Gah!!! Can't stop crying...

<chucks janjabean a thorntons toffee> you can't cry and chew at the same time.

? that really is shocking, i'm so sorry that they've been so mean to you and it sounds very unfair to me ?

draw a line under it? how fcuking dare they!

Firstly have a hug or ten ? Thats a really crappy thing for them to do. This may cheer you up, well it usually cheers me up http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=wCASLzsOG70

I can offer a hug? ?

Sounds very mean to me. I'm sure you don't get the best out of people by telling them to draw a line under something like that. Does your appraisal affect your pay? Is there someone (nice) you can talk to?

Aw, thanks guys….yeh, it was pretty mean when it happened the first time. I actually had ANOTHER week off after that meeting because I was so gobsmacked by the lack of support it set me back hugely.

The shame of course is that last week I overheard one of my colleagues saying he’d got 3’s (anyone who knows appraisals know the ole points system) and I know for a fact he does b*gger all in a day! I got one less than that because I’d had a ‘tough year’ even though I’ve done a better job than this guy! I may be cynical, but no one looks beyond the last ‘marks’ you got….just that you got a certain mark. And shouldn’t the fact that I’ve done a bl00dy good job since Dad died IN SPITE of it, bump me up slightly?? Gah….maybe not, but I feel really hard done by.

I’ve made an appointment with HR..not least because we’ve JUST been taken over by another company and I don’t want my first appraisal with them to tarnish my reputation to be honest.

I’m very cross.

Bowski…love that clip. ‘His stomach just stopped!!’.

Chicken…I do have nice people to talk to, yes. Family wise of course. Apart from that I’m hoping the HR lady is nice.

Legless – thank you for the toffee!! Nom nom….

I want to get purples just to find out what it is!

That's terrible. Is there anyone else you can discuss it with? I'd probably want to take it further, if it was me.

This might make you smile ?

Oh my god!!!! Bless...don't you just love the nonchalant looks they have on their faces sometimes!

Cat youtube is always a winner as far as I'm concerned....

If you're a cat fan, you need a daily dose of https://icanhas.cheezburger.com/

The strange internet geek speak can be annoying and take some getting used to, but my days wouldn't be the same without it. And the related sites - failblog, lolpolitics, lolcelebs, etc. Enjoy!

Thanks! I am actually a massive cat fan...I have 2 little kitties of my own. And I've been a regular on icanhascheezburger but you've just reminded me that I haven't been on for a good 3 or 4 weeks so I need to look at new stuff.

Thanks again guys. Sometimes just taking one's mind off it makes all the difference.l ?

What utter wankchops you must work with ? 'Draw a line under it'. I'm shaking my head.

I think that it is a good idea to go to HR. As it may be a stressfull meeting make sure that you take a list in of points that you absolutely must cover.

Aw, you poor thing, that is awful.

My sister had a similarly supportive dept during her appraisal when our Dad died 3 years ago. Her manager told her that such-and-such in their dept had been through similar (this other girl's best friend's Mum died after a long illness; our Dad died suddenly on holiday & was young, had to sort out his funeral, tell our Mum, his boss, friends, clear his house out, etc) and had dealt with it a lot better. Fortunately my work were much more supportive.

Losing a parent isn't something you can really get your head round unless you've been through it. Most compassionate people have a bit more sympathy than your boss though.

Take care, and you know where we are if you need to talk.