Hello :-) Newbie here with a question regarding Bridesmaids x

I don't think they always get to keep them! You could say you want them as you can sell them after but they can keep them as their bridesmaids presents?

I'm only buying the dresses mine have to pay for the rest! (apart from my daughter lol)

oh and welcome to Hitched!

Thank you for your reply. My sister text me yesterday and said 'you do realise you also have to buy us a present' (she's 1 of 2 bridesmaids). I did tell her that I was paying for everything,so we will class that as their presents. The only thing im not paying for is their nails, if they want them done they will have to pay themselves.

If im honest, I did want the dresses back to sell on, but after being told by a few people they let their bridesmaids keep the dresses,I assumed that was something I had to do.

We will buy a present for the groomsmen and best man,as we are hiring their suits,so they wont be able to keep theirs anyway xx

I'd be pissed off if one of mine said that - especially as you've got 3 little onews its a bit thoughtless, most people planning a wedding are on a bit of a budget!! I'd keep the dresses and sell them on! I'm not doing that myself but if I needed the money I would!!!I sacked one of my bridesmaids for a few reasons - one being that she striaight away said oh you'll have to buy me a gorgeous dress - no offer to buy it herself and made a snotty comment when I said she'd have to get her own shoes lol

I did think it was unfair for her to say that, she is lucky she is my sister lol. She can keep her dress as she seems more 'into' the wedding than my other bridesmaid. I think ill have the other dress back though, and her gift will be hair/make up and shoes.

Gosh, no wonder you sacked her, that was well out of order! Did you find another bridesmaid to take her place? The only thing my bridesmaids have asked for with regards to the dress, is that they prefer a long one,as they are both very body conscious.

Hey pcrmummy, welcome to Hitched

I'd be a bit annoyed if my bridesmaids had demanded gifts like that! We bought dresses for our BMs with the thought that they could keep them afterwards, but they were knee-length and all 4 girls said they thought they'd wear them again. If we'd gone for the traditional full-length and shiny then we might have asked for them back to sell on.

We didn't really buy them big presents either, just let them keep the dresses, jewellery, cardigans and clutch purses we'd bought them, plus bought them all a little notebook in our theme. To be honest I didn't ask a lot of them planning-wise so didn't see the need to buy them presents on top of what we'd already given.

So no, I don't think you'd be in the wrong to not buy them an extra present on top of their dresses, tiaras, shoes, hair and makeup!

I am having my 3 teenage sisters as BMs and my sister in law as maid of honour.

My Dad has offered to buy the girls dresses which is great so they can keep them after, I'm paying for their hair and as a gift I am getting them a pandora bracelet as they all love mine.

Hi! Welcome to hitched!

It's totally up to you what you do, if you want to sell the dresses on then tell them that is what you are planning on doing and collect the dresses from them at some point after the wedding.

If you are buying them hair accessories and jewellery to wear on the day why don't you wrap them and give them to them the morning of the wedding so that it is more obvious that they are receiving a gift?

And if your sister makes a comment like that again just remind her that she needs to get you one too!

? welcome to Hitched. Agree with Soulmates, this way you can kill two birds with one stone, so to speak.

Tizmelou sorry this is a bit off topic but u said you 'sacked' a bridesmaid - I am very close to doing this but thought it was not done - I just wondered how soon after u asked her u 'sacked her? I haven't got the dresses or anything yet so it isn't too late just not sure if I can do it!

I asked her to be my bridesmaid because i was her bridesmaid and we were best friends about 12 years ago plus she is married to my cousin. But our whole wedding just seems like too much of an effort for her lots of little things I wont bore you with but similar to what you said about yours.

Any advice welcome :o)

IMHO most of the things you chose for your BMs to match your day don't realy count as gifts eg their hair/make-up/dresses/shoes etc. BMs dresses are a necessity if you're having BMs (regardless of who pays for them) however this does not mean they always get to keep them, many brides sell them on afterwards and is a good way of getting a little bit of money back. It's also a tradition for the bride to buy her BMs a gift. Yeah your sister was very cheeky and pretty rude and if I were in your position I'd tell her to stop being so greedy but it's still true really!

Thank you for all your advice. Soulmates that is a great idea, I didnt think of that ?