For those of you with children...

Our four children are coming on our honeymoon. I can see where you are coming from, we started young too, but for me, this just means we will still be able to travel and see the world when our children are grown up.

If you are secure in your own decision though, then it really doesn't matter what anyone else's opinion is, does it?

Mrs m2be I don't think this is selfish at all

This is your wedding &honeymoon as saying goes you only do it once!

Your smallchildren aren't going to be keen on travelling for hours on a plane & being carted around America I think u paying for them to have their own adventure with their auntie is a great idea and at the end of the day I think u and ur new husband should make the most of getting to spend some quality child free time together and not feel guilty, you have years in which to take ur wee ones on holiday and spend time with them, your never going to get that newly wed buzz back in ten yrs time to have a "honeymoon" then so make the most of it

Xx

I am new to the hitched discussion forums and don't really post, but I saw this and had to comment as I'm in exactly the same predicament as you. Our daughter will be nearly 3 when we are married, and although at first we planned to honeymoon with her, after much persuasion from my mum, we are now planning on leaving her behind for 2 weeks. My reasoning is that 1. She will be too young to remember/enjoy the holiday 2. We are planning on going on a worldly honeymoon which would be hard with a small child and 3. It is our HONEYMOON! We plan on doing all the things honeymooners do and this would simply not be possible with our little girl with us. Both my mum and MiL are extremely happy at the thought of having our daughter between them for 2 weeks, but I have had some people judging me saying "oh I could never do that" etc. at the end of the day it is your decision and your honeymoon. You are not a bad parent or selfish if you decide to leave them at home. I know we will miss our daughter greatly, and she will miss us. But I know I am making the right decision.

Thank you for your reply! This is pretty much exactly what my fiancé said...we're never going to get this time back and 2 weeks in the grand scheme of things is a drop in the ocean! The kids will have a blast being spoilt rotten for the time we're away and so they don't feel like they've "missed out" as such (my daughter is desperate to go on a plane!!) we will have a family holiday in the summer!

It's good to hear from a like minded person!!

That's great your mum & mil are so happy to have your daughter whilst you honeymoon! Where do you think you'll go? My fiancé want a "proper" honeymoon which you're right, wouldn't be possible to do with a small person in tow! I'll miss them like I'd miss my right arm but can Skype/face time and no doubt they'd be having too much fun to miss us too much!!

When is your wedding? We get married 11thApril next year so only 9 months, but so far I'm spending more time planning our honeymoon than the wedding at the moment!

We are hoping either Hawaii or the Bahamas. Either journey would be near to impossible with a 3 year old in tow! Our wedding date is 24th May 2014! Planning is going well, got lots booked and most things sourced now. I consider myself very lucky that I have family members literally queuing up to have our daughter stay with them. And like you say, Skype and FaceTime are wonderful tools for such situations!

I do worry that I will miss her like crazy. She has been on a mini holiday with my mil for 4 days this weekend and i have missed her terribly. However, she has had a blast and she's a very independent kid so I'm not too worried.

my advice is don't let other make you feel like you are selfish and ignore those who will try and guilt trip you. If you are lucky you won't have anyone that'll do this openly, but there will be those who will make judgements. At the end of the day, it's your honeymoon. I know I only intend on doing this once so I want it to be a once in a lifetime experience!

:-)

Oooh, not long after me then!! How is the planning going? I've only got my church, reception & tog booked! I need to give myself a kick up the behind soon!

Your honeymoon sounds amazing!! And def more of an adult only type holiday! My daughter has stopped with my mum a fair few times for 2/3 nights at a time...she doesn't miss me at all! I do miss her though. My son hasn't stopped away from us for more than one night so I'm a bit more concerned about him, but he'll be 4 by the time we go away so hopefully him being older should be easier!!

xx

This is the same dilemma I have been having, with myself mainly! I thought I definitely did not want to leave my boys, they will be 2 1/2 and nearly 5 when we get married and that was that. Then I started to think, well we plan to have more kids after we have married and well if we don't do it now, when would we! probably about 20 years in the future!! Then the next dilemma was where to go, I said to my fiancé that it had to be no more than 2hrs flight away, just in case something happened we could get home... now I'm thinking that's pretty pessimistic isn't it and what are the chances really...and maybe we should just make the most of having some time for us. We've been together 6 years and of those 4 have been with kids so it would be really nice to have time for just us. Anyway that brings us to the current plan of a week in America, New York mainly. I must admit it sounds like heaven...and like it's been mentioned there is skyp and they will be well looked after.