don't tell the groom!

Hello,

What a great gift/idea! A true romantic ❤️

Just yesterday I tweeted about an amazing offer that I saw on hitched through one of our venues, which was a wedding for 40 guests, for under £1000.

Here is the link if you are interested:

https://www.hitched.co.uk//wedding-venues/novotel-edinburgh-park_6022.htm#SpecialOffer

It may not be in your area, but it just shows that it sure can be done.

Really looking forward to seeing your plans unfold - and - we'd love to feature your wedding in our real wedding section once you've tied the knot :o)

Fran x

Thanks fran! I've been realky lucky and found the perfect venues for both ceremony and reception at great low prices meaning we can have the small wedding and big party I want. I found my perfect dress for £100 and all my friends and family are rallying round to help. I would be happy to be featured x

Wow this is a lovely idea!!

When have you planned it for? Is there anything you are stuck on or need ideas for?

September 22nd 2014, h2b's actual birthday with the reception the following Saturday. we're missing out the traditional wedding meal and just having a family buffet lunch at my parents house. I'm making my own invites and friends are doing the photos and food etc. What I really need help with is decorating the evening venue as I want it to look beautiful but don't want to waste pennies on it. I have quite a few crafty friends but am at a loss as to what to ask for!

I wrote this blog on 10 diy wedding ideas a while ago, but you mind find some inspiration from it...

https://www.hitched.co.uk/chat/blogs/planwithfran/page/20120712/10-diy-wedding-ideas.aspx

Fran

That sounds great. Fran's blog has some great ideas on there. I would also recommend looking on Pinterest for some inspiration as you can get crafty ideas on there!

There are some fab ideas on there! I can't decide whether to bother with save the date cards or not. Slightly worried that h2bs friends might give the game away lol

Erm, please tell me he knows that you're getting married?

Not to put a spanner in the works (and someone tell me if I'm wrong) but you'll have to tell him before the day - you both have to give notice at least 16 days before marriage.

He knows we're getting married at some point, he proposed to me lol, just doesn't know it will be next year. And yes, I have plans to tell him 3 months before so he has time to get over the shock and arrange his outfit etc... he already arranged his best man so I'm on fairly safe ground x

You're being extremely childish; it isn't a nice romantic suprise; you're tricking him into marrying you. If he had wanted to be married, he would have asked you, or at least agreed to it. Dreadful behaviour.

ETA - just saw your reply. So you're going to start your married life with quite a large deceit? Nice touch.

Ouch! Hang on a bit, have you never planned a surprise for someone you love? there's a huge difference between that and deceit. Every day he tells me how much he wants to marry me. We live together and in every other way but on paper we are married and have been for years now. Do you really think I'd do this if I wasnt totally sure he wanted it? His close family all know and support me and so do all his friends and I am 100% certain one of them would have warned me off if they thought I was wrong. Thanks for your thoughts but you have completely the wrong idea about me. It would have been nice to give me the benefit of the doubt before you jumped in

I think it's a nice touch it's not like you are not telling him you are just telling him in enough time to get prepared without being stressed. I hope it all goes well for you. Get the kids involved in decorating to make it personal, you will find some inspiration online and on hitched....good luck

Erm, sounds to me like he HAS proposed, so no tricking him into marriage here. She is also going to tell him 3 months before, so he has plenty of time to back out if he wants to (though i'm sure he wont!) What a strange reaction from you. ?

To the OP, I think it sounds lovely and romantic, have fun with all your planning!

I'm sorry? You've posted on a public forum; if you don't want opinions, don't ask.

Thank you x wasn't expecting such dramatic opinions!

Actually I didn't ask for opinions, just support but thanks anyway

Goodness me I thought that post was on the wrong thread for a minute! Then I realised it was actually been backed up. Very surprised at the comment and will continue to think that this idea sounds VERY romantic!!

Hopefully you will find Hitched mostly helpful!

