do have to bite my tongue when I know my dads business is really struggling (building) and my sis is living rent free and contributing nothing to the household but ho hum

H's family are very concerned with money and he is not allowed to tell them what I earn because I don't think its any of their business, they discuss it at regular intervals with H and tell him what to spend his wages on. Apparently they have always done this it started at the pocket money stage and they've just carried on

My little brother is a tyre fitter and him and his fiancee just earn enough for them to live on but not have any holidays or treats. Me and H now we're both out of uni and in proper jobs have a pretty good wage between us and are quite comfortable at the minute (until we make our next big leap up the property ladder anyway). I always feel slightly guilty that I know they struggle, it means that we always spoil our nephew rotten. This christmas my nephew had seen a toy he really wanted and SIL told me that they can't afford it, so I asked if she minded if we bought it, she was delighted. We also buy presents for grandparents and put all of our names on, and we treated them to a weekend away at Drayton Manor Park last summer, we all went and it was great for me and H to spend loads of time with our nephew. I try to help them as much as possible, but I'm always really concious of upsetting them by stepping on their toes, so do it in a 'we really want to do it for nephew if you would let us' kind of way.

It isn't something we (me and H) talk about but my siblings do talk about - my brother to boast about how much he earns and my sister to complain she is always skint!! Prior to my being made redundant we actually earnt quite a bit more than both my siblings. My sister was aware of that but not because we told her, more because of the industries we all work in. I think my brother assumed he earnt more as I never commented when he would say what he earns but it isn't something I feel the need to talk about or am comfortable talking about.

My Dad has on a number of occasions lectured my sister about money but that is because not only does she have a tendancy to get in to debt, but also asks to borrow money from my Dad! I think as he is lending the money to her he feels he has the right to discuss how she manages (or mismanages!) her money? I don't think he has discussed money with me in donkeys years and my Mum wouldn't as she doesn't think it is her business unless I wanted to discuss it with her iyswim.

My two sisters have never worked since having children whereas I have so there has never been anything to compare in that respect. However there has been intense rivery in how much our respective husband have earnt which imo is a bit pointless really. My little sister is the worst for it - her husband is an accountant and she seems to think this entitles her to throw her lifestyle in our faces. What she doesn't realise is that my husbands earns far more than hers, but rather than be all high and mighty about it I tend to keep it to ourselves. Personally taking about money is all rather vulgar and none of their business anyway!

It's not something we particularly talk about or comes up really. I guess we probably earnt along the same lines when I was working full time, but I'm part time now and took a bit of a step down to work part time so there's a difference now. It isn't particularly relevant in my family. And my parents certainly don't treat us any differently and are equally as generous.

H & his sister earn quite different amounts (I think he earns roughly 3 times what she does). But I think that's a lot to do with differences in the way they've been treated and brought up. At times it has irritated me that she gets given far more than him from their parents, but she also has to put up the interference and trying to make decisions for her whereas H has made his own way. When they paid for her wedding that invited them to make a lot of decisions for her, which we didn't have to put up with! The other thing that winds me up slightly is that H's family seem to have an expectation that we have lots more money to spend (large mortgage + young family + debts means that is not the case!), and H always spends far more on Christmas & birthday gifts for his side of the family because of this.

I have several siblings, and there is a vast difference in household income between highest and lowest - I'm talking c100K joint for one couple, compared to an adult sibling who still lives at home with no income.

Money is definitely an issue to my father... but not as much as kudos in type of job. So a solicitor would 'win' over a sales manager - even if the former was a crap solicitor and the latter ran sales for Tesco! I don't think anyone really knows what the others earn - only an idea that 'x earns more than y'.

I expect my parents vastly over estimate MrMG's income, because he owns a business and chooses to have a flashy car. I have a job title they don't understand, and I'm in corporate world, which they don't understand - but choose to drive a pretty ancient car. So I did get quite sarcastic comments from my dad about 'knowing I'd make a good match' when I married - which p*ssed me off, like I'm some kind of gold digger... actually, MrMG and I have a very similar income.

My father definitely judges - and he can just sod off with it, as far as I'm concerned!

My brother earns lots more than me at the moment but that's because I'm a student/on maternity leave. He is younger than me and has just started his first job as some kind of engineer. I'm going to be a secondary school teacher so I expect that eventually his salary will end up more than mine.

Mr E earns much more than his older sister does and ever will. She and her husband are in a very difficult situation and neither of them will ever earn more than the minimum wage. I suspect that she thinks that Mr E earns a lot more than he actually does. He's in a fairly senior position but as he works in hospitality the wages are rubbish. I don't think that his parents would ever make a comparison as the two situations are so totally different and while I know they are proud of Mr E for achieving what he has at such a young age I think that they are equally as proud of his sister. I think they possibly worry more about his sister though.

