Future Mother in Law Trying to Invite New Partner

I don't think you're being unreasonable, particularly if she has a history of having short-term relationships. Maybe you could compromise and invite him to the evening only? At least then he wouldn't try and be in the photos.

I would sit her down, both of you, and explain that you aren't having any plus 1's that you don't both know, and explain that you also don't want strangers in your photos.

I would let your partner do the talking as it's his mum, but be there in support.

You could always say that you've confirmed the table plan and food options too, and there is no more room...

Good luck! x

You'll only give her even more to moan about if he doesn't get to come! Does it really matter whether he comes or not? It's only one day and means that she will have a better time.

Don't let her!. You will be stuck with a stranger in your wedding photos.

I don't think you're being unreasonable at all. Just say you're at an absolute limit on guests and budget, and stand your ground.

If her new partner is more important than attending her son's wedding, then that says it all at the end of the day. If she does say no because he can't come, she'll probably cave in the end, anyway.

Or another tactic could be (if you are willing to have him there if it doesn't work) to tot up exactly what it will cost to allow him to attend, then tell her you'd be happy to have him come, but as it has taken you out of budget, she'll need to contribute the cash for his place ?

If she says she won't come without him say "What a shame. We'll miss you" then change the subject. Don't let her keep raising it and making it an issue. If you make it of minimal importance she will most likely turn up!

This is quite a difficult one, what if he becomes a big part of your life in the future would you then regret not having him? Does your father in law have a partner?

Before you say a definitive "no" I would definitely recommend that you meet him, at least. I know your hubby-to-be met him, but maybe try to have dinner just the four of you to get to know him? If your instinct still says that you don't want him there, then so be it. In my opinion though, a few guests should be exempt from the "no +1" rule, like parents...!

If you're really worried about photos, then you can always have a word with the photographer to explain the situation; they'll make sure you get family-only photos in a discreet way - I'm sure they get this type of request all the time!!