Feeling funny about changing my name

Would it work as a double-barrelled name? And you could keep your maiden name for work?

I feel quite similarly, never thought I would be bothered about it until I became a teacher- now I'm VERY used to being called MissG all day and it will feel weird having to change that, I am looking forward to becoming an official team with H2B though, but will be a big change!

So glad it's not me!

OH asked if I was feeling strange about it, and it sudenly dawned on me that I do feel a little strange, like part of my identity has gone.

However, I am so looking forward to having the same name as our little girl and us being a family with the same name!

Maybe keeping your maiden name for work, will help with the "transition"?

Really wouldn't work as a double barrelled name! We've tried it out and it sounds like an insult! When we asked other people they just laughed at said we really couldn't do that! I was going to try to keep my name for work, but my new surname will also begin with a J, so the staff think it's hilarious that I'm going to be JJ and the students are all excited about calling me a Mrs!

I felt a little bit like that as people used to call me by my last name, especially one work friend.

He sent me a text the day after the wedding using my new name, and instantly it just felt right.

I text Dad before the wedding saying "In 4 weeks I won't be a B**** anymore" and he replied "No, but you'll always be my daughter". So I felt a lot better about it.

Now, it's getting normal - I'm still giving my Maiden name when asked for it quickly and so have to correct myself ?. But, overall, I am glad I changed my name.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who has felt funny about it!

Hopefully after the wedding I'll be like you LM and it will just feel right. Fingers crossed!

It does feel odd because it's been part of your identity for all these years.

But I'm sure it'll all feel right when the time comes.

If you don't want to change yours, but you both want the same name, why can't he change his? Or you could both merge rather than double-barrel (e.g. Taylor + Wilson = Tayson etc). Or you could both pick a completely new name.

You're not the only one-don't worry!I'm a teacher too and it feels very strange as I find myself still answering to my old name -then correcting kids and laughing as I forgot too.But what overcomes everything I found, is the fact that you share a name with your husband-you're family.

Got my first letter through the post in my new name and it made me smile.You'll always be unique you-don't worry :-)

I love having my married name - though I do the same as LM and refer to myself as the wrong name sometimes! The only time it was weird was when I was looking at a photo of me and my brothers taken on the day which was on face book. It was tagged so read Dave XXXX, Raincloud YYYY and Tom XXXX. That was strange, not having the same name as my brothers anymore - and I never will again!

I did make that point to him Mrs J but he wouldn't even entertain it. We could potentially make a decent name with the first half of mine and the second half of his but he won't have it.

Thanks Thor - that's a really nice sentiment and makes me feel a bit better about it.

I feel exactly the same. I used to hate my surname when I was younger and used to say I couldn't wait to get married to get rid of it. But now it's happening, I realise how much I'll miss it. My name is very unusual and unique (as in a facebook search will only find people actually in my family) I couldn't double-barrell as they just don't go together, and I'd want any future children to share my name. But glad there seems to be more than just me that's a bit upset about changing my name!

I know exactly how you are feeling. I have a really good last name and I love it but once I marry the family name will die.

I can't double barrell it because it sounds rediculous but I have been feeling strange about changing to one of the most common names in the world (Jones! )

I spoke to H2B about it and he was upset when he thought I wanted to double barrel it.

I'm sure you get used to it with time - and like someone else has said further up - I wouldn't like to not have the same surname as my future children - the surname bonds you all together which is lovely ?

xxx

I don't want to change my name, it's not a great surname but it's mine and I'm very attatched to it, I've had many times being taken the mick out of it as everyone knows they mean me when it's mentioned lol

My h2b wants me to have his name but as his third wife, I will just be another Mrs R.. instead I will be Mrs A R not to be mistaken with argggghhhhh lol even if the battle to get that name feels like it at times ?

For a short time I'll be having a different name to my son (he's my birth son, my OH is currently adopting and will be changing it to my OH's surname once the step-parent adoption has gone through) but will be changing it when we are married.

Freckles knows my surname and I think my OH's is better...but I agree chick your's and N's names wouldn't blend well ?

M's name is probably more 'common' (that word always sounds bad, and I don't mean it in that way at all!) if that's what you mean by 'better'

And I agree 100%, our names are two which will never blend together welll!

I know exactly what you're going through. I'm really attached to my maiden name and after only getting married earlier this month I am still finding it hard to announce myself with a different name. I also get called by my surname a lot or a nickname similar to it so it's really horrible not having it. i just know that in like 5 years time i'll be over it and I will have got used to it, there's more to identity than just the name but at the moment its pretty rubbish!

I love my maiden name, and i'm a bit sad about not having it any more, but i am excited to share the same surname as my OH. My surname and my OH's surname actually make a really posh sounding double barrelled name, but OH doesn't want to. I have now decided that i'm going to make my maiden name my middle name so that i still have it to keep with me. It needs to be done through deed poll, but it's what i want to do.