Well I think what your doing is a lovely idea and think you should ignore any negative comments you receive. I hope it all goes to plan for you and you and your partner have a lovely day x

Hi, we are also on a tight budget, around £1 - £2k and I am completely convinced its do-able, especially as things feel like they are coming together now and I can see it working out. Money can be saved all over the place just by doing everything yourself. I will be growing my own flowers, wrapping glassware with lace for centrepieces and making my own invites. A family member will be doing the photos and I will do my own hair and make up. We managed to find a venue which is free as long as they do the catering, which is also cheap compared to most places, so its really coming together. However, although I don't necessarily agree with the comments made by Sange! it did get me thinking about your OH involvement. I have been consulting my OH every step of the way because at the end of the day its not just my day its his too and I've been surprised by how opinionated he has been. There were quite a lot of things that he wasn't keen on /happy about, so I had to change the plans a little or keep hunting till I found something that we both were happy with. So thats my concern really, that you might spend a lot of time and effort creating something which you think is perfect but which your OH just thinks 'meh, it'll do'. Of course, you know you're OH better than anyone, so you're the best judge of his response but I think if it was me I'd be tempted to get together some ideas, then before booking / spending / making run the ideas by him first

Thanks staranise. So far all I've done is booked the venues which we had discussed previously so I know he'll be happy with them. I'm a cardmaker all year round and he always loves what I make so they will befine too. As far as the colours scheme is concerned, it again is something we have discussed previously and he's always said its up to me. By the time I get to the nitty gritty of organising the reception, he will know and be involved and the same goes for music, readings etc... which I would feel uncomfortable doing without him! I'll basically be leaving all those details until I've told him but wanted to get the large expenses out of the way. The cost is what will stress him out so am trying to save him that x

I think it's a lovely idea and very romantic. What a great way to spend his birthday.

Love the ideas on here about getting the children involved in helping someway.

Im addicted completely to Pinterest and if your not already on there go hurry and join

It really does help give you some great ideas.

Thank you catnor. I am a pinterest member and my wedding board is coming along nicely! The kids are fully involved as two of them are quite grown up and the youngest are part of the bridal party. They are helping me no end!

The best bit about planning our low key, inexpensive and not-first wedding was sharing the planning process with my H.

I would have been beyond upset if I had had it sprung on me. Of course, you know your man, but the shared memories of the lead up to our joint big day are what make it special for us.

Just saying.

Are you sure he won't mind sharing his birthday? We deliberately arranged ours so it fell in between both our birthdays. I might have been a bit cheesed off if H had just landed it on me with me having no say in dates and locations. I know for sure he would have been miffed at not being part of any planning or choices too. But you know him best so good luck with it all!

I would agree if i was keeping him out of all the planning but I'm not. Everything I've done is something we decided together except the colour scheme. As that is based on my dress which of course he isn't allowed to see, that would happen anyway. He has often said that one or other of our birthdays would be a good day to get married so that ought not to phase him and he will be completely involved in all the important parts of our day which is the ceremony itself. I really have thought this through and have asked everyone who knows him for their opinions so i think that yes, I'm doing the right thing.

You'll know HB2 best and know if he'll love it or not.
Sounds like a great surprise, that's my brothers birthday too just wanted to add that in haha!
DIY wedding with that budget is perfectly doable especially since you don't have to fork out for big venues / togs etc so sure it'll all work out nicely.
Look forward to hearing more of your plans and you'll have to keep us updated with his reaction & some flashes etc
Ebay, etsy & pinterest are lifesavers for me with wedding things so get browsing for ideas and see the cheapest options to make stuff, loads of terrific ideas from them and i've found most help on here, loads of helpful tips & advice from diy brides (don't know how you all do it) so browse around x

Ah well good luck.

My friend did this to her partner and he refused to go through with it.

this. I find that quite a harsh reply, it might not be for you (and it wouldn't be for me) but they are engaged and he will have enough time to pull out if he wants (although it doesn't sound like he will).

OP, if its right for you and you're sure he will be fine with not helping plan etc then go for it. Just be sure he won't want to be involved in seeing the venue etc. is there anyway you could see it for another reason to gauge his reaction?

Sounds great and you know H2B best, mine stresses about money too. So we decided 30 mins once a week, we talk about the things isn't his final opinion on and anything else is done without him. It's better for him this way.

Your idea sounds Fab, can't wait to hear all your plans

I think it's a fab idea, good luck!

We're on a tight budget too and eBay and ikea have been godsends. Got my flowergirl dress and shoes from eBay and just got all outer table decorations from ikea. We went for these tea light holders, 2 per table on top of organza table runners from eBay. For 8 tables its cost us about £45.

Wow, I never thought of ikea! I'll have to take h2b over there after the big reveal and see what we can find. A lovely friend is making some vases for single roses for me but it mighht be a great idea for table cloths etc.,