Guest list nightmares

Ok. I think you should look at venues first.

If you pick somewhere which can only hold 20 guests then you will know exactly where you are with numbers and can invite people you want up to that number. Then you have the excuse of numbers to stop people being offended that they wernt invited. Having said that, if you pick a venue wihich will hold a large number then you will need to be a little more creative as to why they havent been invited.

The most important thing to remember is that its your day and you have to do what suits you both, or you may end up feeling railroaded and that the day isnt yours anymore.

Yep, i deffinatly say pick a small venue, then there is no way you can invite everybody!

I like your thinking!!!! :o)

I'm quite excited about going to view some in May as I will also get to see my mum which is a rarity but guess we will just have to be decisive and then make sure we stick to it!

Yep decisive is good.

Are you planningon having an evening reception? Perhaps you can have a few more to your evening celebrations?

With us, budget was a serios thing, and so i was going to get married in the normal marriage room at the register office but it only held 40, which wasnt enought for us, so i have had to upgrade to the next room which is stunning but costs quite a bit. It holds 70. this has covered our family, but some cousins etc arnt invited because we cant fit them in. They are on a reserve list!!

Then everyone else can come to the night.

Not a traditional evening reception, more just a continuation of the meal. I really didn't want to do a first dance and although I asked my uncle if he would get my aunty up (he used to be asked to accompany ladies at the royal dinners due to his dancing skills) and if my brother's girlfriend would drag him up I have a feeling we would end up being coerced into doing one and it is our worst nightmare. Yeah I go dancing if I go out on the town but that is a whole other kettle of fish!!

What we were hoping to do is have a church ceremony in the church I went to as a child which I have always dreamed of getting married in and then having pics taken etc while everyone else is en-route to the venue (whereever that may be) and then have a few drinks and chat before the meal is done, no speeches as neither my dad nor OH want to do one, have a meal with some background music and then socialise. Although I am a bit stuck as to how it would work without a dance as such!

If I manage to get away without inviting cousins it will mainly be older folk there bar about 15 friends who wouldn't have to worry about putting a hip out whilst doing a jig!! :o)

The venue I looked at down here would have allowed us to have the ceremony in a small, absolutely beautiful tudor room and then it would be a small walk across the courtyard to the reception room (a converted bar) but it was in the region of 8k.

Are you having children to yours? My OH's has two nieces and a nephew who would obviously be getting invites but could I then state no children to the rest of the potential entourage?

I am told once this headache is over the planning will be fun, at the minute I'm longing for that! :o)

Hmmm, the kids thing is really hard.

I have 2 kids, and one is best man the other page boy, along with our nephew. Then a friend of mine is bringing her children. I didnt want to invite the kids, but i didnt feel i could state no kids if kids are going to be there. I tried to get round it by advising her it was on a school day and perhaps her and her hubby could take kids to grandparents and have a romantic night away in the hotel together.......alas, she decided to bring her kids.

I genuinly have no idea who to sit them with, they arnt the easiest of people to get on with, and i wouldnt want to sit others with children...........

oh god... seating plans!! Hadn't even thought about that properly.

I do remember going to a wedding when I was about 18 and being sat with all the wee children. Just as well I really like kids but even then, by the end of the evening enough was enough, esp as they were tired. Guess only way to do it would be seat everyone else first and then fit them in. I would have jumped at the chance of romantic evening away!! :o)