Help!!! i need advice on how to approach my cousins about their dad!!

Could you just ring them up and invite them that way? Then you can politely ask them not to tell him - it might come across better then written on an invite.

Yes, I'd give them a ring and explain the situation as they must know their dad has caused riffs throughout the family. Explain that you'd love them to go but you're worried that if he went there would be arguments. Hopefully they'll understand.

Can I ask how old your cousins are? If they are youngish I.e. not adults I'd speak to their mum because asking them to keep a secret from their dad is not fair on them.

If they are adults then yes just speak to them and explain as best you can the situation without slating their dad

thanks for the advice ladies, I don't actually have their phone numbers, but I can message them on fb for them. i'm not sure how old they are, but I know they are a few years younger than me so they are 18-22 ish so adults yes, but only just! i'm just dead worried that they will either be offended or tell their dad anyway :/ but because I havnt spoken to them in a while I don't have a clue if they even speak to him theirselves, I know one didn't for a long time, but she did make up with him.

Actually, I'd not invite them. They live a bit away and even if they are aware on some level that your Uncle has caused problems within the family, unless they have had a major falling out with him they are likely to be affornted on his behalf.

He's their Dad, and you are about to tell them that everyone in the family is invited to a big party except him. Unless you are sure that they are estranged from him I wouldn't run the risk of him finding out, especially if you think that he would turn up just to cause trouble.

It's great that you want to renew your friendship with your cousins, but you'd hardly have a chance to speak to them on your wedding day, so why not make a date to get together with them afterwards?