The nice thing is that in both families money is just not an issue.

No idea what my sister earns, so no idea if I earn similar. I know she's always complaining about being broke - but I don't know if that's because of her earning a low wage, or because she spends most of what she earns !

My siblings that arent still at school earn more than me as I only get DLA, I dont know what their salaries are though. Its again not something we talk about. Same with H's family, H does earn more than his brother but his brother gets free accomodation for him and his family so it roughly equals out.

I work 3 days a week, but for comparison if I worked full time I'd probably earn about 10k less than my big brother. My little brother is doing very well in his new job which is mostly commission based and our salaries aren't even in the same range. He brings home more over 3 months than I do in 18 months.

Well my little brother's a student, my older sisters on maternity leave and I'm currently a sahm so we all earn the same: a big fat nothing. I bet our parents are so proud. ?

My middle brother's an insurance risk analyst, and earns a fortune.

My youngest brother is an academic and earns a pittance.

My sister is a primary school teacher - I imagine she's not rolling in it either, but she also loves her job (she switched from academia after realising that being a qualified primary school teacher would more or less guarantee that she'd never be unemployed).

Since I have no idea what they actually earn, I'm guessing I'm probably in the middle - I suspect I earn more than the academics/teachers even in basic salary, and most years I bring in up to a quarter as much again in freelance earnings (my academic brother writes books for prestige and promotion, not to hit the bestseller charts!). I know I'm nowhere near insurance risk analyst level (I wouldn't be surprised if he brought in low six figures, while I merely nudge the higher tax band in a good year), but I also really enjoy my job.

And I'm sure that if I did what my brother did, and trained as an accountant and then worked my way up through various big-name accountancy firms, I'd probably earn a fortune too - but I'd also want to slit my wrists well before hitting that level: to say it's not my sort of thing is a fairly colossal understatement. So I don't begrudge him his earnings at all.

I earn nothing now but when I was working I earned only a tiny bit more than my younger brother. I worked in financial services and he works in the car industry, but doing a very skilled and specialised job.

I would assume my sister earns around the same if based on full time hours, or maybe up to 5k more, my brother doesn't earn now (stay at home dad) but would say he was probably on what I am now before he left his job a year ago.

However, they both have very small mortgages as they bought in the mid nineties (my brother is 12 yrs older than me, my sister 15 yrs older than me) so probably have more real money in those terms, but they also both have 2 kids, so swings and roundabouts

I think my older sister earns about 20% more than me. I work in a fairly creative role for a small private company, while she is a civil servant. Its hard to explain, but in her working environment there seems (to me) to be more of a feeling that pay/benefits are an entitlement (in terms of a guaranteed salary review etc), whereas I find it difficult to get past the idea that I should be working for the love of it, and also that any money I am given has a direct effect on the business. Although thats as much about our different attitudes to money in general as it is about our jobs I guess. But its good sometimes to get her advice on how to approach asking for pay rises/promotions.

Strangely, whilst we are quite open with each other about our own salaries we are both uncomfortable talking about our husbands'.

I earn more than my three (older) siblings. But then I have mortgage and bills to pay on my own. My two sisters have better cars than I do, and can afford to go on holiday when I can't. I don't know how they do it to be honest, I don't think I have an extravagant lifestyle.

My parents know that I earn more than my siblings, but they treat us all the same (except that my other siblings have children - or grandchildren - so get more cash in their Christmas cards to share around!)

No idea, we've never discussed wages although as he works as an intelligence analyst for the police and I'm in admin I suspect he earns more than me. I wouldn't say it mattered though. My parents would never dream of commenting on how we spend our money either, it's not how we were brought up.

I earn more than my sister, we've never discussed it, but when she was thinking of applying for the job she told me it was x per hour.

I do remember a while back before having K (when I was working as an air hostess and getting quite well paid) that my BIL fiancee made a comment on how we (me and H) survived on 2 national minimum wage jobs, despite the fact that none of us earned national minimum wage. This was her assumption based on the jobs we were doing.

My parents don't care how much we earn so long as we're happy and live within our means.

Currently my brother is a student (and actually taking a year out at the moment due to depression anyway) so earns nothing, so I earn more at the moment. He's training to be a nurse so I suppose I'll always earn a bit more than him (although not necessarily much, I'm a teacher). I'm quite open about what I earn, I suppose because I feel teachers' pay scales are transparent anyway so my family could easily work out how much I earn and also just because we talk about most things, so why not money. However, we're very lucky that my parents really don't care what we do or how much we earn so long as we're happy - if they were critical or treated/judged us differently because of what we earn then I expect I'd keep quiet about it. I'm sure they're supporting my bro at the moment but that's up to them, I know they'd do the same for me if I needed it and he really does need it at the moment.