Having quite an unusual surname I dreaded the thought of loosing it, I almost felt like I was loosing my identity and a few months before the wedding I got really emotional about it, I couldnt quite see how my oh's name was going to work and I had so many nicknames because of my original surname I was rarely called by my first name, to top matters off my grandad passed away 6 weeks before the wedding and at that point I was adament I wanted to keep my name the problem was that it would have sounded ridiculous double baralled and I really wanted to have OH's surname to..... in the end, I chose to take on my husbands name and his name alone, and I cant tell you how much I love it! It feels so right, but what is lovely is that I still get called by my old nicknames which is lovely. If you are anything like me you'll love it! I know it doesnt feel like that now but it will once your married.

I only reclaimed my maiden name a couple of years ago following my divorce! I am very reluctant to let it go, I've only just persuaded certain organisations to revert me back.

I will not be changing my name at work - I will keep my maiden name as it is just too much hassle to explain 3 names in 3 years. My OH said he would be very disappointed if I didn't become Mrs D, so I will officialy be Mrs D on my passport, just Miss C at work.

I know how you feel! Everytime I write my full name or say it to anyone, my stomach goes a bit funny cos I remember I'll have a different name soon. I much prefer my name now than my future married name but I think after I while I'll get used to it! I might change non-legal things slowly though to break myself in. Ie. facebook etc!! Hahaha!

I wouldn't keep my name as it is now as I would want to have the same name as our future children, but what really bothers me is that I'll have my new name for decades to come whereas my name will have only been with me for 20-odd years! If that makes sense! ☹️

I so nearly started a post like this! I have been feeling a bit weird about changing my name. Although I have two brothers and four nephews who will carry my family name on so think I'm only feeling weird for no other reason than having it for so long, it's part of me, my identity etc. I too hated my surname at school and used to get upset by the various rude versions the other kids would think up, but in latter years (and more so months when I have been thinking about my new signature) have become quite attached and protective over it! That said, I am quite excited about becoming a "Mrs. G" too but am worried my new name might get called out, in the doctors or something, and I'll not realise it's me! x

I wasn't going to change mine. Not because i'm precious about my name, but because my son has my surname, and I didn't want him being the only "W", and everyone else being a "P". But then OH and I had a child together, and he has also got my surname, so now my edest son won't be the only "W".

But to throw a spanner in the works, we've decided to try for another baby in the new year. We'll be married by that point, so I'm thinking of changing my name after we've had that baby, so all my kids have the same surname.

Thank you for all your responses. I think it helps to know that I'm not the only one and that it's pretty normal to feel how I feel. Hopefully I'll feel like some of you OMs have said and it will feel right when it does happen. Hopefully friends will still use my nicknames that are takes on my current surname, I guess that would be a nice way of keeping it alive! I think I just need to get used to the idea a bit more!

Me and my OH have had this converstion loads. I said I quite liked my own maiden name and loads of people keep it. He is so layed back and I normally get my own way with things BUT he has seriously put his foot down over it!! He says its the only thing he really wants is me to take his name. I dont have a problem changing my name just quite like my own ha. Anyway, its one thing I dont seem to have a say in xx

You're definitely not alone. There's no doubt that I'll be taking OH's name. It's not a particularly great name and it sounds a bit rude but it's his name!! I've often joked that I won't take his name and he used to say the same as your's-that we wouldn't get married then. Now he just says that it's fine if I don't want to ... but I won't have the same name as our son! I definately want us all to have a family name. And it totally won't work double-barrelled.

I'm not at all close to my dad and his side of the family so I don't feel sad that I'm the last in the line of "xxxxs" but I'm still Miss XX and that's how I feel. I'm worried that it will feel really weird, a bit like I'm a different person when I change my name. A new girl at work has just started with the same surname as my maiden name and when I heard it said out loud with a different first name I realised that my surname really isn't that great after all!

I'm going to miss being Miss M, but then I'll be Mrs M instead. MIL2B said about people always getting the spelling of it wrong... I've had that problem for years with my original surname, so it won't be any different.

The only bug bear I have is having to pay to change my passport again after only 2 years, but I have to have it at work!

I know that feeling - mine is due to be changed next year and then we get married nearly exactly a year later!

I never even thought about keeping my sirname until quite recently, when I realised that when I take my OH's sirname that my new full name will sound like someone famous with quite an unusual name.

When I have said my new name to people they laugh, as no one put two and two together before until now.

I am quite happy to take the name still as it's a special part of getting married to me. Although it does mean a lot of hassle with changing details on paperwork etc.

I also used to not really be bothered about my current sirname, but now I really love it and am known for it by everyone i know. Even my OH calls me by my sirname.

My sister who got married recently took her OH sirname, and he still calls her by her previous name too!

I cant go double barrelled, as our names are both quite unusual and it just wouldnt work. Otherwise I would definitly do that.

I am called by my surname by loads of people- especially Flow!

At work all the "lads" call me by my surname, they have said that even though I will have a new name they are going to call me by it. Its cool, I get rid of the name of a famous rock star by getting married as well- been 28 years too long for that one!

Kept mine. So very, very glad I did. I know I would have hated to be Mrs B. It's an unpleasant historical throwback to me. It doesn't suit me, wouldn't feel like me and I don't particularly want to be allied to his family in that way. Never wanted to have the same name as his mum, ex-wife or children, so it was a no-brainer for me to stay as I was.

He took some convincing though, and his family absolutely don't get it (" What's the point of getting married then?")