Getting married in seccret

Half of me says that sounds very romantic ans stress free. But the other half says is it like lying? You will be married, but not able to wear your wedding rings around anyone else, and when you 'marry' for family to see, you will have already married in actual fact.

Is there no way to do a registry office wedding soon and just invite close family to go for a pub meal with you afterwards? (they can pay their own), that way they wont ever have the upset of knowing it was fake and you get to be married before the baby comes.

Another ? ?

This

But in case it's genuine......how old are you and your boyfriend? Do your parents know you're pregnant? If you've decided already, does it really matter what our views are?

All of the above. If you have any sort of relationship with any of them, both of your parents and wider families will be hurt if you keep this from them. I would have thought they would be happy to help you formalise your new little family, if not able to support it financially, I would expect they'd want to at least share a low-key occasion with you. If you really don't want to involve them, but have any respect for them, at least let them know. I would be so sad if my daughter felt the need to keep her marriage from me, because it wasn't a 'proper', big one.

Surely you wouldn't be able to actually have a religious ceremony if you're already married? It would be a renewal of vows, technically, I'd imagine. I'd say if it's what you really want, get married as you planned with the registry office, but tell people about it, perhaps go for a meal with close friends and family as someone else suggested...

My friend got married with just 2 witnesses because they wanted to get married before having a family, but I'd always say you're better off being honest with people if that's what you want to do. There'll be people who don't agree with what you've chosen to do, but at least they'll know you've done it and won't be hurt about being lied to