gift list or money?

We'll be asking for money.

As H2B and I will have been living together for over 2 years by the time we get married we'll have everything we need, we pretty much do now so we're going to ask for money so we can put our own stamp on this house and decorate as we're just not going to have the money to do so while we're saving for the wedding.

We're both sick of looking at blummin magnolia walls in every single room and neither of us like paint and want to wallpaper!

We didnt mention anything on our invites, but if people asked we kindly asked for money so we could buy big stuff for the house and people have been more than generous

We just got our invites printed and decided not to mention it. We thought that if people were kind enough to want to give us a gift then they could decide best what the gift should be.

We decided not to say anything about gifts in the invites, if anyone asks directly then we would probably say money.

We asked for money or Argos vouchers, on the basis that one person probably wouldn't give us £200 but 8 people would give us £25 each towards a big purchase.

There's a lot of divided opinion round here on asking for cash rather than a 'traditional' gift list, or even whether you should ask evening only guests. But I don't see it as a problem, just because you say if you want to get us a gift this is what we want still gives guests no obligation to get you anything - even though most would expect to, even evening only guests.

We were overwhelmed by the generosity of our guests on the day, and only three people bought us actual "gifts" rather than what we asked for.

Ultimately, regardless of etiquette or tradition, you know your guests best and if you think some (usually elderly relatives) might get offended by the thought of asking for cash, then maybe you could just leave it off their invite and wait for them to ask. However, I'd have thought having to ask them how much they want to spend so you can give them some suggestions is more awkward than them just putting a cheque in an envelope.

If you are asking for cash, remember to mention that you haven't yet got a joint account. We had £500 of cheques made out to "Mr and Mrs" which we had to sit on for a few weeks until we managed to get a joint account opened. Ok we weren't in a desperate need for the cash, as it was going in a savings fund to wait until we move hopefully in the new year, but it was still annoying having to keep that sort of money secure. As we both work full time, getting to the bank together was nigh on impossible so we ended up spending half a day of honeymoon (we went to Wales) sorting it out, and remembered to take ID such as passports and wedding certificate with us.

Just one tip - if you're using one of those cheesy "money poems" in your invites, don't mention it on here. Most people hate them!

We didn't mention anything anywhere. We got almost all cash gifts.

WSS and that is all I am saying on the subject.?

No one is replying to me other thread but this is related!

If you are using gift lists, are you mentioning it in your invite or simply enclosing a card with the invite? I felt it was a little rude if we weren't explaining as it's as though you're expecting people to contribute then

x

I'd personally not like to include it in the invite, but relise I will have to, as already so many family members have asked what we would like. As OH and I dont live together (old school) we do need a 'traditional' gift list, so if someone wants to buy us a kettle or a pack of tea towels, great we will certainly get plenty of use out of it. And if they want to give money that is fine as we will put it towards our home, and if they dont want to give anything at all that is very understandable, its very expensive for guests to attend weddings in the first place without buying a gift to!

Thanks for info on Debehams, didnt know they charged for delivery will be keeping away from there ?