There's a bit of an age gap between H and his brothers so because we're still at the start of our careers, there's quite a big gap between what we earn. H's oldest brother and his wife do very well, and BIL is very open about their salaries, although in a bit of a boasting way which I find a bit vulgar (probably because I'm a bit jealous as well!). Because of their careers (she works in the civil service, he works in the city), they'll always earn more than H and I will as teachers. Whenever I feel a pang of 'I should be earning that much', I have to remind myself that I could be but I chose teaching because I love it and it makes me happy.

H's next oldest brother and his fiancee - I have no idea what they earn, they never talk about it and for them it's just a means to live - and to pay for their next big travelling adventure. His littlest brother is a student so again earns nothing at the moment but is planning on teaching so we'll be pretty equivalent.

H's parents don't talk about money / earnings either and again are happy as long as we are, they definitely don't judge us based on our salaries.

Maybe our parents treat us/our respective salaries the way they do because we are all university educated (that doesn't sound quite right, I mean qualified to a similar level, I think!), probably capable of doing each others' jobs but have all chosen the ones that suit us best and make us happy. Perhaps if any of us had failed to live up to our potential they would judge us more then? Just a thought about mine / H's particular situation.

I don't actually know how much my brother and sister earn, but knowing what their jobs are I must earn more than them. It's not something that's ever discussed in our family and not something I've ever thought about until this thread.

Considering my sister has been living in Australia for a year, I couldn't tell you. However pre semi-emigration she always earnt more than me but not much probably a couple of thousand here and there (if you pretend I still worked full time).

However we always had more money than she and her boyfriend did due to our joint income being higher than their joint income and she leads a different lifestyle. I've always been in a job I was in for the job, rather than the salary - whereas she was in it for the fact she was paid at the end of each month but wasn't happy so its all relative.

It's not really relevant at the moment because I'm not working just now and my brother hasn't been for a year. But, when I am working, I earn considerably more than my brother. My brother was not academic in any way and has found it difficult to get any jobs that pay much more than minimum wage in his area. It's funny this came up actually as I went to see my family yesterday and just generally talking, my mum kept dropping subtle digs into the conversation about how I'm obviously way above them now that H earns so much. It actually hurt my feelings as I was only telling them about a meal out we had had that THEY had asked about in the first place. My mum tends to spoil my brother rotten, especially now he's not working as I think she thinks that she needs to compensate for me and H earning so much more and having a better standard of living. I understand why she does it obviously, but it upsets me that she can be quite cutting about us having more money when we both worked bloody hard for it.

PIL are very interested in money and salaries, drives me mad.

I've not a clue what my sister earns, but I reckon I probably earn more, simply because she's only working part-time because her youngest is only just starting nursery and she's pretty much been a SAHM for the last 5 years.

It's never really been discussed, and I can't imagine why we would really

To the OP- I bet that felt good to correct your dad, I'd have enjoyed that too.

I definitely earn more than my 3 younger siblings but I'm probably the worst at managing money. My youngest brother doesn't earn much but he's married a lady who inherited a lot of money so they have a large house, no mortgage, nice cars and a fairly extravagant lifestyle with football season tickets and trips abroad every couple of months. H and I both earn good salaries but we also have a huge mortgage and £900 a month childcare costs so we're definitely poorer!

Gosh, I wouldn't have the first idea. She manages a restaurant in australia, has shares in the company, and is 8 years younger than me, so only just starting out in her career.

I'm established, working in consultancy but only worked 9-5. And now I only work 2 days, so I imagine she's got far more income than me. Although I make Mr Flaf pay my cake bills.

Well, My brother is a professional musician whose career is just starting to take off. He just about makes a living. His girlfriend is an actress who is either earning thousands, or nothing!

H's brother and his partner are part time teaching assistants. However, they also get various benefits and their only child is in full time school, so no childcare is needed.

Because of the difference in our set ups, both sets of siblings actually have more cash than us! They tend to have more luxuaries, like sky. We have a mortgage and other outgoings which neither of our siblings have to contend with. We also have childcare costs.

We don't really talk about it with H's brother as he is under the impression that we are very 'lucky to have all we have'. Nothing to do with the fact we both work hard. (He could have had a fantastic career, but got into the habit of smoking dope instead. He has no work ethic and his sickness record is apalling. He actually lost a job over his inability to attend....)

My brother will out earn us within the next few years and I couldn't be any prouder of him.