Hi all!
It's the first time since March, when my OH and I started planning our 2011 wedding, that we feel a bit deflated... Just wanted to sound off, I don't really expect any replies, by the way.
I keep reading in magazines and wedding books about how to "make the cut" when it comes to the guest list as most people have too many people to invite.
Yet we have the opposite problem and now I am upset because even the few people we REALLY wanted at our wedding may not be able to make it. [:'(] It feels like we're going to have the most beautiful venue, a gorgeous pair of bridesmaids, a funny Best man, a beautiful MoB, gorgeous Winter Wonderland theme...and an empty room!
Let me explain as briefly as I can: I am originally from Romania, although I have studied, lived and worked in England for 15 years now. Hence my family is still there (my parents are divorced and so are my H2B's, only his Dad has remarried, my parents have not). My H2B has had a huge fallout with his family a few years back when he was in RAF and his mother lied to everyone that she had cancer and my OH believed her, came out of RAF to look after her, took loans etc, to help her only to find out she lied so he went back to RAF but couldn't cut it this time as his head was too messed up. Needless to say he hasn't spoken to her since despite her trying to reach him by various ways, even through his grandma, whom was at one point the only person he spoke to in the family apart from his cousin who is going to be Best Man. So she won't be at the wedding. But my OH also doesn't want there any of his 6 aunts and uncles (his mother's siblings) with whom he had fallouts. As if this wasn't enough, my father doesn't even acknowledge my fiance, sends Xmas cards addressed to me only, never asks about him or even mentions him so we have not even told my dad yet about the wedding! However, my mum loves my fiance to bits, as her own son, and she is very supportive of him, and my fiance's dad is very nice to me and always says he is grateful to me for the way his son turned out (he was very down when I met him and was on a dangerous path of depression and not having a reason to do anything with his life and now he is doing brilliantly!).
So, long story short, his friends from RAF are long gone, in all corners of the country, not kept in touch, and I don't have many close friends either, apart from one who is one of my BMs and my OH's sister who is the other BM.
We are now struggling with our wedding guest list and feel sad about it. My mum says at least we don't have to agonise over cutting people off, but recently the economic situation in Romania is starting to go down the route of Greece, and it breaks my heart, not only for the country as a whole, but also as it means my other, Romanian best friend with whom I grew up, her husband and her daughter (who was to be junior BM) may now not be able to come to the wedding (flights, hotel etc), and the same goes for my cousin, and my male best friend from Romania who was going to give me away instead of my dad. They can't tell us for sure "until nearer the time"... I know there's still 18 months to go but i can't stop worrying - I will feel so lonely and like I don't belong, like I don't have a family or friends as no one apart from Mum seems to be able to make it. My other part of the family lives in Norway, and although they don't have money issues so far they have not indicated that they'd love to come! In fact they have not mentioned it at all!
Yet we want a beautiful white wedding, not a registry Office one, (no disrespect or offense intended to any bride here that has a RO wedding!), we have booked already for a small wedding at Harewood House (40-50 at the wedding breakfast including bridal party), we have a date, and already bought parts of outfits etc. For my OH is his first (and hopefully last!) marriage and my fisrt wedding was not what I would have liked but that's another story!
Sorry for the long rant, ladies, I just needed to get it off my chest... Anyone else has the trouble of not enough guests? Guess not...Thanks for listening! xxx
