Down and overwhelmed

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All that matter is that you and your h2b get married on the day.

Nothing else really matters.

People should be grateful that they got an invite - not spending the whole time criticising everything that they'd no doubt have been able to do in a much better way.

What a sad post. Is there anyone who can help you? Then you could write a to do list and allocate jobs to people and you can go dress shopping with someone else and you will find a lovely dress that you will try on and fall in love with!

Your wedding will be lovely because you are marrying the man of your dreams and nothing else matters!

Right i think you need to sit down and however daunting it may be you need to write a list of EVERYTHING that needs doing. Put it in order of priority and work down it slowly and calmly. Do you have a friend with a car that could take you to a dress shop? Enlist help where you can - if there is anything we or I can help with just holla.

Oh bless you! Your day will be beautiful and as fantastic as you have always dreamed. Can you not get someone to drive you at the weekend to look at this dress? If you're short for time and this is the dress you want you need to get a riggle on.

I have had lulls too but you have to remember that whatever happens you will get married and your day will be fab.

I you need anything done, il help!

my weddings not for agggggggges so cant really do anything for a while yet

Kristal,

don't be downhearted! it will be special because you and h2b will be there! if you need any help, were all here for you hun!

That's really sad - like the other girls said, all that matters is that you get married, the rest is just "stuff". If you are struggling financially you need to look at what you are spending where, and cut what you can. You will look lovely and have a wonderful day regardless. And like the others said, perhaps rope in a friend to give you a hand with the planning. There's lots of on line planning things that give you a list of what to do when, so take a look.

Hope you feel better about it all soon.

Indeed.

I have absolutely no idea who you are, or where you're from, but post a list of what needs doing and I'm sure we can all find or recommend some suitable suppliers from your area/venue area and go from there.

Do you mind sharing what sort of budget you're looking at, and the numbers invited?

One thing to remember is that pretty much everyone else here - myself included - has been, is, or will be in exactly the same position at sometime between today and our individual big days.

U poor thing. I remember feeling overwhelmed with it all too, but things wont organise themselves (sorry to be blunt) and the sooner you get on with things the easier it will be.

As long as your wedding is what YOU want who cares what everyone else thinks? Not everyone has an endless pit of money and most people will understand that.

You need to make a list of the big things that NEED to be booked asap. Tick them off one by one. Get someone else to research things for you if u need help.

As for this dress are you SURE its the one? Even so why dont you go to try some dresses on locally as you may find one thats closer and all the fuss is about nothing.

Just take it one thing at a time and everything will come together on the day I promise.

xxx

I have days like this too... then I rant on here at my internet weirdie friends (yes you!) and all becomes clear again!

I have a list... of everything in detail... sorted by Must do (with key dates) and Might do if I get time... then just tackle one thing at a time, if I try and do it all at once I get all confuddled and in a mess again.

Let us know what we can do to help, we are great are sourcing things!

And remember, your day will be the best day of your life... because you will be MRS KristaltippsHall!!!

Have a hug... and get started on your list!

Make a list of all the essentials for your wedding ie forms, registrar, your dress, his suit...then after all those are done, tackle the small mini (not so important) things. Huge table decorations, favours and things like that are lovely, but if money and time constraints make it difficult and too stressful then don't make it a priority at the moment. Everyone will understand, and they only want to be there with you to celebrate your big day!

I'm having 2 weddings, a church one and a hindu wedding. One is plodding along while the other hasn't even had a look in yet. So I feel the stress you're under too. Everyone seems to want us to do everything, while not remembering that we don't have all the time and money in the world to do it!

xx

Hey Kristaltipps.

C'mere.

Listen up.

How on EARTH could the day you are going to stand next to the person you love and commit to him in front of your nearest and dearest be a huge disappointment??? To anyone???!

Look, weddings have become an event that can so easily become about the DAY and not about the people and what they are doing - you and Mr K Tipps. It becomes about the cake, about the dress, about the colour of the napkins, about the fancy disco... and of course you want it all to be special but don't think you can't achieve that a) on a budget and b) in the time you have left.

