Having to drop the bombshell

Never going to be an easy one but it sounds like you handled it well. Hopefully she'll pass the message around a bit so you get less of those conversations than you're expecting.

I think that's fine. It might not be easy but there's no way to sugar coat it. Guest numbers are often limited at weddings so don't feel bad.

Ooh, touchy subject for some! It does sound like you handled it very well though, and if she took it well then even better. I dread having to do this! I still see (but not regularly) a handful of high school friends who I used to be very close to, but as we've grown up we've grown apart. I remember a few years ago we were talking about weddings and one of them said something along the lines of "oh we'll be getting an invite to your wedding anyway, and not one of these silly evening invites!". Turns out, that's now exactly what I want to give them since I hardly see them, but this conversation always sticks in my head! Not looking forward to that conversation!

Not so much with the work colleagues, as I don't think they expect it - but I'm dreading this with random estranged aunts, uncles, cousins, etc. I've got a cousin who I'm friends with on Facebook who thinks he's coming - despite the fact that I've only ever met him twice...and he lives a 20 minute drive away so it's not as though it's distance getting in the way.

I think you handle it very well. Most people will understand when you tell them it is just close friends and family. if someone did take offence is that really someone you would want at your wedding?

x

Anyone who is rude enough to make an assumption about receiving an invitation to your wedding and, even worse, actually say so to you, doesn't really deserve too much sugar-coating when you explain that they aren't invited

Sounds like you handled it OK. I don't think there's an easy way but m'eh, what do people expect?

I was quite proud of how it came out when I had to 'break the news' as im normally one for speaking then thinking ?, I do try and change the subject, but it seems to crop up again in convo a bit later on.

My younger brother has told me that my older sister thinks her daughter [my niece] will look gorgeous as my bridesmaid - although nothing has been said to me yet i'm not sure how i'm going to explain that won't be happening ?

Also had a couple of friends text me when they found out I was engaged with things along the lines of 'can't wait for the big day' when they are not actually going to be invited

Looking forward to more info

I'm dreading telling lots of people they're not invited to the ceremony, my other half and I have large families and we've decided just to have 40 people at the ceremony the only family members are parents, grandparents and siblings, the rest is made up of our close friends who we want there with us.

Mind you to avoid all of this we're not telling anyone about it until 6 months before the wedding, my other half has been engaged before and his family just kept pressuring him into things he didn't want so we've decided to book it all the way we want it, then tell everyone!

My godfather is an opera singer and a college music lecturer and is singing at our wedding. I'm friends (only from school 7 years ago!)with one of his students who said he "can't wait til my wedding so he can hear him sing cos he never sings for his students"

I was so shocked he thought he would be invited to my actual ceremony that i just giggled ridiculously, he will just wait until he gets his evening invite til he finds out, so well done for having the guts to tell people, Im a total woose haha !!! x

That sounds like it went fairly well. I managed to avoid being 'asked' by bringing it up at work. I have said to people (only in past week or so as it happens) that due to budget etc we are unable to invite them to the meal, but I will put up an invite at work as they are more than welcome to come in the evening and come to the church if they would like to.