feeling down

Sounds to me like you need to take a break for a while. You have plenty of time to sort everything else out so ease up a little and enjoy being engaged for a bit xxx

Hi, sorry to hear your feeling down with things, I think it can be a bit overwhelming and you think there's tons to do, but at the moment you still a very long time to it all, and you've already got three big things booked which is fantastic! We found booking the band one of the more 'argh' things we've done so far too, I think you end up listening to so many they all merge into one anyway. Is it picking a band style your finding tricky, or is it just the overwhelming choice? In the end we just listened to a few on a website that I found, I think it helped that I found a website that had a few on, but not too many, picked one I liked the look of and really liked the guys voice. It was a case of listening to a few more and comparing them to this first one, and after about 5 we got a bit fed up and just went for them...did have a mini wobble, n thought sod it, we liked them every time we listened so why worry now. Have a boogie around your living room n see who makes you shake your thang most! Is you have listened to lots, can you narrow it down by style? And if you have listened to lots I'd leave it a couple weeks and come back to it else you'll go insane from listening to 'Mr brightside' over and over and over :-D

Have a break, try not to worry too much, be happy with what you've done so far, it'll all get sorted in the end x

Agree you need to take a little break from planning for a while.
No point in going over everything if you're not enjoying it and sometimes a break makes you miss it and you find things to be excited about again.
Everyone worries about things but you have to just remember it'll all be ok. Feel free to share your worries and concerns we might be able to put your mind at ease.

If you take a break when you get back into it find the things that excite you about it and look around on pinterest and things like that for ideas, I like a wee browse with a cup of tea in hand. Or look at your venue - think about decoration ideas etc...whatever takes your mind off the nerves

Heya,

Im sorry to hear you're feeling down.

I think it comes and goes in waves but at the end of the day it'll be a lovely day.

Why not have a little break from the planning?

Ive been feeling exactly the same today... mines about trying to find a photographer and my dress, whether ive made a mistake.... maybe il feel better tomorrow!!

Xx

Totally agree with the other guys on your post. It is overwhelming at times. You have plenty of time so you can relax and enjoy being engaged! Maybe plan a night away with your OH or cook a nice meal. Diverting your attention even in short term may help recharge the batteries for more focused band researching.

Hi,

I also think its normal. I have really big highs and then lows. But I think it was because I was being too impatient, id start planning and then feel like it was too far away so I got annoyed. I stressed about money, and all the what ifs in the world and then...I just stopped!

I have combatted my negative feelings and emotions by changing my perception of the situation, and when you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.

As with most things in life what you resist, persists and so I am no longer resisting against 'how its so long away', instead I now accept its not till next August and so I am calmer and not fighting against the whole 'I want it all now'. I am no longer resisting against 'will we save all the money in time and what if it cant be saved', instead I accept that it takes time to save, and so although I don't have all the money now, this time over the next 16 months will allow me to save. Also I am having no luck with dress shopping and I was getting fed up with it all, but now I accept it may take months which is ok as I plan to have my dress ordered by 8 months before, and in fact tomorrow I am visiting my 4th bridal shop alone, to take off the pressure and allow myself to feel if being alone will make the process easier.

So to sum it up, if you feel down, don't chastise yourself, which is to resist against it, instead allow yourself to feel the emotions that comes with it, accept you feel down, and take a break from planning. Then things will become clearer and easier to handle.

Know that it will all work out in the end, so you may as well make the next 16.5 months an easier journey than a harder one. You will end up being married and having your dream day, so chose to make the next year and half planning it an exciting one. There is no wrong or right choices to make, only choices and whatever you chose will take you on the path you need to be on, the path that is right for you, but you can change your feelings and thoughts to positive ones and take the pressure off yourself in the meantime.

Hope this helps and congrats on your engagement. xx

It IS super overwhelming. I suffer from BDD, anxiety and OCD and the thought of planning, and then going through, a traditional weddding fills me with panic. That's why I'm eloping with minimal fuss. The other posters have given very good advice - take a break, remember why you're doing it in the first place, don't feel pressured into having or doing anything you don't love.

Some great advice here. I too suffer with anxiety and find it very overwhelming sometimes, so it's quite re-assuring to hear the same from others. I keep saying I'm going to get 'keep it simple' tattooed on my forehead! ?

My mind often wonders to eloping when I feel like this! We are having a fairly small day tho, with 40 day guests and another 20 to the evening so it will be close family and friends anyway.

Wedding planning can be overwhelming but try not to panic, it sounds like you're well on track!

There are a lot of bands out there, so it can be hard to know where to start. It helps to really narrow things down. Ask yourself...

* What style(s) of music you want. Contemporary tunes, indie, classic rock 'n' pop, soul, jazz... a mixture? Shortlist bands with a repertoire to match.

* What kind of budget do you have? Many bands will give a rough idea of their fees. Don't waste time looking at bands in the wrong price bracket.

* How much space is there for the band, at your venue? If the performance area is large, you'll have more options. If it's small, that 3-piece band might be ideal - and that 7-piece soul band just wouldn't fit..!

* Will the band be able to play the song you want for your first dance?

Rest assured, booking now for 2015 puts you in a good position. The best bands will already be prettty booked-up for 2014, but not many people are booking yet for next year so you'll have plenty of great bands available to choose from.

Hope that helps - and check out our blog for more top tips on booking a band.