Finding a dress you really want in a mag/online and it not being available locally is a pain - but compromise and go look in local shops that you can get to easily... you might just find your dream frock in your price range.

You have your venue - what can they do to help to take the pressure off? Can they provide good contacts for flowers, photos, cars - if you want these things?

You sound like you're having a tough tough time - like your self belief has taken a bit of a battering? But you're getting married to the man you love - thats got to be something to smile about? He wants, cares and loves you enough to want to become your husband ... not everyone has that...

If there are things you really want but aren't sure if you can afford it, ask on here - we can sometimes come up trumps!

Do you have your Order of Service and other on the day items? Name tags, menus etc? Table plan? Do you want these things?? If you want these and want to chat to me off forum about doing these on a bit of a budget, get in touch ok? I'd be happy to help out. ****@*********************.**.**

Keep the faith Missy ... your day will be fabulous just cos its YOUR day.

SP

Ah hun you sound very down in the dumps... second what others have said, make a list of things still to do and concentrate on one at a time. All the little bits don't matter so prioritise what's important to you.

Is there anything we can do to help you? Bit of sourcing and googling suppliers maybe?

Where do you live? can we help see if there's a dress that's similar more local to you? Think you'll be amazed at how happy people will be to help you out.

None of your friends and family will be disappointed - they'll be wowed by it being your and your OH's special day

x

Hey, thanks everyone, your responses just made me weep (but in a good way this time!).

I watched Dont Tell the Bride tonight and came away thinking how lovely, even though Dan got it almost all wrong, at the end of the day all that mattered was that Mark loved him and wanted to get married and be together, and thats whats important.

I said right at the beginning when we decided to get married that the one thing I didn't want was for it to stress us out to the point of not enjoying it, so I'm trying to chill the hell out and remember that!

I am currently sitting here listening to our wedding playlist and browsing around for ideas etc. You have made me realise that things aren't so bad. I have booked my dream venue: www.athenacb.co.uk, have sorted out all the legal stuff, and have started the confirmation of food. I know what kind of dress I want both for me and my bridesmaids, and the lady at my venue is great, the place is so grand anyway its not gonna take much doing to it but she's willing to help in any way she can. We've been putting music into the playlist everytime we think of a tune so thats building up nicely, and the invites have started going out so hey, things are good right?

Thankyou, all of you, I will definitely ask for advice in future from people on here who understand before getting all panicked and maudlin!

xxx

Just in case.... The dress I have set my heart on is one I saw a while back but had no idea where it was from, then stumbled across it accidentally.

Its Kelsey Rose 11597 in black and ivory, and I think I'd need a 14.

http://www.bridesofstirling.com/bridesmaids_and_prom.htm (image 4)

I just had a look at your venue.

Wow. I can see why you like it Like you said, it won't need much "doing up" by the looks of it.

Thanks AJ, I just absolutely fell in love with it, nowhere else was going to do!

Its an art deco cinema, we met in a drama group when we were both hell-bent on becoming actors, we both live and breathe movies and it just fits.

Just clocked your signature, Kristaltipps - read that if you need reminding what its all about!! Its very true....

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Awww - look, I am in same situation, on a debt management plan with not a penny left over after all bills are paid and reduced poayments made to creditors and most emergency expenses come out of our food budget, and I know it sounds corny, but I am living proof things have a habit of turning out right in the end... I have posted a few similar posts in the past and recently out of the blue we've had quite a bit of good fortune, people helping us etc. Have faith, find a friend to help you, don't feel you have to do it all on your own... I don't drive either so I spent hours on buses going to try dresses on (OK, I have a bus pass), but nothing is impossible... it just takes a bit longer, that's all! Like Vicks said, make a list of everything that needs doing, prioritise and assign responsibilities to people!

Big Viking Hug!

Makes sense with that dress too

Have a look at https://www.es-promotions.com/aspbite/categories/index.asp?intCatID=579 ...

I googled Kelsey Rose stockists, and these came up in Leicester - can none of them help? Its a STUNNING dress btw - I think I can imagine the sort of look you're after!!

