Guest list

Ooh tough one I can totally see your point about not knowing them! Depending on how many you're having to the day can you just say you really can't afford to pay for them & you've already had to cut more important people to evening only due to restricted numbers etc etc? You never know she may offer to pay for them?!

My sister has said this to my Mum regarding her wedding which is before mine, and my Mum has indead offered to pay for them. I think maybe this will be my half way house approach but it does feel strange. The interesting thing is that one of my Step sisters is getting married this June. I have not received an invite and my Mum has not mentioned that this is at all unusual. I think the invite would be more for my Mum and step Dad than for either set of siblings so i think my Mum would be throwing her money away.

I was thinking this too. It's so difficult when people make you feel guilty and you want to try to keep them happy, but then again you don't want to spend your wedding day with people you don't even know.

I think the evening reception suggestion is a good one.... I see the ceremony itself as something really intimate, for those really close to you to share your special day (that if I had a choice, I wouldn't share with anyone bar a handful of people), so the evening reception is a nice halfway house.... Would that be possible?

My mum was very vocal in who she thinks should be receiving an invite to our wedding aswell. She could not understand why i would not want her friends daughters at my wedding, i explained that i had not seen any of them for oer 10 years and therefore could see no reason for them to come (I should just add that my mum's friend's were basically my family when i was growing up as we spent every day together , holidayed toagter etc) My mum huffed and puffed said i was wrong and that in order to stay friends with people i had to invite them to things, I pointed out that i didnt want to be friends with them or i would have stayed in contact. The long and short of it was a number of rather heated phone calls, but i stood my ground and they are not coming and i am really happy that i did not cave into my mum. It s our day and i do not want people there who are not our friends. My mum's comprimise is that my parents are going to pay for a post wedding party where they get to invite everyone that they feel we should have invited!! I think they are being stupid but theya re paying for it all and if it makes them happy then so be it. My wedding day is just that MY wedding day and i am not being bullied into inviting people.

Thanks for your advice. The reception idea is a good one but probably not practical as they will be traveling a distance. Im going to see how my sisters wedding pans out and take is from there I think. My sis is having a more intimate wedding than me and is more stuborn so I think it will be interesting to see how things progress.

I would prefer to not take up places with my step sisters if I have friends who Id rather invite but would not be upset by their presence generally. Im sort of thinking that if I invite them they might not come anyway.

I do think this will be my only battle on guest list issues for my side and perhaps its not worth an arguement when I may have more issues wiith some of the people my H2B will wasnt to invite. Some of his school friends have taken a different path in life and I fear that they will be a little over confident in volume through the evening! Ah the joys of diplomacy!

Hey chick, we're having a similar problem with BIL's gf. Those who have seen my posts will know that we dont like her at all (she's constantly been rude and such to me and OH etc etc) I tried to get on with her for the sake of OH and his brother but we are now back to square one after she started having digs at me again. So now we're wondering whether she should be invited at all. So I undestand how you feel!!!!