LEICESTERSHIRE Ballgown Heaven
4 Orange Street
Uppingham
Oakham, Rutland
Leicestershire
LE15 9SQ
Tel.: ****
visit website Jolie Fille
11 Churchgate
Loughborough
Leicestershire
LE11 1UD
Tel.: **** Simply Brides
181 Blackbird Road
Leicester
Leicestershire
LE4 0AL
Tel.: ****
visit website Wedding Belles
8-10 High Street
Kibworth
Beauchamp
Leicestershire
LE8 0LR
Tel.: ****
********@*******************.**.**
visit website

Snow Patroller, the problem with the dress is that its this years collection, so everywhere's sold out, I've emailed just about every shop in the Midlands, none can help unless I want it in pink, in which case they've got loads!

Thanks so much for that link AJ, I love that idea, will have a really good look at that, we just started watching Steve Buscemi's new show tonight, all about the prohibition etc and both commented on how classy everyone looked and how great the clubs were etc.

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Hi, your post made me sad but everyone's replies are brilliant.

Keep your chin up.

I live in Rugby so not far from you. If you want anything at all, any help, please ask me.

I don't have much myself yet but I could possibly help with anything you need, small or large. If you happen to find one of Rugby or Coventry wedding shops stock your dress, shout, I'd be more than happy to pop in there for you.

Drop me a message and I'll give you my details if you want?

Your wedding will be the best day of your life because you are marrying the love of your life. Everything else is incidental and won't be remembered years down the line ?

xx

Afterthought - have you thought about seeing if someone could make you that dress??

x

Hi Kristal, I'm in the Leics area too so if I can help let me know. x

Thanks Kat, much appreciated. x

I have actually been racking my brains trying to figure out how to stylishly carry off a movie theme... the venue suggested these huge oscar statues but I think theyre a bit tacky.

Were naming each table after one of "our" movies - 'American Beauty', 'Serendipity', 'Return to Me' , 'Hi Fidelity', 'Say Anything' etc and the venue has said they have a billboard so it'llhave a huge "For one night only" film-style poster about our wedding.

Were also planning to have movie readings such as "When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots are become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the desire to mate every second of the day. It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body. No... don't blush. I am telling you some truths. For that is just being in love; which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over, when being in love has burned away. Doesn't sound very exciting, does it? But it is!" (from Captain Corelli's Mandarin)

I was thinking say 3 reel film tins on each table with favours (just sweets) in and I thought they'd be really easy to find but I can't find any anywhere, can anyone help with ths or any other any ideas?

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Some suggestions here: https://www.ehow.co.uk/how_2315859_buy-film-reels.html

Gaudy website but this companys "closing down clearance sale" - http://www.leescameras.demon.co.uk/ - lists "1200 feet & 1600 feet 16mm empty cine reels". Might be worth a call and explaining what you're doing, sounds like they might have something that suits your needs.

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Wow. Thats very very cool.

https://www.findtheneedle.co.uk/companies/findtheneedle-co-uk/products/1163178/film-cans - might be well expensive and don't know how many you need ...

Ohmygod you guys rock!

thankyou so so much. x

Firstly, I agree with what everyone has said - don't let the planning get on top of you. It should be fun and the important thing at the end of the day is that you and your OH are married. Despite the effort we put into it all, safe to say most people won't remember all the little details!

In terms of your theme, I was at a friend's 30th birthday party recently and she had a Hollywood theme which sounds similar. She had black and gold balloons on the tables and the weights were either little Oscar statues, film reels or clapperboards. If that sounds like the kind of thing you're looking for I can ask her for her suppliers details.

Oh, and use the internet as much as possible - I have done loads of my planning on the web whether it's been finding suppliers, comparing prices or getting ideas.

And keep smiling!

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Well this place is like having 500 personal wedding planners at your disposal... someone's bound to have - or be able to find - an answer for even the most obscure questions that you or anyone else is likely to come up with.

No, that's not actually a challenge...

Just wanted to let you all know I am feeling alot more positive today and thankyou once again.

If anyone has any more ideas for my movie theme please do chuck them my way! x